Pregnant after a Loss

PgAl view of team green

So what's all your ladies views in being team green? This is my fifth pregnancy and the only one with a good ultrasound so I'm being optimistic. I go back and forth on the idea. I want to know everything there possibly is to know about this baby but at the same time I think waiting would be a super great surprise. I can almost imagine the feeling of meeting your baby for the first time, really meeting them, I mean you didn't even know if they were a boy or a girl yet! My drs office does anatomy scans at sixteen weeks so I want to have a game plan as soon as possible. Thoughts?
8/17/12 Miscarriage at 9 weeks. Fetal Growth stopped 6w6d 2/15/13 Chemical pregnancy 8/21/13 BFP! MMC oct 8th measured 8w5d

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Re: PgAl view of team green

  • I was team green with my DS, he was pre losses, so I was comptetely excited to be TG. The other day DH and I were talk about being team green again or not. I was explaining to him that I loved being team green with DS but I find myself not being able to bond with this pregnancy like I did with my DS and so I'm leaning towards us finding out but not telling others. 

    Not sure if I helped but this has also been on my mind. 

    "Love is what makes pain bearable." - I love you my Angels. 
    **All After a Loss Welcome**
    BFP #1: 6/25/09 EDD 2/13/10 @ 6 weeks- Saw HB @ 9 weeks - DS born 2/11/10 (39w5d)
    BFP #2: 2/20/13 EDD 11/4/13 - Saw HB 3/19/13 (7w2d) - MMC discovered 4/13/13 (10w5d) - Est. loss @ 9w3d - D&C 4/14/13
    BFP #3: 12/19/13 (4 w1d) EDD 8/27/14 - 1/1/14 discovered it was ectopic/ tube had burst/ had surgery to remove tube (@ 6 weeks)
    BFP #4: 9/10/14 (3w6d) EDD 5/21/15 - natural MC 9/23/14 @ 5w5d
    BFP #5: 11/23/14 (3w3d) EDD 8/4/15 - Please be our Rainbow!
     

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  • Like @mara005 I was TG with my son pre-loss. We stayed Team Green this pregnancy. I really like being Team Green but it was harder due to loss this time around.

    Married August 2003

    BFP: January 8, 2012
    Due: September 5, 2012
    DS: August 14, 2012

    BFP: November 5, 2013
    Due: July 11, 2014
    MMC Detected d&c: December 29, 2013 12w5d

    BFP: June 10, 2014
    Due: February 16, 2015


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  • I was going to be team green until it took 2.5 years and lots of medical intervention to stay pregnant long enough to find out. By the time it came up for us, I was beyond ready for a sticky baby and just impatient to know as much as it could. My DH was never really on board with TG, so I think that swayed me, too.

    You can't unknow, but you could postpone knowing as long as you can stand it. Perhaps an option is to get them to put the sex in an envelope when they know, and you and your DH can take time to decide if you want to see it or not. :)

    **********************siggy/ticker warning**********************

    ***Losses mentioned.*** TTC #1 since May 2012. Me: 37, OH: 41. Ectopic August 2012 => tubal damage. :'(  Stage 1 endo removed June 2013. IVF #1 Oct/Nov 2013: Long Lupron with Gonal-F. 7R, 7M, 7F. 2 txfer@3d. Nothing frozen.  => M/C @ 8 wks. :'( Selected RPL panel all normal. Very hyper and brittle response to stims. IVF #2 (antagonist protocol) Feb 2014 => Converted to IUI (Perfect conditions). BFN. IVF #2.1 w/ new RE June 2014: Antagonist protocol. 33R, 31M, 30F, 19 blasts to test!!! I made it through without crashing!! :) Hats off to Dr. Fancypants!! ET of one 5AB blast. BFN. 13 10 CCS'ed snowflakes! FET #1 PUPO as of 7/29 Betas: 8/7@24, 8/9@97, 8/11@334 (etc.) Two sacs on 8/15, one seen on 8/18 after a bleed. U/s 8/25 (6+3) "perfect": 5.9 mm + HB@120bpm! U/s 9/4 (7+6): 15.9 mm + HB@172 bpm! Please, PLEASE stick this time!!!!
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  • I'm to anxious to be TG, I found out with both my angel and rainbow. Helps me with bonding and separating this pregnancy from my angel. It's a very personal choice

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        My Blog

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    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    BFP# 1 7/7/12 Beautiful DD born still at 36 weeks 5 days on 3/2/13
    Diagnosed with PCOS in 2005. Started Metformin July 2013

    BFP # 2 8/7/14 EDD 4/22/15
    Please be our rainbow!!

    **All AL Welcome**

  • We've always wanted to be team green (my husband's idea really)  I wouldn't mind knowing and not telling anybody, including DH!  Then we could both get our way.  I do feel that being team green is definitely fun, but I don't know if I will be able to stand it!  I might just have to take a peek at the US at just the right moment ;)

    Me 34 DH 31, Together since 2003, Married August 20, 2011,  TTC since May 2013
    BFP #1 August 24, 2013! MMC discovered Oct. 3, 2013, D&C Oct. 4, 2013
    BFP #2 December 17, 2013! MMC discovered Jan. 28, 2014, D&C Jan. 30, 2014
    Testing done: male with complete Trisomy 16, not hereditary. Tested me for clotting disorders, all normal.
    Feb. 2014 all clear again to TTC!  Will start progesterone supplementation with the next BFP just in case.       Oct. 2014 more testing just because, thyroid and autoimmune panels = normal.  Diagnostic U/S = no abnormalities.  Will keep trying for 3-6 more months, doctor still optimistic!

    BFP #3 December 11, 2014!  Beta #1 14DPO = 122.4 Beta #2 17DPO = 296.8 Please stick little one and be our Rainbow!

            Perfect little heartbeat of 156 seen 1/7/15 :)

    ***Everybody Welcomed***  :)  

    EDD 8/21/2015 Team Green!

    IAmPregnant Tickerrainbows                

     photo Multiple4_zps436a50cc.jpg photo April3_zps882432ab.jpg August 2 

    August 2015 Siggy Challenge: Favorite mean girl from a movie or show:  Kathy Bates in "Misery"

  • I have no will power to ever be team green ;)

    Personally, I love knowing boy/girl earlier on because it just helps me bond so much with the baby (though I have nothing to compare it to, I'm sure I'd "bond" regardless).
    image
    DS1 born 4/17/11
    DS2 born 2/22/13
    MMC 5/16/14@8w2d
    DD due 5/9/15 Please be our
    RAINBOW


    imageimage
  • I'm a planner/information seeker by nature so with DS I really wanted to know so I could feel more prepared. With this LO I don't have that feeling b/c we have everything we need from DS and if it happens to be a girl we can get clothes after she's born. So this time we are TG.

    Started TTC Nov. 2011 

    1st clomid cycle June 2012- No response :: HSG August 2012- Left tube blocked, right tube clear :: 2nd clomid cycle Aug. 2012 BFN :: 3rd clomid cycle Sept. 2012 :: BFP Sept 30th :: DS born 6/15/13 :: BFP #2 7/29/14 M/C 8/5/14 :: BFP#3 10/20/14 DD born 7/1/2015 :: Applied to be surrogate April '17 :: Transferred 1 Embryo for IFs Dec. '17 :: Surro Babe born 9/11/18 :: Started 2nd Journey May '19 :: Transferred 1 Embryo for new IFs 9/24/19 :: HB 138 at 6w6d


  • For me my loss was early. There was no way for us go known if we had lost a boy or girl. For this one its important for me to know as early as possible so I can bond with this baby. I know there's is never a safe time so if something were to happen this time I would want to know if it was a boy or girl. I feel like the sooner I can start the nursery and start buying clothes the more real it will be for me.

    Ashleigh (26) and Darren (26)
    Married 8-10-13
    TTC since February 2014
    BFP #1 4-22-14  EDD 1-1-15
    8w u/s 5-22-14 Baby measuring 6w1d. Heartbeat detected
    Went to Dr. 5-30-14 due to bleeding. Prescribed progesterone
    Went to ER 6-1-14 2:30 AM - diagnosed with incomplete m/c
    6-6-14 natural m/c completed
    10-24-14 BFP #2 EDD 7-6-15 **Please** be our Rainbo

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  • I lost my babies before we could find out. It was hard for me to not know. I'm
    Finding out with this one (hopefully) Wednesday. Also, I have no self control to wait on something like this.
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    Angel baby 3/2014 at 5.5 weeks
    Angel baby 6/2014 MMC at 7.5 weeks
  • I found out the sex because like PP's I was having trouble bonding. I am the only one who knows IRL, I haven't told anyone that I know. Even DH is team green, so for me it has helped me to bond because regardless of what the sex is, it feels like this LO and I share a secret together that nobody else does.

    I actually find myself feeling sad as I approach my EDD that once she arrives we won't have this special secret just between the two of us anymore. I don't know if that makes any sense but it's how I have been feeling lately.






     


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    Anniversary

    TTC Since 04/01/13 

    BFP #1 04/28/13 Its twins! EDD 01/08/2014 MMC confirmed 06/27/13 D&C 07/17/13

    BFP#2 05/19/14 EDD 01/30/2015 Please be our rainbow!

    My Ovulation Chart

    *~*~* All AL Welcome*~*~*


  • I was team green with my first baby then i lost it. I wanted to be with this one too but i kinda had my heart set on disney princesses and cute girl clothes so hubby told me we should find out so that if we had a boy I would have time to cope with that. We decided not to tell anyone though so that we wouldn't have our baby surrounded by blue or pink the day they were born and this would be our first living baby so I wanted the big things to be gender neutral and reusable for our next one. We did learn our Peep is a boy and I am glad I know because I am afraid I would have been disappointed if i didn't have this time to deal with my emotions over that. Don't get me wrong. Any healthy baby is awesome. I just was so sure it was a girl and would have felt so weird that it wasn't. Also the fact that I lost the first one too early to ever know made me want to know with this one. I think whatever you decide follow your heart about it. There is no wrong answer. =)
    -Megan


    Started dating Hubby May 17 2005. Married since Aug 20 2011 
    Me:30   Hubby:31
    TTC since May 2012 
    HSG Dec 2012 Fill no spill on left side, right side normal (most physically painful experience of my life..)
    Metformin Started May 2013
    PG#1: BFP 10-21-13. EDD 6-17-14 mmc 12-9-13 m/c occurred with cytotec on 12-11-13 
    PG#2: BFP 07-25-14.  EDD 4-5-15   *Hoping this is my rainbow*
    Diagnosed with PCOS, Hypothyroid,IBD/UC, (UC in remission as of July 2014)
    *I will always love you Fetey the first.* 
    image

    ALL WELCOME!



  • Thanks for sharing all your opinions and experiences ladies! We still haven't made a  decision but I'm not so sure my wife will be on board with team green, so I'm thinking I might just have the secret kept from me. Then we both get what we want! That is, if I can hold out until birth.
    8/17/12 Miscarriage at 9 weeks. Fetal Growth stopped 6w6d 2/15/13 Chemical pregnancy 8/21/13 BFP! MMC oct 8th measured 8w5d

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  • I have mixed feelings. I'm such a planner-type person that I don't like the idea of not being able to plan much ahead, like will I need to buy girl clothes, since my living child is a boy?

    Also, one of the things I've struggled with being that my losses were early is that I never got to know if it was a boy or girl, and the first one (around 12 years ago) never even had a name.

    On the other hand, at this point in my pregnancy, I'm like, I don't care if it's a boy or a girl, I just care that it has a heartbeat! Once I get past 12 weeks and the risk of miscarriage is lower, I'll be eager to know. Knowing a loss can happen at any time, I want to honor my child with a name as soon as possible.

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  • I have a girl and boy before my loss I kind of want to go TG.  you need to decide what works best for you and DH!
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