things the same at both houses?

Re: things the same at both houses?

• Ilumine member

  January 2015

  Expand on your question.  Do you mean consistency in expectations, rules and the corresponding consequences and punishments or do you you mean the minutia?

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• christieb27 member

  January 2015

  The biggest thing we keep consistent from house to house is my Step sons bedtime. We also have the same basic meal times- but we will stray if we are busy.

  Otherwise we bring up issues week by week- she notices a new behavior or we do we just make sure to communicate so we can approach the behavior the same.

  
  

  
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• alb2411 member

  January 2015

  Ideally, both houses would be on the same page at least as far as discipline and expectations (school, chores, etc) are concerned. Unfortunately, in my situation, the other house hardly communicates with ours about visitation and medical concerns, so being on the same page is not going to happen any time soon. When my SS notices these differences and says "At mommy's I can XYZ" we simply remind him that he is not at mommy's right now and ABC is the rule at our house instead.

  
  

  If you have a good relationship with the other household, I think it would be great to be on the same page about as much as possible. If you don't have a good relationship, just make sure the child understands the rules at your house and be consistent with them without badmouthing the rules (or lack thereof) at the other home. 

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