Work Shower Ettiquite

Re: Work Shower Ettiquite

• stephaniesee member

  January 2015

  I wouldn't invite administration if I were you, just from working closely with school administrators some of them don't go to those sort of things and those that do never feel comfortable. However, I don't know what they're like in your school.... Id stick with those you're close with.

  

     
  

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• VOR member

  January 2015

  Is this shower going to be after hours away from the school?  to  me, it makes a difference.
  
  if "yes", then yes, keep the list to the people you are close to, see out side of work.  "no" to administration.  Even though a "work" shower, if it's after hours, that takes it more into the  "personal" realm.
  
  if it's going to be during work hours and at the school, then that's a little dicier and I do think opens you up more to people feeling excluded if not invited.  These kinds of showers, though, tend to be a LOT less formal.  Usually just an hour, usually a group gift, and people can stop in at their leisure over that hour for some cake. 
  

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• JNCPro3130 member

  January 2015

  @VOR‌ and @etoille‌, the shower is right after school (3:15), but it is at school in our media center. What do you think? @MandJS, That's what I originally thought. I wasn't sure if it taking place at work changed things. Thanks!

  
  

  
  
  

  
  
  
  

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• dufferoo member

  January 2015

  I've never heard of an on-site work shower where the whole staff wasn't invited, but then I've never worked at a large place of employment like you. I feel like this setup does put you in an awkward position, and I wish the ladies hosting just wrote their own guest list or made it a surprise or something, but since they didn't... I think the way to avoid over-inviting is to keep the guest list verrry small and intimate, like maybe your 4 work BFFs. Otherwise it's hard to know where to draw the line, right? Then if one of the assistant principals is like "I can't believe you didn't tell me about your shower!" you can be like, "Oh my gosh, it was the tiniest thing ever! Just me and Sandy and the secretaries" or whatever.

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• chicagojackie member

  January 2015

  Am I the only one completely distracted by the fact OP states she's a teacher and then cannot spell etiquette?

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• VOR member

  January 2015

  dufferoo said:

  I feel like this setup does put you in an awkward position

  Yup.  O.k. - so, these other women you used to work with - how often do you see them and actually talk to them?  Have they expressed excitement over your pregnancy? 

  I do feel like it being onsite means you can add in a few people you may not have otherwise, but still.... I would be very cautious.  If you see/talk to these women fairly regularly, they may like to be invited.  but if you pretty much never see them anymore - they may wonder why they were invited.  Who knows- it could go either way.

  I still would not invite your bosses. 
  

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• RibbitGrl930 member

  January 2015

  DaisyBlinks said:

  I'm surprised that there's not already a 'norm' in place at a school for baby showers. 

  
  

  I'd consider 3:15 to be part of the work day, even though the kids go home. Aren't most teachers still in the building at that time? I'd think it's a little weird to use the break room for a private party when other people might be going in and out.  

  
  

  I mean, at places where I've worked, Baby Showers are just kind of an excuse to have cake at work and everyone's invited. A collection is taken up and you can give whatever you see fit (I collected for a coworker recently and $5 was about the average, but not everyone even contributed and that was fine). That's kind of what I thought was normal for work parties.

  
  Yup. When I taught at an elementary school, my bridal shower was pretty much a "Come one, come all" event where cake and punch was served in the cafeteria, and each grade level pooled their money together for a team gift. The same was true of baby showers. Not everybody went, but everybody was invited. It would have been odd for only a few people to have been invited.

   

  

   

  
  

  
  

   

   

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• JNCPro3130 member

  January 2015

  RibbitGrl930 said:

  DaisyBlinks said:

  I'm surprised that there's not already a 'norm' in place at a school for baby showers. 

  
  

  I'd consider 3:15 to be part of the work day, even though the kids go home. Aren't most teachers still in the building at that time? I'd think it's a little weird to use the break room for a private party when other people might be going in and out.  

  
  

  I mean, at places where I've worked, Baby Showers are just kind of an excuse to have cake at work and everyone's invited. A collection is taken up and you can give whatever you see fit (I collected for a coworker recently and $5 was about the average, but not everyone even contributed and that was fine). That's kind of what I thought was normal for work parties.

  
  Yup. When I taught at an elementary school, my bridal shower was pretty much a "Come one, come all" event where cake and punch was served in the cafeteria, and each grade level pooled their money together for a team gift. The same was true of baby showers. Not everybody went, but everybody was invited. It would have been odd for only a few people to have been invited.

  This would certainly make things easier; however, our staff is so large that we would be meeting for baby showers, bridal showers, or other celebrations all the time!  Right now, there are 5 of us pregnant and 2 that had their babies already.  We have also had 2 ladies get married this year, so we would have had to have 9 showers this year alone.  We do a staff party for Teacher of the Year and any retirements.  Every grade level I have worked with has always thrown the baby shower for the person on their team.  I do understand why our administration team does it the way they do... even though it is uncomfortable to make the list.  As others have said, I will treat it as an out of school shower.

  
  

  @chicagojackie, please excuse my misspelling!  I read your post and thought, "How do you spell etiquette?"  Gotta love typos.  As a teacher, I tell my 3rd graders to proof read. Maybe I should take my own advice.   ">

  
  

  
  
  

  
  
  
  

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• JNCPro3130 member

  January 2015

  RibbitGrl930 said:

  DaisyBlinks said:

  I'm surprised that there's not already a 'norm' in place at a school for baby showers. 

  
  

  I'd consider 3:15 to be part of the work day, even though the kids go home. Aren't most teachers still in the building at that time? I'd think it's a little weird to use the break room for a private party when other people might be going in and out.  

  
  

  I mean, at places where I've worked, Baby Showers are just kind of an excuse to have cake at work and everyone's invited. A collection is taken up and you can give whatever you see fit (I collected for a coworker recently and $5 was about the average, but not everyone even contributed and that was fine). That's kind of what I thought was normal for work parties.

  
  Yup. When I taught at an elementary school, my bridal shower was pretty much a "Come one, come all" event where cake and punch was served in the cafeteria, and each grade level pooled their money together for a team gift. The same was true of baby showers. Not everybody went, but everybody was invited. It would have been odd for only a few people to have been invited.

  I'm just curious.  How large was the staff?  I've only worked at this school, so I don't know how other schools work these things.

  
  

  
  
  

  
  
  
  

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