useful tips for FTMs

Jessica16393 · January 2015

Im a STM and while I know it's been posted before I think it's time for another. While some moms know the majority of what is going on some FTM don't have their mom's advice or other women in their life to talk about little stuff like nesting or other non important stuff.
I'm going to explain my version of nesting. To me it's you getting ready for baby and me I don't realize I'm even doing it. I just spent 6 hours scrubbing my floors toilets and everything else. Didn't realize I had done so much until it's done. I love hearing other tips and randoms coming from you ladies.

So what do we have that we can teach our FTMs??

blu-eyedwife · January 2015

Was the post on this last week too long ago?

Jessica16393 · January 2015

Yes

Jessica16393 · January 2015

Well my tip is baking soda. It's been my best friend since being pregnant. I use it to clean the oven, the fireplace door (glass) toilets and even brush my dogs teeth with it. Hard chemicals are bad. MmKay?

mishmardhiono · January 2015

You brush your dogs teeth??? And then you brush them with baking soda? Wow..

carolyngrace · January 2015

Just... bump up the other thread if you want to add more tips....

girlymama79 · January 2015

I don't think anyone likes these threads...

lauraedg · January 2015

I like these sort of posts. And I find some that are over a week old are too old because how many new posts are created in a day and how many people post into posts. If you want to start a discussion what is wrong with that.
It seems to me that this week there is a lot of cranky women out there. I guess Iv not but that stage yet.
Iv not got to the nesting stage yet either I don't think. I think I may be one of the lucky ones who doesn't look pregnant had very little symptoms and really doesn't feel pregnant. So odd. But lovely.
I wish everyone a safe and healthy pregnancy

Trampslikeus · January 2015

lauraedg said:

It seems to me that this week there is a lot of cranky women out there. I guess Iv not but that stage yet.

Well, thank The Lord for that, right??? Good thing we have you here to point this out for us!

Baking soda and being cranky - there we have it ladies, our problems and worries are all solved.

girlymama79 · January 2015

lauraedg said:

It seems to me that this week there is a lot of cranky women out there. I guess Iv not but that stage yet.
Iv not got to the nesting stage yet either I don't think. I think I may be one of the lucky ones who doesn't look pregnant had very little symptoms and really doesn't feel pregnant. So odd. But lovely.

IsadoraB · January 2015

lauraedg said:

I like these sort of posts. And I find some that are over a week old are too old because how many new posts are created in a day and how many people post into posts. If you want to start a discussion what is wrong with that. It seems to me that this week there is a lot of cranky women out there. I guess Iv not but that stage yet. Iv not got to the nesting stage yet either I don't think. I think I may be one of the lucky ones who doesn't look pregnant had very little symptoms and really doesn't feel pregnant. So odd. But lovely. I wish everyone a safe and healthy pregnancy

Can someone translate this into english for me?

IsadoraB · January 2015

lauraedg said:

I like these sort of posts. And I find some that are over a week old are too old because how many new posts are created in a day and how many people post into posts. If you want to start a discussion what is wrong with that. It seems to me that this week there is a lot of cranky women out there. I guess Iv not but that stage yet. Iv not got to the nesting stage yet either I don't think. I think I may be one of the lucky ones who doesn't look pregnant had very little symptoms and really doesn't feel pregnant. So odd. But lovely. I wish everyone a safe and healthy pregnancy

Can someone translate this into English for me?

girlymama79 · January 2015

IsadoraB said:

lauraedg said:

I like these sort of posts. And I find some that are over a week old are too old because how many new posts are created in a day and how many people post into posts. If you want to start a discussion what is wrong with that.
It seems to me that this week there is a lot of cranky women out there. I guess Iv not but that stage yet.
Iv not got to the nesting stage yet either I don't think. I think I may be one of the lucky ones who doesn't look pregnant had very little symptoms and really doesn't feel pregnant. So odd. But lovely.
I wish everyone a safe and healthy pregnancy

Can someone translate this into English for me?

Edit quote fail.

I do believe it says:

I like posts that waste time and these ladies are meanies. Blah blah blah

Trampslikeus · January 2015

So I was brief last night because I was so mad about ttgp, but can I offer an explanation as to why these kinds of threads don't go over well and never will?

No one likes advice they didn't ask for.

I spent years working with pregnant 14-17 year olds who knew approximately jack shit about pregnancy or parenthood, to the point where one of them thought she was pregnant from a blow job.

You know what I learned quickly was guaranteed to make them defensive and sarcastic and mean?

.... Drumroll... advice they didn't ask for.

Instead, when you built them up, told them their age or lack of experience was meaningless if they committed to parenting, to trust their instincts and intuition, and that no one is really an expert at every baby, then they WOULD ask questions and seek advice.

There will be plenty of questions we will have for you STMs in the months to come where your experiences will be valued and appreciated and received by grateful ears/eyes. But if we haven't asked for it, don't expect us to throw you a Thank You Savior parade, mmmkay?

staciecoffey · January 2015

It's too damn early to be called cranky and to read condescending shit like this. I'm a FTM an doing a fan-fucking-tastic job at doing my own damn research, reading (even though I haven't bought a book, i have tons of magazines) and talking to the most important person during the entire pregnancy, my OB!

I don't need cleaning advice or to be told not inhale chemicals, pregnant or not...that's just dumb to do. How I raise my child will be how my husband and I see fit, none will be based on the advice of strangers. And like @trampslikeus said, no one likes advice that they didn't even ask for...So here's a hint offer it when it's asked of you.

junch817 · January 2015

One of the most annoying things to me as a mom is unsolicited advice. Actually, it is just annoying in general - parent or not. I'm sure the second you announced your pregnancy, it came raining down...don't eat this, don't use this product, buy these, not that. Once baby is in your arms, it's worse. However, I have received mounds of good advice over the last 3 years; when I asked for it. Or reading about it when others asked about it (on here and FB). And believe it or not, there have been positive, helpful threads on this specific board full of advice from STM+....when it was requested. I had a few things to add that helped me, or worked for me. But to just start handing out "general advice" that wasn't asked for comes across as "I'm better than you/I know more than you" behavior.

Stepping off my soap box*