Don't listen to the negativity! I know its hard, but you'll be better off If you want a third baby shower then go for it. Others opinions don't mean a thing
Don't listen to the negativity! I know its hard, but you'll be better off If you want a third baby shower then go for it. Others opinions don't mean a thing
Really dude? So you're just going to troll every post that got opinions they didn't like and agree with the OP?
_______________________ It's like high school in here. Might as well play my part and stick up for the OP. (With good reason) .. I thought you all added me to the "naughty list". Yeah I'll be okay over here away from the snark. I appreciated all of the comments I've gotten from my posts, but when I agreed with an OP last time, I got my head chewed off and told I couldn't agree with both parties of the argument. How childish..
Personally I think having multiple showers is ok however only if they are not your doing. It's like throwing yourself a birthday party each year...then letting people know if they come they need to bring a gift and here is where you registered. If someone offers to throw it for you then so be it but throwing it yourself just makes it seem like you are only interested in getting gifts. I too am in your situation, my daughter was born in 2001, my son in 2011 and now I am pregnant with another girl. I have nothing for a girl. We gave away almost all of the large items we bought for my son and have no girl clothes. I have a huge family and aside from my 13 yr old daughter all the other kids are boys. I did mention to a few of the people I gave stuff to and to others who I thought might have items I can use that we could use them if they are going to pass anything on. By doing that I got our baby swing back, and our pack and play. Also have a friend giving me a double stroller she had for her kids and no longer needs. Aside from that I plan to pick up the baby girl basics as I go along and find them on sale. Who wouldn't love a party, shoot my family has even mentioned wanting to have another one for me but I stay out of it and tell them I already had a shower and you surely won't see me planning my own.
Mother to Joelle (13), Jaxen (3) and Jayla (due 5/6)
And these all aren't "honest OPINIONS" some of these comments are flat out rude. No need for it.
No actually they aren't rude, what is rude is doing nothing to prevent pregnancy when you know you can't afford to buy the necessaries for the child and then expecting your friends and family to pick up the bill. What else is rude is when we welcomed you into this community, gave you good advice and then you basically smacked us all in the face by agreeing with someone personally harassing the same people that gave you support.
__________ And I thanked you for your support. You welcomed me, yes you did. But to make someone feel stupid for wanting another shower isn't right either. We don't know, maybe her house caught flames and all of her old used baby stuff went down with the fire. Maybe she sold some, or gave stuff away to someone with a baby. It's not fair to assume that she's some random knocked up chick wanting and wanting from people. And I didn't smack you in the face, I did agree with some of the things she said though. Not all of it. But because I love tapped the comment, I got smacked. Not fair really.
However, I still plan on being here regardless of what the regular ladies think. I understand where both sides come from. But apparently, that's NOT okay in the "regs handbook."
Well, even if it's not your fault you have nothing for the baby and you want to go with that argument... It's even LESS other peoples fault!
Honestly, when it comes to social etiquette, I'm of the opinion that you can technically do whatever you want.. Only you know your audience. However- don't be surprised if no one shows up, people talk behind your back, etc.
I can't believe this crap. I came for assistance and I've been thrown to the wolves. Seriously! My entire family will pop by to visit after the baby is born because that's who they are I don't have to throw a party for that.
Every person I know has had multiple baby showers for just about every kid they've ever had. Apparently in Texas it just something that's done because I've never not known one person to have only one baby shower for their first kid and never have another one for subsequent kids. I should tell them they did it wrong.
Excuse me for being pregnant and not having a damned thing for my child to wear or play with or be fed from cause I'm not rich enough to afford to have one baby shower and hope every child after is the same sex. Sorry for being so generous I gave my things away to friends and family who had had infants when my toddler no longer needed them. My kids were perfectly spaced surprises and this is my last one cause I was an hormonal idiot during my second pregnancy and said no to having a tubal ligation.
Thanks for the help....
Why wouldn't you keep the stuff from your first baby? My son was born three years ago and I have ever single outfit, bib, and baby item in the event we had another child. This child is a girl, but I am not asking anyone to buy me clothes for her. That is my responsibly. We are not rich by any means, so I will be attacking the Consignment sales with a vengeance.
Look, I am down with a second shower if there is a large age gap between children, but three years doesn't cut it.
I don't really care what your circle of friends have done in the past, but it's looked down upon to have a second shower and incredibly tacky to host your own.
+1 for consignment sales! I'm excited to check them out.
And these all aren't "honest OPINIONS" some of these comments are flat out rude. No need for it.
No actually they aren't rude, what is rude is doing nothing to prevent pregnancy when you know you can't afford to buy the necessaries for the child and then expecting your friends and family to pick up the bill. What else is rude is when we welcomed you into this community, gave you good advice and then you basically smacked us all in the face by agreeing with someone personally harassing the same people that gave you support.
__________
And I thanked you for your support. You welcomed me, yes you did.
But to make someone feel stupid for wanting another shower isn't right either. We don't know, maybe her house caught flames and all of her old used baby stuff went down with the fire. Maybe she sold some, or gave stuff away to someone with a baby. It's not fair to assume that she's some random knocked up chick wanting and wanting from people.
And I didn't smack you in the face, I did agree with some of the things she said though. Not all of it. But because I love tapped the comment, I got smacked. Not fair really.
That would be absolutely terrible, if that were the case. Let's say that is what happened. The people in her life who care for her are fully aware of the tragedy and following hardship. Should they choose to, they can certainly gift her with items for her new child. Someone's kindness to another person is always welcome and appreciated. Asking for gifts, however, is another creature.
However, I still plan on being here regardless of what the regular ladies think. I understand where both sides come from. But apparently, that's NOT okay in the "regs handbook."
----- Troll, troll, troll...
___________________ Lol that's what you consider trolling? Sorry you feel this way
I come from where more than one shower is considered beyond trashy and greedy. For being such a wealthy person (I pay for my own shit) I don't get how people could afford a shower for every baby. Let's see, on average a shower gift is $50. Just babies from my first cousins, there are 23 so far. Then I've been to five showers of second cousins that are close. Then there's a shower for coworkers and friends. Not to mention bridal showers. You have way more money than I do...unless you're saying that you want a gift for every baby, but don't give one for every baby born in your family, at work, and in your circle of friends.
However, I still plan on being here regardless of what the regular ladies think. I understand where both sides come from. But apparently, that's NOT okay in the "regs handbook."
----- Troll, troll, troll...
___________________ Lol that's what you consider trolling? Sorry you feel this way
TROLLING "To make a deliberately offensive or provocative online posting with the aim of upsetting someone or eliciting an angry response from them." So you're upset that I said I'm not going anywhere?
OP, you mentioned you loaned out all your baby stuff to friends. Could you not just ask for it back? That seems easier and cheaper than throwing a whole party for yourself.
ETA I am a FTM and the majority of my big stuff is hand-me-downs. I would have no problem giving that stuff back to the original owners if they asked for it. In fact I would rather do that than buy them something new.
However, I still plan on being here regardless of what the regular ladies think. I understand where both sides come from. But apparently, that's NOT okay in the "regs handbook."
----- Troll, troll, troll...
___________________ Lol that's what you consider trolling? Sorry you feel this way
TROLLING "To make a deliberately offensive or provocative online posting with the aim of upsetting someone or eliciting an angry response from them." So you're upset that I said I'm not going anywhere?
How old are you? ______________________ I was JUST about you ask the same.
I'm not gonna waste my whole pregnancy arguing on this board. It's so pathetic. And YOU ask ME how old I am? End it. It's done. I'm added to your shit list. Yaaaay!
Here's the main point when you are on baby number 3 regardless the people who want to buy you gifts for your baby will buy them for you regardless if you have a shower or not. So how about registering for gifts that you really really need. That way if someone asks what you need and insists on getting you a gift you can direct them to your registry so they can decide what they can afford. I would imagine going that route would be much cheaper on your end than throwing yourself a shower. Then when the baby is born you can go and use the money you would have spent on a shower to get the other things you really need. Don't be shy ask people if they have any items you need that you can borrow. Post it on Facebook or something. I would rather help out a friend by giving them my hand me downs then buying them another gift for yet another baby. I would totally have more respect for someone who asked me for my spare baby stuff then someone who gave me an invite to their 3rd shower.
Mother to Joelle (13), Jaxen (3) and Jayla (due 5/6)
However, I still plan on being here regardless of what the regular ladies think. I understand where both sides come from. But apparently, that's NOT okay in the "regs handbook."
----- Troll, troll, troll...
___________________ Lol that's what you consider trolling? Sorry you feel this way
TROLLING "To make a deliberately offensive or provocative online posting with the aim of upsetting someone or eliciting an angry response from them." So you're upset that I said I'm not going anywhere?
How old are you?
______________________ I was JUST about you ask the same.
That's funny because I haven't interacted with you on this thread the whole time. I'm 28, I'm not going to dodge the question.
_____________________ Awesome! and I'm 22, married and completely independent since we're getting personal now. So was there a reason upon asking me my age after I stated the meaning of trolling?
O.k. - I'm confused. What does your last baby being a boy and this one is a girl have to do with anything? Are they not both human w/ 2 arms, 2 legs, a head and a torso that will fit in the SAME clothes? Or fit in the same car seat? Or be able to use the same high chair???
Seriously. Why can't your baby girl use the stuff you had for your boy?
I kinda feel bad for the OP. Some people were a bit harsh. I think that hosting your third shower comes off as tacky. I know that having a baby is a big financial cost. Yes, the baby shower will help you out for the first year but the cost of raising a child for their lifetime is exponentially higher. Even though I don't agree, if you want a third shower, I suggest giving the money to your mom and let her host and plan the shower. But I would be cautious in even having another shower because it can rub a lot of people the wrong way
I'm curious OP @cece3d and @MissRissX3, would it be cool for me to throw a huge party every year, register for a years worth of food, clothing, and education expenses just because I'm not rick and snobby? I mean, this kid was a bit of a surprise and I'm not 100% ready for the next 18+ years of clothing, feeding, and providing for this kid so others should have to pony up and support us right?
I'm really not opposed to multiple showers, I am opposed to throwing them yourself and acting entitled to a shower. A shower, of any kind, is a gift someone else gives you not an expectation. No one is entitled to a shower, gifts, or attention just because your uterus is doing what it was made for and growing offspring.
Re: Registry and Baby Showers.
It's like high school in here. Might as well play my part and stick up for the OP. (With good reason) ..
I thought you all added me to the "naughty list". Yeah I'll be okay over here away from the snark. I appreciated all of the comments I've gotten from my posts, but when I agreed with an OP last time, I got my head chewed off and told I couldn't agree with both parties of the argument. How childish..
And I thanked you for your support. You welcomed me, yes you did.
But to make someone feel stupid for wanting another shower isn't right either. We don't know, maybe her house caught flames and all of her old used baby stuff went down with the fire. Maybe she sold some, or gave stuff away to someone with a baby. It's not fair to assume that she's some random knocked up chick wanting and wanting from people.
And I didn't smack you in the face, I did agree with some of the things she said though. Not all of it. But because I love tapped the comment, I got smacked. Not fair really.
I don't pick sides.
Not in my nature.
Honestly, when it comes to social etiquette, I'm of the opinion that you can technically do whatever you want.. Only you know your audience. However- don't be surprised if no one shows up, people talk behind your back, etc.
Lol that's what you consider trolling?
Sorry you feel this way
"To make a deliberately offensive or provocative online posting with the aim of upsetting someone or eliciting an angry response from them."
So you're upset that I said I'm not going anywhere?
ETA I am a FTM and the majority of my big stuff is hand-me-downs. I would have no problem giving that stuff back to the original owners if they asked for it. In fact I would rather do that than buy them something new.
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Married & TTC 9/10/11
Me: Mild PCOS, DH: Morph ~1%
Medicated Cycles (6/12-11/12) = BFN
IUI #1 w/Clomid & trigger (12/12) = BFP, MMC @ 6wks
IUI #2 w/Clomid & trigger (4/13) = BFN
IUI #3 w/Clomid & trigger (5/13) = BFN
IUI #4 w/Follistim, Clomid & trigger (7/13) = BFN
IVF #1 w/fresh single 5D embryo (10/13) = BFN
FET #1 w/two 5D embryos (12/13) = BFP, chemical pregnancy
FET #2 w/two 5D embryos (2/14) = BFN
IVF #2 w/CCS ER (5/14), Freeze all = 16 5-day embyros, only 6 w/normal chromosomes
FET #3 w/single 5D embryo (7/14) = BFN
FET #4 w/single 5D embryo (9/2) = BFP!!!
______________________
I was JUST about you ask the same.
_____________________
Awesome!
Seriously. Why can't your baby girl use the stuff you had for your boy?