Has your SO been alone with your little one yet?

missnacholover · January 2015

Carebella · January 2015

How do we define alone? Does bring outside the house to bring in the trash cans while he is inside count? Otherwise, nope! It's more about me not wanting to be away yet with LO generally nursing every hour on the hour during the day.

sweetbabyrahe · January 2015

I've gone out for a few hours here and there to get my hair done so he has LO for a few hours. I usually time it so I'm back before he has to eat again. DH is also a second time dad who is alone with ds1 all the time.

mrsransom · January 2015

Yes. I went back to my part time job this week teaching Zumba while he kept the baby. I also went Christmas shopping alone a couple times. I don't BF & we share in all duties when we're both here, so it's no big deal to leave it all to him.

BridgetThoams · January 2015

Once while LO was sleeping I ran to the store. H went downstairs to eat and forgot LO was there! Went back up to find a screaming baby 15 minutes later. He felt terrible!

TC0514 · January 2015

I've left him for an hour here and there but usually no more than 30min

smboswell1 · January 2015

My SO and I don't live together, so I'm always around when he is visiting Beckham and I. He was left alone once when Beckham was 2 weeks old. I had to run to the store!

carafern · January 2015

Only a couple hours at a time, a few times.

rinaealy · January 2015

When I took DD to the dentist so he had DS for a few hours. However he will be the one taking DS to his Mom's house when I go back to work. He is pretty competent >:D<

kstirton · January 2015

I've left him quite a few times. When I go back to work in 4 weeks he will be off 7 weekd alone with her. I'm thankful for that bc it means she won't be in daycare until she's about 4.5 months and it gives them a chance one on one to bond.

bumpuser10336873 · January 2015

I've been out 2 or 3 times on my own, just for 2 hrs each time...that's as long as I can go since I'm bf & pumping. DH has been fine with LO while I've been gone, but always tells me not to stay away too long. He'll have to get over that, I'm back to work next week and he'll be alone with her every Saturday - I'll be gone from 6am-8.30pm or later depending on how late i get stuck at work.

vv101010 · January 2015

Only while I take a shower and then LO is right back to me. I want them to bond more and then have some time to do something for myself! But she is absolutely inconsolable by him.

BrianneG78 · January 2015

Three times so far, but two of them, she was asleep the whole time. He's going to be doing it more though now that I'm going back to my part-time tutoring job three days/week. It's only a few hours but he'll have to feed her twice each time.

MrsAdventure · January 2015

Even before Pips was born, I had a trip planned to a giant Christmas bazaar with my girlfriends. She was 2 weeks old when I went. I did this on purpose for both DH and I. When I go back to work in Febuary, DH will be with Pips for 4 to 8 hours a day without me 4 to 5 days a week. And I knew if I didn't start the trend quickly, all three of us would be a mess. DH does not want to be a SAHD, but until his back gets fixed, he's elected by default since he cannot work. Since then, at least once a week I go out for a a bit. Except since the new year. My grandmother has gotten worse (crazy alztimers stuff) and I feel bad making him watch both 'kids' when grandma can be a bigger handful than the baby.

The hardest thing for me is that DH doesn't do things as I do them, but I knew this, which is why we tried to make me leaving a normal thing. So I wouldn't have a melt down in Febuary. I still will, I'm sure, but it won't be for lack of trying

AngelaL814 · January 2015

G has stayed with DH twice now. Once for 3 hrs and last night for 1.5 while I took a break and went to the gym. He's a LEO and because his schedule rotates, he will be home with her 2-3 days a week when I go back to work. Hopefully this will help her be more comfortable with him. When I was sick Monday with the flu, I slept in SD's room so as not to get G sick. She wasn't having that, and wouldn't go to sleep for DH. I ended up in a mask and gloves rocking a panicked child to sleep at 1am

mander82 · January 2015

I am sure you all have read my story from DH's first day flying solo. He failed miserably......we are going to try again on Tuesday. LO has been better the past few days, but I still expect him to have a rough day every now and again.

I feel alot better about my situation after reading how many of your SO's haven't been alone with your LO yet. I do the timing it right thing too, so that if I go for groceries, I will rush back home before he wakes up to eat again. Here I was thinking I was the only crazy person doing such things.

Dumbgurl04 · January 2015

DH has had a few times here or there when I have gone out to get us food or went to the store. He has also had a few longer times when I went to go see movies or have dinner with a friend. Although at Christmas he did have 2 full days with her. One day went great the other I had to come home early from work because "She keeps crying and I don't know what else to do because she is feed and changed"

soulcupcake · January 2015

He's been alone with all four kids for no longer than a hour so that I could go to my midwife appt. and get groceries. That's only happened a couple times.

thedjinn88 · January 2015

I have left my little with my SO for workouts or Christmas shopping, but I have learned not to anymore lol He doesn't pick him up when he starts crying, he waits till the child is screaming bloody freakin murder and I don't think my son is old enough to let cry till that point.

songbirdsinging55 · January 2015

We just started our new routine. DH watches LO when I am working on Thursday and Friday for about 9 hours. Yesterday was his first planned day with him. When I was in the ER, he watched him all day but that was a surprise visit so he was not prepared. Luckily I always have an emergency stash of formula just in case I can't nurse him. He is very good with him.

jessa1228 · January 2015

Yes - a bunch of little times (while I shower, put away laundry, clean, etc) and twice for about 3 hours while I went to various appts/ran errands. He gave a bottle and I pumped when I got home.

I have to say, I'm surprised at the amount of people who haven't.

missnacholover · January 2015

DH has been alone with DD lots. For an hour or two here and there, a few long afternoons while I've gone shopping or had doctor's appointments. He's going to be alone with her all day most days next week, *evil laugh*. The first time I left him alone with her was when she was 9 days old to run to BuyBuyBaby, haha.

ETA: She is bottle fed so it makes it easier to leave her alone for longer periods!

Jpinky9 · January 2015

DH has only been left alone with DS once, last Saturday, I ran out to get some groceries. DS is EBF so it's me who usually does the primary care. We have yet to pump and bottle feed. I fed DS and he was asleep in his swing when I left, when I got back he was awake and hungry again. DH is great with him and has no problem being alone with him or hands on. It's me who does not want to be away from DS. I am sure that will change at some point, but with being off for a whole year I don't have to rush into leaving him.

kcar1105 · January 2015

I went to the post office once while LO was with H...that's it.

staugustinewedding · January 2015

WildFlower810 said:
In the other room at night or while I am napping, yes. Once when I ran to the store, but LO slept the whole time. So... About as much as I would expect from a SO that works, a sahm, and an ebf baby.

This too!

misterdonut · January 2015

Whenever I come back from a two hour outing ("go out! Enjoy yourself, I've got this!") I come back to a drained, exhausted, want to die expression.

jac409 · January 2015

Only once so I could run to the post office. I was probably gone for 25 minutes and LO slept the whole time. My two year old was also napping at the time. He was terrified that they would both wake up before I came back. I almost wanted that to happen, just so he would have a small taste of what my days are like. Even if it was only for ten minutes.

Kristil2014 · January 2015

I have been able to sneak away for a couple hours at a time. LO is FF, so I can be away for longer periods of time.

silverwings72 · January 2015

Econosaurus said:
I dug deep and found my lady balls today.

Over breakfast I announced that after I have showered immediately after one of his feedings I'm going out for 1.5-2 hours and will return when he needs to eat.

Hopefully this actually happens.

Good for you! You deserve it.

Maelara · January 2015

I've been out and about a couple times and have BOTH children with him. He did great

mamaluzi · January 2015

Hubby has been alone with LO for short times when I've been home, but only twice when I've gone out. Once when she was about 2-3 weeks old and she slept the whole time, and as for the other time...well, let me share this story I posted in another thread to tell you how that went:

I went on a movie "date" with my dad the other night and DH offered to watch Norah. 10 min after I get to the restaurant before the movies, I get a phone call..."she's inconsolable! What do I do?" Ugh. So first thing I say is that she's probably hungry, since I had fed her roughly 2 hours before. He says she refused the bottle - she'd just suck for a few seconds and then cry. Ok. So I suggest perhaps trying a different bottle - maybe she doesn't like the nipple on the one you're using. He says he'll try switching over. Great.
I get a text a 1/2 hour later: "she wanted a cuddle and a nap!" Ok, cool.
2 hours later: "she's eaten a grand total of .5 oz." WHAT. No way, she hasn't eaten in like 4-5 hours at this point...she's probably starving! I text back saying just that...he finds out that the bottle he'd been trying to use was CLOGGED THE WHOLE TIME. And no, he didn't switch it over earlier like he said he would. Poor baby was super hungry for the whole time I'd been out and had given up and fallen asleep

I almost started crying in the theatre.
I get home and she's fed but not in bed like she's supposed to be. Instead she's over tired and fussy, "swaddled" (arms out, which doesn't work for her - "this swaddle isn't big enough I don't think it works" - I fixed it) and still in her daytime clothes because DH "couldn't find her PJs." Um, honey, there is 1 drawer that is ONLY PJs and I specifically showed it to you before I left. But of course, when I had tried to tell him anything to prepare him for the evening, I got interrupted by the "I can do it, I have instincts too, I'm her father, just go have a good time" speech. *facepalm*
He felt really bad about the evening, though. I know he tries and cares very much, so I'm grateful for that, of course...hopefully he'll get the hang of things for next time, but my God...so frustrating!

kfo22 · January 2015

@Econosaurus‌ How did it go?

Mine hasn't, and he refuses to change diapers, so... who knows when he ever will. Oh well.

venussapphire · January 2015

Maybe 3+ times a week I go out by myself or with DD1.

venussapphire · January 2015

kfo22 said:

@Econosaurus‌ How did it go? Mine hasn't, and he refuses to change diapers, so... who knows when he ever will. Oh well.

I think this is totally f'd up @kfo22 . I also don't understand how you allow this. It is his kid too.

runningmama14 · January 2015

I went back to work this week and dh wasn't busy at work and got off early a few days, so they boys time for a few hours those days. Today he had him for several hours since I work Saturday as well.

kfo22 · January 2015

venussapphire said:

kfo22 said:

@Econosaurus‌ How did it go?

Mine hasn't, and he refuses to change diapers, so... who knows when he ever will. Oh well.

I think this is totally f'd up @kfo22 . I also don't understand how you allow this. It is his kid too.

His dad was the same way, and wasn't around much either. He at least helps with everything else as much as he can

missnacholover · January 2015

I absolutely would not stand for DH to "refuse" to change diapers. I seriously would rage.

missnacholover · January 2015

Econosaurus said:

I absolutely would not stand for DH to "refuse" to change diapers. I seriously would rage.
Sometimes it's easier just to do it than wait for him to go put on latex exam gloves. Seriously.

ha! There have been some poops where I've wanted to buy some medical exam gloves to have next to the changing table.

But really, I think if I asked DH to change a diaper (I don't have to ask, Thank God!) and he just said "no", I would probably have steam coming out of my ears. It's just poop. He wipes his own ass, why can't he wipe his child's?

BrianneG78 · January 2015

What? Mine won't use the cloth diapers but he always jumps up to change her into a disposable.

babysis013 · January 2015

I don't hesitate to leave him home with his daddy. I did the grocery shopping today and just kissed them both and left. We share the responsibilities so Daddy knows everything I do. Daddy changed all but one diaper in the hospital. Grandma changed the one daddy didn't. The trade off is he doesn't hear the baby fussing in the night and it takes him about half an hour to wake up enough to be functional, so I take nearly all the overnight feedings.

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