AP nighttime routine with two — The Bump
Attachment Parenting

AP nighttime routine with two

I'm getting closer to having two and I'd love to hear how you did a nighttime routine with more than one kiddo.

Right now DS sleeps in a toddler bed but often falla asleep in my bed and then gets moved to his and then wakes up around three or four and comes back. He also takes forever to fall asleep.
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Re: AP nighttime routine with two

  • When we had 2 under 2, we did divide and conquer when needed (though they rarely fell asleep at the same time). We'd help DS1 fall asleep in his floor bed by laying with him. When he'd wake in the night, he'd come and sleep between us. DS2 would get nursed or patted to sleep in the sidecar next to me and stay there. Usually we did well all 4 in one bed, but if it just wasn't working then DH would go into DS1's bed or I'd take DS2 to twin mattress while DS1 and DH stayed in our bed. (DS1 developed intense feelings about having baby and me in his <empty> bed, so we did eventually stop putting that in the mix.) With time, DS1 did need to learn to fall asleep by himself, as it was taking 2 hours of mauling us in his bed and then incessant chatting while we were across the room and resentment was growing. But, that took a very long, gradual process.

    For naps, I did work very hard to get baby down when DS1 took his daily nap. When they were little, I would put them in one bed, nurse DS2 to sleep while DS1 snuggled against my back. When they both were asleep, I could sit up and do some work from my laptop (or from nearby to still keep an eye because cobedding with the youngest under 18 months is risky).

    At age 2 and 4, at bed we have a 20 minute bedtime routine followed by 5-10 minutes of snuggles, prayer, song, etc. in bed. This is mostly for the benefit of the 4 year old who still asks for cuddles to sleep, comes in mid-night, etc. whereas DS2 is very chill about bedtime. For nap, they go down at the same time, though DS1 sometimes stays in his bed and reads for "quiet time" instead of sleeping.

  • My situation is a little different. Husband works out of town for 2-3 weeks at a time, so I solo-parent a lot. I have a 3.5 year old and 9 month old - both BF'ing. Bedtime starts at 6:45-7 after dinner. We all 3 get in the tub together (garden style tub) and I lather up baby while DD soaps herself and plays. This also allows me to wash my face before I go to sleep. Baby and I get out, DD plays. Baby and I put on PJ's and I nurse him. While he is nursing, I help DD dry off and brush teeth, comb hair. Then she puts on her jammies and we all lie down for a story or 2. Then she gets a turn to nurse (just 2-4 minutes) and lights out, white noise on, and we all snuggle in with me in the middle. DS nurses to sleep while DD cuddles.
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  • My situation is a little different. Husband works out of town for 2-3 weeks at a time, so I solo-parent a lot. I have a 3.5 year old and 9 month old - both BF'ing. Bedtime starts at 6:45-7 after dinner. We all 3 get in the tub together (garden style tub) and I lather up baby while DD soaps herself and plays. This also allows me to wash my face before I go to sleep. Baby and I get out, DD plays. Baby and I put on PJ's and I nurse him. While he is nursing, I help DD dry off and brush teeth, comb hair. Then she puts on her jammies and we all lie down for a story or 2. Then she gets a turn to nurse (just 2-4 minutes) and lights out, white noise on, and we all snuggle in with me in the middle. DS nurses to sleep while DD cuddles.

    I have a question if you don't mind. Does dd only nurse 3-4 mins because she stops on her own or do you stop her? My 2 year old (25 months) is very excited that her mommy milk is back now that my other daughter has been born. But she wants to nurse for ever. I feel bad stopping her but with a 3 week old newborn I can't sit around all day and night to let her nurse.
    Just looking into how others do it while nursing 2.
    Thanks!
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