Getting called "Mama"...

kej0004 · January 2015

Does it seem weird to anyone else when people call you "Mama" (besides your kids, obviously)? People keep seeing me and asking "How's Mama doing?" or "How's my little Mommy feeling today?" or saying "Hang in there, Mom!" and I'm just like....I'm not your mother, why are you calling me that?

Maybe I'm just being crazy because I'm a FTM and it still seems surreal, but it just makes me really uncomfortable.

megtyrrell · January 2015

It made me a little uncomfortable early on when my pregnancy didn't feel real to me yet. But now the idea of being a mother is not a new one and it doesn't feel as awkward when people call me mama.

esampson1983 · January 2015

It's kind of unreal. My nieces got DH I "mom" and "dad" cups at Christmas. As I washed them I turned to DH and was like this is so weird! I've had many titles but mom has never been one till now!

seannemairi · January 2015

Doesn't bother me at all. I also don't mind belly touching at all unless it's a stranger. Just shows my friends and family are excited like I am, which makes me feel loved.

kemdupuis · January 2015

It really annoys me. I also hate the unwanted belly touching and everyone asking me how I am feeling non-stop. I mean, it's fine if my mom asks me that, but it gets annoying whenever anyone calls my office at school and the first thing out of their mouth is "how are you feeling?!"

kej0004 · January 2015

@kemdupuis Getting asked how I feel all the time kind of bothers me, too. It's like everyone has a morbid fascination with whether or not I vomit frequently. I know they're just trying to be nice, but it's not like I'm going to answer truthfully. "Oh, you know, haven't pooped in 4 days, but at least I haven't thrown up in a few days. Now I've got a tampon up my nose because it won't stop bleeding! How are you feeling today?"

carolyngrace · January 2015

I work with kids and automatically call their parents "mom" or "dad" instead of trying to remember and use their names! Always in the presence of the kid, though (for example "what do you think, mom?"). As a FTM this has never happened to me yet, but I think it's probably something you get used to!

hjdaniels0415 · January 2015

I love being called mama, all day everyday. I'm part of the hippie grateful dead culture so being called mama is a sign of love and affection. Now it's just that much sweeter. I guess I'm just overjoyed with all of this and can't wait! It's been an amazing experience so far and this mama loves it!

ksimo6 · January 2015

Doesn't bother me at all.

poppyc8 · January 2015

That would bug me too. Don't like it one bit!

elvinnoe · January 2015

Doesn't bother me. As @hjdaniels0415‌ said, it's an affectionate term in some circles and I'm used to it. The girls I used to work with all called me mama even before I became one lol. I think it's sweet.

hjdaniels0415 · January 2015

@elvinnoe‌ sounds like we would get along great!

leenziepops · January 2015

Only DH uses that but i dont mind. And its always PG related questions. Or when he's talking to LO about me. I love that part

BabyList · January 2015

There is a lady at work who constantly calls me mama. I think it's super weird. I don't mind when people call mama, mommy, or mom around my daughter, but in my work setting I just think it's weird.

courtyowl427 · January 2015

Mama is not to bad. If anyone over 8 calls me mommy I might punch them in the face. A lot of people say mama cause they are excited for you.

missjenniebean · January 2015

Very unusual for me. I'm a ftm and found it weird when people did that with my dog. Ha.

mixnmatch372 · January 2015

My dad calls me "mama-bee" sometimes when he asks how I'm doing. I think it's cute. But if others (friends, coworkers, strangers, etc.) started using those phrases, I would have the same reaction. Back off, I'm not your mommy!

kej0004 · January 2015

@missjenniebean I always correct people when people refer to me as my dogs' mom. I OWN them. I care for them and love them to death, but I am not their mother.

You know, maybe I'm just really having a hard time adjusting to this whole motherhood thing.

missjenniebean · January 2015

@kej0004 - haha I still find it weird, she is my baby girl and now my step dad says "hows mama?" When he sees me. I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around the phrase!

paige0704 · January 2015

I cant stand this! My mother in law calls me mama everytime we talk or see eachother... I dont know why it bothers me so much!!! But, yet its totally fine when my husband calls me mama... Idk maybe I am just being hormonal lol

GreenIvy08 · January 2015

I'm annoyed when people at my job say mama to me. Everyday it's "hey Mama", "how's mama doing?" Personally I find it irritating. Just use my name.

Katerina&Baby · January 2015

It doesn't bother me (I think it's kind of funny). The only things that really gets under my skin recently are unwanted stomach grabbing and when people try to force me to sit down/not carry something that isn't even heavy/etc - I'm pregnant, not broken!

KarasTwin · January 2015

No one has done that to me, but the belly rubbing has started, especially with my MIL who I love dearly. She's been doing it since we told them the day after BFP. I've told her several times that all she's touching at this point is my swollen uterus because LO is currently the size of an orange. If I was bloated from my period, I'm pretty sure she wouldn't touch my belly. I know it's going to happen more especially when I really start showing, but at 15 weeks, really not necessary

gingerbabe · January 2015

I didn't like that before my first either, but now that I have kids it's completely normal for people to refer to me as "mom" around my kids. I took a couple months after my first baby was born before I got used to the idea of being referred to as mom or calling my husband daddy in front of my baby. Now it is completely natural. So, I think its just one of those things you'll get used to.

rosabellegorman · January 2015

@elvinnoe‌ I used to get called "little mama" back when I worked with a whole bunch of older women. I didn't mind. It was a term of endearment. Plus I'm in the South so we get called all kind of weird things (always in love haha)

But of course back then I WAS little. Now I'm more mama than little mama.

HooDoll · January 2015

I'm not a fan, nor people asking how I'm feeling. I'm a person beyond my pregnancy! I have a very long time to be a mom, let me have these last few months!

wtbratcher · January 2015

Like some of the PP's said, it comes with the territory of being a mom. I get called "mom" by my DD's school, MMA instructors, Dr's office, etc. The word "mama" should be reserved for our kiddos; it's definitely weird being called that by anyone else (I call my mom that). I use "mommy" sometimes when I'm speaking to someone I know, more indirectly though. Like, when I give commentary 'from' their kids...

Trampslikeus · January 2015

All of sudden I feel like the internets are full of this stuff.... "10 things not to say to a pregnant woman", "10 things not to ask a new mom" etc. etc. etc You know... of all the things in the world that bother me? Nope. Doesn't even get picked up by the long range radar.

Its sad to me actually --- if we keep telling people not to ask us how we're feeling, not to ask us questions, not to say this or that --- eventually people are just going to stop talking to each other. Are there things that cross the line? Sure! Should a stranger ever touch you? God no. But so many of the other things (calling you mama being a perfect example) just seem like silly, petty things to get upset about. People are excited - I take that as a compliment. If they say something a little awkward, I shrug it off. Its not like I've never said anything awkward before...

kej0004 · January 2015

Trampslikeus said:

All of sudden I feel like the internets are full of this stuff.... "10 things not to say to a pregnant woman", "10 things not to ask a new mom" etc. etc. etc You know... of all the things in the world that bother me? Nope. Doesn't even get picked up by the long range radar.

Its sad to me actually --- if we keep telling people not to ask us how we're feeling, not to ask us questions, not to say this or that --- eventually people are just going to stop talking to each other. Are there things that cross the line? Sure! Should a stranger ever touch you? God no. But so many of the other things (calling you mama being a perfect example) just seem like silly, petty things to get upset about. People are excited - I take that as a compliment. If they say something a little awkward, I shrug it off. Its not like I've never said anything awkward before...

I'm not upset about it at all and I never say anything to anyone. It's just odd. After I got married, nobody started calling me "little wifey". I don't call anyone else at work "mama" or "dad" just because they have kids. I just find it incredibly awkward when people do it.

rrcameron21 · January 2015

I'm a manager at a large retail store so I manage people of all ages. All the older ladies want to do is call me mama, ask me how I'm feeling, touch my belly, and talk about baby stuff. Sometimes I just don't want all the attention

( But I think that's just my hormones talking. It really depends on the day haha

Apollo11235 · January 2015

I love when DH calls me Mama, but I was really weirded out when the first thing out of FIL's mouth when we visited last week was, "Hi, Mom!" I gave him a super weird look. I am not that man's mother.

sgarmand · January 2015

I have to agree with Tramps. It may be something to adjust to, but it's a term of endearment. I also don't understand people being upset about frequently being asked how they feel. If people weren't asking, everyone would be upset about that. It seems like a lose/lose.

sassypants2010 · January 2015

Only my family call me that and that is usually when talking to my son about me. Strangers or other people get no response because I have a name and I hate when people use my title instead of my name.

tinavonsparkle · January 2015

I really don't mind it. People are just excited and that's actually really sweet. Sometimes when people say it tho for a second or two I'm like ehhh?! Oh right, that's me! I am an actual Momma now!

I work with a lot of older African nurses and they always call each other Mamma as a term of endearment and they tell me it comes with a lot of respect and honour in their culture. Now I am included in the club as they have started to refer to me as Mamma too and it's so lovely. Makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside!

MCRM14 · January 2015

It hasn't bothered me much yet only a few people do it but I have had one coworker come up to me and put his hand on my barely there bump and ask me how the baby is doing...was a bit awkward I'm not ready for strangers to do this

kpgrala · January 2015

I dont mind it but Ive been called mom before. Im a kindergarten teacher and my kids always call me mom by accident. For the belly rubs family only. Its werid to have other people touch.

kbbtah · January 2015

Term of endearment. I dont mind at all.

ekmerritt4 · January 2015

In general, I find myself getting a little annoyed with the constant comments like "hey mama," "how are you feeling?" "Eating for two?" Etc. Well, I'm eating one banana (not two) so I'm not sure why you'd say that... I feel like people have now forgotten that I still have my own identity beyond being pregnant. I'm a FTM and this is a defining moment for me, so I recognize that it does shape my identity. But I feel like I can't talk to anyone about anything else! Example - called my MIL to get a recipe and she was like "oh wow is this a CRAVING?" And I was so annoyed...lol. I ate asparagus before I was pregnant too, ya know. Deep down I know everyone is thrilled and they mean well so I shouldn't get upset. The belly rubbing is starting to get old too. I'm 16w and a thin person so I'm already showing quite a bit. One (young female) coworker not only rubs my belly but several times has, from a sitting position, hugged my waist and rested her head on my stomach! Very up close and personal. I joked and said "all you'll hear is gas if you get too close" hoping it would get the point across. Latest gripe - if I say anything that disagrees with my husband it's now a "mood swing" which, when he says that, makes me even more pissed, further fueling my "mood" lol. Hate that!

Apollo11235 · January 2015

ekmerritt4 said:

In general, I find myself getting a little annoyed with the constant comments like "hey mama," "how are you feeling?" "Eating for two?" Etc. Well, I'm eating one banana (not two) so I'm not sure why you'd say that... I feel like people have now forgotten that I still have my own identity beyond being pregnant. I'm a FTM and this is a defining moment for me, so I recognize that it does shape my identity. But I feel like I can't talk to anyone about anything else! Example - called my MIL to get a recipe and she was like "oh wow is this a CRAVING?" And I was so annoyed...lol. I ate asparagus before I was pregnant too, ya know. Deep down I know everyone is thrilled and they mean well so I shouldn't get upset. The belly rubbing is starting to get old too. I'm 16w and a thin person so I'm already showing quite a bit. One (young female) coworker not only rubs my belly but several times has, from a sitting position, hugged my waist and rested her head on my stomach! Very up close and personal. I joked and said "all you'll hear is gas if you get too close" hoping it would get the point across. Latest gripe - if I say anything that disagrees with my husband it's now a "mood swing" which, when he says that, makes me even more pissed, further fueling my "mood" lol. Hate that!

Yes! I know they're just excited, but visiting my ILs I actually avoided cooking eggs for myself one morning because I felt like we would all have to talk about my "egg craving." Sometimes I just like to eat eggs for breakfast, guys. Especially when the only options for me in that house are that and bagels and I'm there for 4 days... Also, on a trip to the mall during the visit, I was asked like 4 times if there was anything I wanted, or was craving. a) No, I'm good thanks, and b) wanting food is not a symptom of pregnancy that needs discussed, it's a symptom of life.

Disclaimer: this is partly a reflection of my general desire not to be singled out, and partly a reflection of my relationship with my ILs. I can't say I'm their biggest fan even when they're not obsessing over the contents of my uterus.

BrightFirefly · January 2015

I haven't gotten used to the "When are you due?" Question. I keep thinking they are asking "What do you do?" Since I wear Scrubs. And I keep answering that I'm a nurse!!

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