Birth Proccess

iamalexis9 · February 2015

This is my first time being pregnant Im 20yrs of age. It wasn't planned my doctor failed to inform when I had a UTI that the prescribed medication would cancel out my birth control. Not to mention I got pregnant my very first time having sex(crazy right). Long story short Im really nervous about giving birth I have a really short tolerance for pain. Even though I'm not due until Sept2015, I would like to know does an epidural really help the pain or should I just go for it naturally? Also what is a good stretch mark/itching cream that I could use?

missliz53 · February 2015

All my friends who have had epidural a swear by them; they said they were one of the best decisions they made. I do know that sometimes they don't work (this is what I'm scared of since local anesthetics have never worked well on me)

julie+worrall · February 2015

I had a really good experience with both my epidurals. They almost worked TOO good. I couldn't even feel my contractions for pushing and had to rely on the monitors to tell me when I was having a contraction. But I'm sure you'll also hear plenty of horror stories of them only working on 1/2 the body or not at all. I don't think I could have made it through my first delivery without one but I wish I had gone without my second delivery. My personal feeling is that there's no need to tough it out through the pain unnecessarily if you're going to get a healthy baby out of it either way. Just trust what your body is telling you it can handle.

good luck!

rablissful · February 2015

As long as you have no history with pain killer/anesthetic issues you should be fine with an epidural.

I have fibromyalgia, which hard its roots as a nerve/pain disorder. From everything I've read, epidurals don't work for many women that tried them. I've decided to go the route of natural birth at a birth center. If you take some classes and get educated I have no doubt you could also go that route!

bpv101283 · February 2015

Team epidural here! Congrats on your pregnancy. I suggest you read through a couple of pregnancy books too! My first time they were very helpful.

kimberlykh · February 2015

My epidural worked great!

cakes27 · February 2015

Before my first, I thought I had the lowest pain tolerance ever. I really surprised myself when I went into labor, though I did end up getting an epidural because I became too tense and got the shakes. I stopped progressing around 6cm. The epidural for me was amazing, I went from 6 to 10 cm in an hour. They actually had to tell me to stop pushing. It is different for everyone though.

You might surprise yourself! You never really know until it's happening. I recommend birthing classes too. I learned a lot of really great relaxation techniques.

I like the eucerin (spelling?) calming lotion, helps with the itchiness but as a pp said, stretch marks are genetic and I'm not sure the "stretch mark creams" really work.

snikai · February 2015

I remember with my first just staring at my large belly before delivery and repeating to myself, "women live through this, women live through this...." Lol. And I was right. It hurts, plain and simple, even if you get an epidermal because you have to wait until you're 4cm dilated to get one, BUT you will live through it and it will soon become a distant memory compared to seeing your baby for the first time which is AMAZING!!

TeacherMom210 · February 2015

You should do what you think is best for you. I didn't have an epidural with my first because it was so fast. By the time I had had enough and wanted one it was pretty much time to push. My sister had to be induced and decided to go for it, and she's glad she did. It's all about what you want/need at that time.

In terms of the creams, I used Palmer's Cocoa Butter lotion and tummy butter for the stretch marks. I'm having tremendously itchy skin, partly because of pregnancy partly because of the sub zero temps here in NJ (where it is snowing AGAIN). I like Jergen's Shea Butter or Gold Bond Ultimate Softening Lotion. With my first, the only lotion that didn't make my itching worse were the body creams from Bath and Body Works, which are also nice.

tigerfish227 · February 2015

I'm told that your endorphins help quite a bit with the pain. An epidural is completely a personal choice and of you feel like you may need one it is up to you. A lot of women get them and I think it is really the norm anymore rather than the exception. I personally want to do everything as natural as possible and I don't plan on getting one but I feel like I have a pretty high pain tolerance so I'm not too worried. I'm the type of person that won't take Tylenol for a headache unless it is absolutely unbearable. I have known enough people and heard enough stories about drug addictions that I really just like to be med free when I can. For example, when I went to the Dr for a problem with my shoulder that was making it hard to breathe he had to practically force me to accept a RX for a muscle relaxer and I still only took it when it hurt too bad to sleep. Definitely do your research, you have plenty of time to think about it, and make the right decision for you.

bpv101283 · February 2015

tigerfish227 said:
I'm told that your endorphins help quite a bit with the pain. An epidural is completely a personal choice and of you feel like you may need one it is up to you. A lot of women get them and I think it is really the norm anymore rather than the exception. I personally want to do everything as natural as possible and I don't plan on getting one but I feel like I have a pretty high pain tolerance so I'm not too worried. I'm the type of person that won't take Tylenol for a headache unless it is absolutely unbearable. I have known enough people and heard enough stories about drug addictions that I really just like to be med free when I can. For example, when I went to the Dr for a problem with my shoulder that was making it hard to breathe he had to practically force me to accept a RX for a muscle relaxer and I still only took it when it hurt too bad to sleep. Definitely do your research, you have plenty of time to think about it, and make the right decision for you.

I just wanted to reply that an epidural is not a narcotic. It's anestesia which is a lot different than taking a pain killer. It's a block in that it blocks the receptors that tell your brain you are in pain.

smrdaniels · February 2015

Medical advancement is great. They will offer pain meds if you're not ready for an epidural (Do It! I got 4 hours of sleep with contractions) then waited maybe an hour after it wore off before the epidural. Horror stories are just that... worst cases made worse by drama mamas. Congratulations on the new life. Eat well and stay active, labor is natural.

adtaylor2015 · February 2015

The epidural worked well for me, initially. But by the time I was ready to push, it had completely worn off and I felt everything. Also, I believe it slowed my labor down.
Don't wait too long to get it, because it may be too late but don't get it too soon either.

apayne0731 · February 2015

I would wait and see what your labour pains are like when you get there to make that decision. Personally my contractions were more like bad period cramps that started in my back then wrapped around to my front. They were magaeable with breathing and squeezing something (my husband had to take off his wedding band because the squeezing was so hard the ring was digging in to his finger).

I had an epidural after 33 hours of labour and my doc recommended one due to exhaustion. The IV hurt more than the epidural.... just don't let your partner watch, I was leaning on my husband and he had a clear view of the needle going into my back and he almost passed out (poor guy).

In my epidural experience, one side of my body was more numb than the other, because I wasn't moving side to side often enough. I did not have the feeling to push, but I felt pressure in the left hip, turns out my daughter's head was pressing more towards my hip than the exit. Plus after I got the epidural, my doc was able to break my water pain free. You can also get a local anesthetic down there to help numb things.

My best advice? Go with the flow. Don't think about it. That was the best thing I did. No expectations, no scary thougts or decisions to make until I had to make one. I think I enjoyed my pregnancy and the birth more because of it.

You, and everyone else, will do great no matter what!

Mufflerlove · February 2015

Your pain tolerance might surprise you. I thought I had a low tolerance and my entire family spent my pregnancy telling me I'm a wimp and I will need an epidural and what not. I managed to go with any meds. My family was shocked.

lisadoninelli · February 2015

The epidural was amazing for me. Couldn't feel a thing. I think it works well for most who have it but like anything you'll hear about the ones that it did nothing for. I'm definitely having it again this time. My contractions were pretty debilitating from the get go and I always thought that I had a pretty high pain tolerance.

A lot of women go into it thinking that they can do it naturally but End up getting the epidural. I am truly amazed and have a ton of respect for those who can go all natural. I'm just not one of em.

Don't stress about it yet. You'll have plenty of time to make a decision, talk to your doctor and other moms about the right path for you.

WDDCH · February 2015

Get the book Your Best Birth by Ricki Lake. She talks about all the options available to you and helps you decide what you prefer. We can all tell you what WE prefer until blue in the face. Only you can decide which is the best choices for your birth. That doesn't mean you can't benefit from others' stories because experience helps you mold your ideals.

I had my first when I was 20, unplanned. She's turning 10 this summer. I knew nothing when I was having her. I did zero research on birth so was very unprepared. I wanted a natural birth in theory but without any preparation or knowledge I ended up requesting an epidural.

I went on to have a second daughter and had an epidural. Both these births resulted in stitches because of the position I was in, required by most hospitals/OBs when you have an epidural: flat on back.

I have a low threshold for pain. I cry when I just have a stomachache. I am a wuss. But birth is different pain. It's purposeful pain that results in the most amazing gift. And labor isn't constant pain. There is rest between contractions.

I realized I wanted to do things differently with my third, fourth and fifth babies. I had a natural hospital birth with my third, birth center birth with the fourth and a waterbirth at home with my last. I DID it. I didn't know if I could but I did it my last three births. I didn't have stitches, recovery was much easier than my epidural births and I felt more in control of the process (birthing in positions I felt led to push in).

I don't claim to be better or know better. I just knew what I desired and went for it. Don't let the excuse of "low pain tolerance" get in the way if you don't want an epidural.

All I can suggest is read, read, read. Don't be like me and be unprepared. Start with Your Best Birth. If you want a good blog, full of birth stories, check out birthwithoutfear. Author of that blog is also on IG under her blog name. Only you can decide what you want. Congrats!!!

KYmama9286 · February 2015

After having 3 babies with no epi for any of them, I can tell you natural child birth has very very little to do with pain tolerance.

One thing to consider is that regardless of epi or natural almost every hospital will require you to get an iv started upon arrival. Now, if you don't need meds or fluid through it they will often just do a hep-loc (they get the if started and set but you're not hooked up to anything) that way you're good to go in case of emergency and they don't have to waste time getting an IV placed. The rare hospital may allow you to go with nothing (I was at the hospital for such a short amount of time with #2 my midwife didn't even bother with heplock). If you can make it through the IV, you'll be fine when it comes time for an epi if you choose to get one.

iamalexis9 · February 2015

Thank you sooo much I appreciate it. (:

Jenten810 · February 2015

I agree with PP, you have to figure out what you feel most comfortable with, but I have to add this. My best friend's father always compares having a baby without an epidural to trying to change a flat tire without a jack. There's a perfectly good tool to assist with the process, why not use it?

mrsppj1 · February 2015

I've had two epidural with two of my children and one naturally while it does depend on your pain tolerance I felt everything with my oldest son with epidural my last child was a last minute epidural I was induced and after 24 hours I just needed something that would let me rest for a few my middle son was natural but I was also very drained good luck hun

blondehairblueeyeditalianbaby · February 2015

Everyone thought I was crazy when I told them I wanted to try without an Epi. My husband teased because he said I cry if I stub my toe. My labor was too fast for an Epi (4 1/2 hrs total). I did opt for IV pain meds and really wish that I didn't. I didn't realize how close I was when I asked for it. I went into labor open to going either way. I did my research and knew my options so I went in prepared. You may suprise yourself.

tigerfish227 · February 2015

@bpv101283‌ I am aware of the difference. If you read my post then you would have seen that I don't even like to take things like Tylenol. It isn't about what type of drug it is. This may be the only time I have this experience so for me, I don't want to have those moments and feelings numbed if I can avoid it. My mental aversion to medication of any kind may not be totally reasonable but it is how I feel and even if it isn't a potentially addictive drug I still prefer to bear thru and avoid what I can.

bpv101283 · February 2015

Yeah no problem - when I read your post I got the other assumption so wanted to clear it up for people who don't know that. Birthing with or without meds is a personal choice, and it's good that people do their research.

rachel4733 · February 2015

I'm a FTM so I have nothing to compare it to, but I fully plan on getting the epidural! It's totally safe, so in my opinion, there is no reason to go through the pain unnecessarily.

rablissful · February 2015

rachel4733 said:
I'm a FTM so I have nothing to compare it to, but I fully plan on getting the epidural! It's totally safe, so in my opinion, there is no reason to go through the pain unnecessarily.

Umm I would not say they are "totally safe". They are a medication, that has side effects, some of which are still unknown. However, if you mean "totally safe" as in "there are no known horribly detrimental effects" then yes, they are safe. I'm not knocking people who get epidurals, but just because most women get them does not mean there are no risks involved.

Here is a pretty thorough article with plenty of sources about some of the unintended effects of epidurals. Many of which may surprise you. https://chriskresser.com/natural-childbirth-v-epidural-side-effects-and-risks

Edit: typo

Unknown · February 2015

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kissthebunny · February 2015

I would really encourage you to prepare for a natural, med free birth, which is how I did it, and think of epidural as a back up option

it's really not scary at all!

I've heard too many horror stories of how painful the contractions are. So when I had my contractions, I didn't think of them as real because they didn't hurt as bad as I imagined! I slept, ate, even went grocery shopping during the whole day...By the time I finally felt real pressure, I decided to go to the hospital, nurse told me I'm fully dilated and ready to push. Too late for epidural lol! It took me an hour and a half to finish pushing, it's hard work but it's hard work even with epidural. Heck, I felt exhausted afterwards but when I look back I'm actually kinda proud of myself!

I hope things work out well for you too. Please know that just like pregnancy, labor is different for everyone too. If you prepare both mentally and physically for a natural birth, you might find it easier than you thought. Just my two cents.

kissthebunny · February 2015

Also I use palmers oil and lotion. They smell so good! You might also want to try Clarins or mustela. Both are a pleasure to apply but I still got some stretch marks lol

BeachBabe22 · February 2015

I did not want an epidural because your chances of having a c-section increase with an epidural. It slows down your labor and makes it difficult (for some people) for you to know when you're having contractions and when you should push. My sister's labor progressed so quickly then she got an epidural and ended up having a c-section because she didn't know when to push. I did so much research when i was pregnant with my daughter and chose not to have an epidural. My water broke and it was almost 24 hours later and my labor was not progressing so they administered pitocin. The contractions were very painful but I had my mom and husband to help me through them. I did not have an epidural and I do not plan on having one with this pregnancy either.

I would recommend reading the Bradley Method. The pictures are a little strange but it has a lot of good information.

needaprince · February 2015

I had an epidural with my first after 17 hours and an hour later I had to be woken up to finish pushing becayse she was coming out on her own. With my second I found that when I was calm and breathed through the contractions it was so much easier and I did it all natural. It was an amazing feeling. I don't remember pain, some pressure and not feeling dopey after. The epidural is great if you really are at a breaking point. It's scary with your first but no turning back. The best thing to do is hold out and let your body handle ad much pain as possible before allowing medicine to take over. We tell our tattoo clients to do this so they're not out of pain tolerance because they took meds too soon and then it wears off at the peak of pain which is usually towards the end. You'll be fine either way hun, like so many other scary things in life, it's never as bad as we make ourselves believe beforehand.

JosefinK · February 2015

needaprince said:
I had an epidural with my first after 17 hours and an hour later I had to be woken up to finish pushing becayse she was coming out on her own. With my second I found that when I was calm and breathed through the contractions it was so much easier and I did it all natural. It was an amazing feeling. I don't remember pain, some pressure and not feeling dopey after. The epidural is great if you really are at a breaking point. It's scary with your first but no turning back. The best thing to do is hold out and let your body handle ad much pain as possible before allowing medicine to take over. We tell our tattoo clients to do this so they're not out of pain tolerance because they took meds too soon and then it wears off at the peak of pain which is usually towards the end. You'll be fine either way hun, like so many other scary things in life, it's never as bad as we make ourselves believe beforehand.

Oh god!! ...this just brought back memories of getting my tattoo done all the way down my side. 9 hours of dot work, broken up into two sessions. I was so delirious afterwards from constantly trying to convince my brain to block the pain, that I can't even remember how I got home! Haha! I seriously hope I will be able to put myself in a similar trance for childbirth!

tigerfish227 · February 2015

@JosefinK I have a big white tiger down my side and I've had three 4 hour sessions already and it's not done yet. I haven't used any pain meds thru those at all. The absolute worst section was on the front/side of my rib cage when he did the stripes. I guess for me I actually kinda enjoy the pain a bit under the right circumstances so I'm not really too afraid of the pain of childbirth. After a while my mind just blocks it out for the most part.

needaprince · February 2015

Lol, but you made it, and I'm sure you felt accomplished afterwards. Women forget what child birth actually feels like the minute they have their baby because it's all worth it in the end, and you obviously forget because then we wouldn't do it again lol

WDDCH · February 2015

@JosefinK‌ if you could do that then you can give birth unmedicated lol! With childbirth the pain is purposeful and there are breaks between. I'd literally doze/sleep between contractions! I have given birth without drugs and I don't think I could do your tat!!!

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