Baby Showers

Guest List Advice

My hostess asked for advice on the guest list. As I am putting it together I'm torn on a few people who are my MIL's friends (their sons are still DH's best friends, all of which we're groomsmen at our wedding). They came to our wedding and we see them every few months at church, and they were very excited about the baby when we told them.

So should I include them?

My hunch is to include my MIL's best friend, and exclude the others (in total its 4 people).

We can't ask MIL her opinion because my hostess doesn't want her to know about it until she gets the invite. My hostess doesn't want her too involved (she can be a bit crazy and overboard).

I know you all will give me your brutal honest opinion, so invite or no?
BabyFruit Ticker

Re: Guest List Advice

  • Also, a second question. Two of my aunts asked to be invited even though they live out of state. Should I invite the third who also lives out of state (3 hours away)?

    I am leaning towards no, but my family can be super gossipy and I don't want anyone to feel left out.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Hmmmm. Can your hostess accommodate the extra friends of MIL's without taking off anyone that you are close to? That would be the questions from me. If they're close to your MIL and their kids are close to your H, they would probably like an invitation and come to the shower. But, if your hostess can't fit them it, I don't think cutting them is bad.

    As for your aunt, I'd ask my hostess to send an invitation. In my family, my mom is the one who lives far away, and she always appreciates getting invited. Even if she can't come.



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  • VORVOR member
    People being invited to your wedding doesn't play a role here. People can also be be excited for you without being invited to a shower. so, based on that - do you WANT them there, can your host easily accomodate them? If the answer to eithe rof those is "no", then don't invite them. As for your aunts, while I'm usually on the "don't invite OOTers", if you invite 2 aunts, invite the 3rd.
  • I don't think it's a problem accommodating them. My MIL is not hosting in any way. My main concern is that I don't want to seem gift grabby to invite them. I don't see them often and I would essentially be inviting them because of DH and MIL, and because they are their family friends.

    The rest of the invites are made up of 4 of my friends, 3 family friends of my mother, 3 of my cousins, 4 or 5 aunts, all 4 grandmas, 2 sister-in-laws

    So it's mostly family, and so I'm not sure if it's appropriate to include my MIL's friends or if it will just seem gift grabby.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • VORVOR member
    My personal take on showers is that they are supposed to be SMALL, personal events. Not "invite everyone you know", like you do w a wedding. If you hardly see them, don't invite them. If they want to buy you a gift, they will. They don't need a shower to do that.
  • I agree with VOR as I think showers should be small intimate events.  I know I made that mistake with my shower where I invited people I wasn't really close to and felt so embarassed when they didn't show up or even give an RSVP.
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