Baby shower help!!!

soontobemrsmccall · January 2015

We recently moved to Hawaii but We will be having our baby shower back in California. How can I politely remind people in lieu of gifts that we still have to fly home.

I feel tacky and rude to ask for gift cards but I also want to remind everyone asking people to ship big gifts to Hawaii is basically telling them to pay for the gift twice because shipping to Hawaii is sooo expensive. Any advice in wording for the invite?

-mermama

elbowpasta · January 2015

Erm... To be honest, I don't think there is a way for you to do it that's not tacky. Something like that should DEFINITELY not go on the invite, but I don't know what's wrong with the host answering questions from guests when asked (not providing the information spontaneously) about your preferences...

angielayne926 · January 2015

Unfortunately, you can't really ask people to spend their money on certain things. I have seen it on the invite from the host as a reminder that the couple lives somewhere else, but it's really up to the person what they want to buy.

IMO, if they know you well enough, they will know that you will be flying home after the shower and will take that in to consideration. You may have to ship a box or two back, though, so just be prepared.

elbowpasta · January 2015

And, if your guests try to ship it to HI, they'll see soon enough how much it costs, and might opt to just send a gift card instead. I don't think you need to tell them that.

leenziepops · January 2015

soontobemrsmccall said:

We recently moved to Hawaii but We will be having our baby shower back in California. How can I politely remind people in lieu of gifts that we still have to fly home. I feel tacky and rude to ask for gift cards but I also want to remind everyone asking people to ship big gifts to Hawaii is basically telling them to pay for the gift twice because shipping to Hawaii is sooo expensive. Any advice in wording for the invite? -mermama

Just get the host to organise the guests and remind them that you need to fly back. I wouldn't put it in the invite. I'm not a fan of invites that include instructions on how to gift people unless it's just a one liner of where the registry is.

Disneygeek77 · January 2015

I would bring an extra suitcase as I would probably feel more comfortable paying for an extra bag than put my guests in an awkward situation.

You could also take everything back to the store and re-buy it once you are home.

soontobemrsmccall · January 2015

Thanks ladies! Everyone has gray advice

soontobemrsmccall · January 2015

Great**

Katerina&Baby · January 2015

I have seen invitations where registry info is printed on a separate insert that goes in with the main invitation. If that's how your hostesses were planning on giving people your registry info, they could also say "Soontobemrsmccall is registered at X and Y. For your reference, please note that her new address is as follows: ...." That way it reminds people that shipping is an option and gives them the information necessary to do that if they choose (without coming out and asking them to ship).

lwyz · January 2015

It's not really rude to address gifts to an extent for a shower, to me anyways. I'm definitely not the expert. But I think @JimBobCooter‌ said it right.

ETA: Not rude to an extent for the hostess, I meant. You, unfortunately, should not address it.

KonaCoffeeBean · January 2015

I think you can do is make sure that you register at a place that's accommodating. For some stores they won't charge you shipping if you ship to your local store so that would be ideal.

MCRM14 · January 2015

For our wedding we had a few gifts people had shipped to our house (well my inlaws) and it was just them buying online when it offers you the mailing address you put the recipients address

awheeler4311 · January 2015

We didn't have a registry for our wedding because it was destination, but mostly bc we live in a tiny apartment and didn't have storage for the wedding stuff (and we had everything we needed anyway). So we just didn't put anything on the invite as far as registry or gifts, and people got the hint (or asked my parents) to bring a gift card or check/cash.

Not sure if you would be happier with actual gift or with gift cards to purchase stuff on your own?

How about an Amazon.com registry? A lot of people have Amazon prime and you can ship for free. Does that still apply to Hawaii?

I personally don't think it's tacky to ask them to ship to your home because of travel, or opt for a gift card. It's ridiculous for you to have to pay for shipping of huge stuff and I feel like people would understand that. But that's just me and my family is pretty open about that kind of stuff.

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