Leaving 17 month old overnight with grandparents

Silverlining2011 · January 2015

Hey there- wanted to get some feedback from anyone who has left their toddler and gone away for a few nights. My husband and I are planning to go away (just a few hours by car) for 3 nights and leave our daughter who will be 17 mos with my parents (who she knows and sees monthly). She sleeps through the night and is weaned, so they should be able to theoretically stick to our routine. They have cared for her before while i've been at work and she naps and does everything she normally does with them. i work 3 days a week and we have a nanny that watches her normally on those days, so she is used to spending some time away from me. We've stayed at my parents house before too and she's been able to sleep there no problem in a travel crib. Also, since we'll be close, we could easily come back if things were going poorly.

I really think it's important for my husband and I to get away and reconnect but as it gets closer I'm getting nervous. He's actually more nervous than I am and I don't think he really wants to do it, but I really think we should. I also think it would be a nice time for my parents to get to bond with her, because often, when i'm around and we're all together, she doesn't want to go to my mom, she wants to be with me, but when i'm gone, she is happy and playful with my mom.

Thoughts? Anyone already do this? How did your LO do?

thanks in advance!

ashiscute · January 2015

Is this your first time leaving her overnight period? It is tough. My DD was 16 months the first time she slept over with my parents but it was one night and DH and I were at home 20 minutes away.

The first time I left them for a getaway was this summer we went away for 2 nights and they spent one night with each parent. DD was 3.5 and DS was weeks any of his 2nd birthday. They did really well and had a great time. Go and enjoy yourselves. It's normal to worry but it's good for everyone to get a break.

erinmc1 · January 2015

We had a couple mandatory military retreats when our son was about your daughter's age, that would have required us to put him in daycare all day for 3 days straight, so we opted to leave him with our parents. It was definitely harder on us than it was on him. He loved the extended spoiling.

rspalding001 · January 2015

The first time is the hardest! Sounds like you already know all the reasons why you should still go based on your first paragraph. Just make sure you give your parents enough guidance to feel comfortable and know that they can call you with questions if they need to. You deserve a break!

ahbEsq · January 2015

My DS never sticks to a schedule and sleeps poorly when he stays with my in laws but everyone has a blast. It was hard on me leaving him the first time but we all survived. It's been great for DH and me, my in laws love it, and DS has so much fun. Go have a good time.

Silverlining2011 · January 2015

Thanks everyone so much for the replies. It makes me feel better!! I was having irrational thoughts like i was going to scar her for life after reading some posts on the internet!

thanks again!!

valeriegp · January 2015

My son stays overnight with his grandparent's about once a month and he has since he was about 6 months old. Now, they are tight! His Grandpa is his bff, and Grammy runs a close second. I absolutely love the relationship they have built.

Twice he has stayed with them more than one night. The first time was for 3 nights but it was a little too much for my parents (they are in their mid-60s and my mom has bad knees). I think he was about 13 or 14 months then but I can remember. He recently (2 months ago?) stayed with them for 2 nights and it was fine. My mom said that she thought they could probably do 3 nights now that he is older. But, by the end of that third day (when he stayed 2 nights) he was ready to go home.

I say that since you will only be a few hours away by car, you should go for it. If it doesn't go well, you can always hop in the car and drive home.

Designermomma · January 2015

We just left our 13 month old with the grandparents last night for the first time. It went great! They texted everything he was doing and sent pictures of him eating breakfast. No worries! I didn't real use how much we needed a break until we got one. Enjoy!

kimmee1997 · January 2015

Ds1 is 4 and stays with either set of grandparents quite often and has since a little over a year old. Ds2 is 12 months and he stayed with my husbands parents early this month and it went fine, I guess. I was more worried that ds2 would be too rough on them and they wouldn't want to keep him again because he has been such a horrible sleeper. I think he kept them up because there are no requests for him to spend the night again. And my mother won't keep him either because she knows how bad of a sleeper he is. So no break for us in the near future.

I would say go off and enjoy yourselves. Your baby will be fine. Enjoy the break, especially when you have family offering to help!

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