Complicated baby shower logistics

sabisd · February 2015

I know it's a little early to be discussing baby showers, but I'm already getting questions. I'm not sure how to even have a baby shower. I moved to Texas 2 years ago and my husband and I are out here alone with no family. All of our family is in Northern California and all of my close friends are in southern california. And my MIL is in minnnesota. It's a logistical nightmare. Has anyone been in this situation and had a successful baby shower? I'm thinking of just not even having one

ToAoShesha · February 2015

Who is asking questions? Let someone else plan it and then you don't have to worry about it. For my first we had two, one at my MIL's house in a different state (but all my ILs live there) and one here and my family and friends came in town for it.

KKMichie · February 2015

We had this same situation with my sister who moved recently to a different state. We have a huge family in my sate and differing states than my sister, and they all Wanted to participate in celebrating her baby in some way, but it was hard because my sister lived so far and didn't have anyone in her state to help her. To make matters worse, due to some complications, she was not able to travel to us. SO, we had a virtual shower over google hangouts. You can have up to 10 people at a time all on video conference. So, for my family here, we had a brunch, and then my sister, and additional family from other states were on video. We had arranged it for people who wanted to send her gifts do so prior to the shower and she opened them online with us. Some people hadn't sent any yet and we're still happy to join. It was about 1.5-2 hours we had her on video. She could show is her house and the baby's room while people arrived and then people ate while she opened gifts. It worked out very nicely for our situation!

sabisd · February 2015

That's a cool idea..I hadn't thought of using video for something like that!!

Mamamads · February 2015

You don't plan it, it's something that is a gift to you by the host. Usually a close friend or family member will offer to throw it and they figure out the logistics. In some cases you have a few baby showers with the different groups if a few people offer.

youwish1 · February 2015

You could always register at Target like I did cuz then if people have their RedCard then there is free shipping so they send there gift and you can open them in a video chat like I am

carolinacamargo · February 2015

Im Brazilian and all my friends and family live in Brazil. Just me and my husband here, so we decide just skip this... I think it's ok...

gotdiesel2007 · February 2015

With all three of my kids I've been states ( or oceans away) from PA and #1 born in SC #2 CA and #3 will be Hawaii. Never had a shower.

sschwege · February 2015

It's actually quite simple, you wait for someone to offer to host a baby shower for you and graciously accept or decline. A shower is a gift giving event where the mom is the guest of honor, so therefore you do not plan your own shower.

k3taeko · February 2015

Everything I read says the mother to be does not host or plan her own shower. My husband and I also live in a different state from our families so we don't really think anyone will offer us one lol and we're fine with it.

inLOVEalready715 · February 2015

Sounds like you can have one in California and people will travel or two a friend shower and a family shower. If your MIL is the only one in a separate state im sure she plans to travel anyway.

mrspark812 · February 2015

ToAoShesha said:
Who is asking questions? Let someone else plan it and then you don't have to worry about it. For my first we had two, one at my MIL's house in a different state (but all my ILs live there) and one here and my family and friends came in town for it.

We did the exact same thing...IL did one at their house out of state for DH'S family and then my mom did one here for it friends and family. But like others said you shouldn't be hosting your own. If people are asking you questions just politely say idk I'm not in charge of planning it I'll get back to you when I know more details. Or direct them to the person who is hosting (of you know that).

Kmommy5 · February 2015

I understand why people may be asking you about the shower, they probably feel unable to think of a way to throw you one. Its makes sense for them to look to you for answers. Will there be any family reunions before your baby is born? Maybe you can have it then. Or just have a welcome home baby/shower. But not for too long you will need your rest. That's the only thing I can think of. I wish I could be more help!

inkblotanna · February 2015

My husband is in the military so we were away from family too. Typically someone should offer to throw you one. My best friend and mom did a "baby shower by mail" which really just meant them sending out invitations and people sending us gifts. It was fun. I've heard of people having Skype baby showers if you want to open and show off your baby loot. Or people travel home and celebrate.

sabisd · February 2015

No one has offerred. My bestie in just had a baby last week so she is overwhelmed. Everyone was just asking me if I knew where it would be. A lot of my friends don't know each other very well. My mom also passed away a few years ago and my aunt passed away last week, so not really any other women in my family and I don't think my dad would have the slightest clue

guess I'll wait to see if someone offers and if not just skip it ...

LovelyMissLizzie · February 2015

If I were you I would open an online registry on Target's website or Walmart's website or even Amazon. Then send out "invitations" for people to access those registries online & have your gifts shipped to you through the website. My friend did this as most of her family lived in another state & it worked out perfectly(:

sschwege · February 2015

LovelyMissLizzie said:

If I were you I would open an online registry on Target's website or Walmart's website or even Amazon. Then send out "invitations" for people to access those registries online & have your gifts shipped to you through the website. My friend did this as most of her family lived in another state & it worked out perfectly(:

Why not send out 'invitations' to contribute to her baby's 529 account when its born too? It's never OK to ask people for gifts @lovelymisslizzie

Mamamads · February 2015

sschwege said:

LovelyMissLizzie said:

If I were you I would open an online registry on Target's website or Walmart's website or even Amazon. Then send out "invitations" for people to access those registries online & have your gifts shipped to you through the website. My friend did this as most of her family lived in another state & it worked out perfectly(:

Why not send out 'invitations' to contribute to her baby's 529 account when its born too? It's never OK to ask people for gifts @lovelymisslizzie

Okay I didn't know if I was reading that wrong or that really was as terrible as I thought. Op, make a registry for you to have a list of what you need and if you end up having a shower it will be ready. If people want to buy you a gift they don't need an invitation to do so and will inquire about your registry. Please don't sent out invitations to purchase gifts.. Terrible suggestion.

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