Jealous Babies???

Re: Jealous Babies???

• ashiscute member

  January 2015

  First I'd tell her that her opinion is negative and irrelevant and to keep it to herself.
  
  Second mine are 19.5 mos apart and DD showed no jealousy when DS was born. She was pretty indifferent towards him really. We made sure we kept her routine as normal as possible and took turns doing special things with just her. Also, visitors greeted her first and grandparents took her out for special play time. Most of my friends who have 2 under 2 IRL have not experienced jealousy either.
  
  Congrats btw!

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• rovingminstrel member

  January 2015

  My two are 13.5 months apart, so my DD was definitely littler than your son, so this might not apply so well. But for what it's worth, I've noticed jealousy in DD at most two times...and DS is 5mos old now. She didn't really think too much of him when he first came home (was more interested in the balloon that came home, too), but after a few weeks of constant "Gentle!!" corrections, her favorite activity was kissing him. The hardest part was that she didn't understand why I couldn't read books to her when I was nursing him or hold her when I was holding him - but she never got mad at him, just at me. But she got over that probably within a month or so once she realized he was a part of the family, too. She would giggle so much whenever I held both of them. Now she adores him and whenever I offer to read books to her, she runs over to him and tries to pick him up so he can 'read' with us. His first smile was for her. She has always mothered him, and comes running to me yelling "baby, baby!" whenever he cries and I don't respond right away. She taught him how to roll over. She's his favorite person, and vice versa. She'll refuse a kiss to Daddy or Mamma if she's angry, but never to "Cob Cob". He's often her first waking thought, and she always wants to know where he is and that he's ok.

  
  

  So, all that to say - you haven't wronged your son by giving him a little sibling so soon. It'll take a little work, and a little explaining, and a whole lot of loving, but your son will learn to love and accept Baby. And Baby will love your son, too. The work is hard, but the dividends are huge!! You got this.

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• kajordan09 member

  January 2015

  Mine are almost 21 months apart. The first few weeks went really well. He really took to his younger brother. My family visited in those first few weeks and I made a big point for them to give special attention to DS#1.  I think once the visiting family left and it was just us, it started to get harder on DS#1. He started noticing the attention more on his younger brother, so he started acting out. Once I noticed that, I made MUCH more of an effort to give DS#1 special attention and tried to include him as much as I could with caring for DS#2. I would plan one on one time with DS#1 here and there, and fully took advantage when DS#2 napped.  Now that my boys are 3 and 18 months, they are great friends. DS#2 is talking and fully mobile so DS#1 is having the best time playing with him and having a 24/7 buddy. It's been awesome to see their relationship blossom. In fact, now that I'm expecting #3, DS#1 told me he hopes the baby is just like DS#2 - and he's so excited!!

  
  

  
  

  
  

  

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• vettymama member

  January 2015

  Congratulations! And don't listen to other (IRL) peoples comments! I think small age gaps are awesome. 

  
  

  My boys are a little less than 17 months apart. DS1 didn't show any jealousy or even a change in his routine when we brought DS2 home. It has a lot to do with the individual child. I made sure to still have lots of 1 on 1 time with DS1 when DS2 was napping or content on an activity mat, etc. Also I praised DS2 for being such a great big brother. It's all an adjustment period but everyone will get the hang of the new normal. 

  

  
  

  
  

  

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• MrsStanger member

  January 2015

  Just did the math and DD is 22 MO and DS is 2 MO ( 18 Month difference..im stating the obvious because i didnt realize it lol)

  Anyways DD just always wants to help. i cant say she is jealous yet but i make sure my DH and i are dating her ( Taking her out for special time on her own). She loves DS so much that when i get them from the sitter she cries until he is in the truck with us...every family is different

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• Hugheser2014 member

  February 2015

  My LO is 14 weeks old, and my husband and I are already thinking of TTC #2 in the next few months or so.  We like the idea of close spacing, but it seems like everyone has an opinion about it.  How do you guys deal with all of the unsolicited advice and opinions? I know that most people probably mean well, but it makes me feel bad when people call it "reckless" and "not fair to the first child"...

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• loeroam member

  February 2015

  My kids are 18 months apart and we haven't seen any jealousy issues with our oldest.  In fact, he LOVES doing things for his brother and gets mad if he can't help give his brother a bath, eat, change diapers, etc.  I have noticed though, that when I do get 1:1 time with my oldest, he is more clingy that before the baby came home.  There has been an uptick in "up please" and "cuddle me". Mine are 23mos and 5 mos and the way they interact amazes me.  Don't let anyone tell you that you are doing the wrong thing.
  

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