guilt over stopping pumping

blondie10m · January 2015

DS1 was not into nursing once he started table food (it was actually really challenging to get him to nurse at all after 9 months) so he weaned himself easily at 14 months and I felt no guilt because it was his decision (I stopped pumping at work at 12.5 months). But DS2 is totally different and seems to enjoy nursing more. But after pumping at work for 9 months (he just turned one year) and constantly cleaning pump parts and bottles and managing my freezer stash, I feel like it just consumed my life, both at work and at home. I want to be done and wean off the pump at work but I feel really guilty because I know my supply will go way down and he will pretty much only get to nurse twice a day since we get home from daycare so late, I basically have time to throw together a quick dinner and then it's his bedtime. Even on weekends, I feel like I'm still tied to him since I have to make sure I'm home to nurse him before both naps so I can't leave the house for the day ever but I would like to get out on my own occasionally. It's been rough on our marriage as well since I feel like I have no free time to hang out since I'm always nursing or getting bottles for the next day or exhausted from night nursing (I want to night wean as well, which is making me feel guilty too).

I just feel like if I stop pumping at work, I am not doing what is in the best interest of DS2, especially with the remainder of the cold and flu season ahead of us. But I need to for my sanity and work productivity. He is starting to drink whole milk out of a straw cup and seems to do okay so far while I am cutting out one bottle a week at daycare. Did anyone else have feelings like this? How did you work through it? How did your supply hold up if you only nursed twice a day on weekdays? Did the lower supply upset your LO?

vvvvvfee · January 2015

i think you're being way too hard on yourself! making it to a year in and of itself is great. stopping pumping is such a relief. your supply should be fine, and your LO will still be getting all the benefits of BM, including immunity benefits, even if you are only nursing a couple of times per day.

quitting pumping left me so much more relaxed and less harried, and i enjoyed nursing a great deal more during the 2nd year. i stopped at 14 months, and still had plenty of milk for DS for over a year. i was down to 1 pump a day at that point, so i was really only cutting back from 4 nursing sessions/pumps per day to 3. my supply has started to decrease now that i am 12 weeks pregnant, but i had more than enough to satisfy DS for his entire second year of nursing. on weekdays i generally nursed 3x a day (morning wakeup, after work, and before bed), and on weekends pretty much on demand, usually around 4-6 times.

can your H take over some of the naptime duty, so you don't feel pressured to be home at certain times?

mmooki · January 2015

I stopped pumping at work when dd turned 1. We were able to continue nursing as she wanted until she was 22 months. No issues with supply as far as I could tell.

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