April 2015 Moms

Comments people make...

So this is the first time I've posted- but I've had a really rough day. I had my 24 week check up today and did my glucose tolerance test (I had GD with my first born). That in mind, I asked my (covering) OB if my weight gain was ok- to which she responded "it's your weight gain". I asked what that meant, to which she huffed and actually looked at my chart. I have gained 6 lbs since my 20 week check up for a total gain of 11.5 lb so far. Her response: Ya, I guess it's a lot. And walked out the door. No explanation, advice or anything. I have to admit- I cried my eyes out. Confused, self conscious and frustrated. I was asking from a diabetes- prevention standpoint.

According to all preg- weight gain charts I am in the normal range. I just wanted to hear it from my md on the day of my glucose test- which I am already nervous about.

On top of that I am just sick of family and friends using the word "big". Look how big you've gotten, you've popped more since I saw you (like yesterday). It just feels rude and derogatory.

Anyone else going through this??

Re: Comments people make...

  • I get the "big" comments all the time.  One of my customers yesterday said, "that baby's coming soon!"  I'm only 6 months pregnant!  And I don't think I've gotten THAT big, thankyouverymuch.  

    I have the opposite weight problem: I'm right at my pre-pregnancy weight after losing weight the first 3 months and staying the same the next 3.  I'm not bragging; I'm actually worried about fetal growth, preterm labor, etc.  I eat when I'm hungry and I try to keep it healthy.  The doc hasn't said anything, so I guess I'm okay.

    You mentioned that the doc wasn't your regular OB; maybe that's why she was standoffish?  I would definitely call the office when your regular OB is in and voice your concerns.  If that doesn't work, I'd say something at your next appt with your regular OB.  Not knowing the patient personally is one thing, but blowing off a patient's question is not.  
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  • Sorry people are being insensitive. I wouldn't worry too much about your weight gain. If your regular OB hasn't brought it up to you it's probably fine. Everyone and every pregnancy is different and weight gain will be different for everyone. I gained about 30lbs with my first and have been fluctuating right around pre pregnancy weight with this one.
  • I agree with what people have said above. I get all sorts of comments. My midwife isn't concerned and says I'm right on track and the baby measured great on ultrasound, so that is what I keep in mind. I'm sorry you got such a weird response from the covering OB.... can you send your OB an email in between appointments to ask her what she thinks? That has been a helpful tool for me. 
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  • marirosem07marirosem07 member
    edited January 2015

    I get about half and half, some people say I look huge while the others say I barely look pregnant. While any comment about my weight makes me self-conscience, I try to make every effort to not let it get to me.  But the difference in opinion of other people just goes to show that people are idiots and only you and your doctor know what's healthy for you.


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  • Ive gained over 20 lbs and people tell me that I dont look like im 24 weeks at all. Which makes me feel weird because I cant tell if they are just being nice or what because I feel pretty large.
  • I am told on a daily basis that I look like I'm carrying multiples or that my dates must be wrong. It's excruciatingly annoying. I just brush them off, but I don't know if I can stand three more months of rude comments.
    I'm 4'11 so the weight looks different on me than a tall woman. My doctor is not concerned; it's just how I'm carrying. However, I still take deep breaths when I run across jerks at work.
  • 1) I don't think I would have asked the on-call doc. Their opinion wouldn't mean much to me. Either wait to speak with PCP or shot he/she an email.

    2) I take a different approach to most comments. For the longest time I didn't look pregnant, especially at work hidden in scrubs. Now people comment on me "popping" and "finally looking pregnant". I love it. I'm almost 28 weeks now and should look pregnant. I also don't mind the touching though either.

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  • I thought if you have GD for a pregnancy all subsequent pregnancies are treated as such?

    Call and leave a message for your OB. Let her know what happened and you want some reassurance. Not that you should need reassuring with an 11 lb weight gain.

    If you don't like being called big then ask people not to use that word. Tell them it makes you feel crappy.
  • I'm sorry that the OB blew you off, it's always frustrating when it seems like they don't think the patients questions are worth answering. Like other people have said, call when your regular OB is back and ask. I had to ask my OB about my weight gain (20ish pounds at 27 weeks), because they hadn't brought it up, she response was that it was perfectly normal and that they don't like to harp on weight gain, unless weight gain is unhealthy (too little or too much). So I'm sure that you are just fine!
  • Sorry people are making comments to you. I hate any comments about my size. Everyone keeps commenting how "small" I look even though I've gained 35 pounds so far at 27 weeks. When people specifically ask how much weight I've gained, I say "I don't talk about my weight." That usually quiets them.
  • I've gained 18 pounds at 26 weeks and this is my first pregnancy. No one has said anything to me. Plenty of women gain over 50 pounds and are still healthy pregnant women. If you don't feel comfortable with that OB ask to never be seen by them again.
  • Try not to let the weight comments get to you. I'm actually weighing in at less than my prepregnancy weight (I've been sick the entire time so far) and I have people telling me all the time I must be carrying twins or that I must be due any day now! People are dumb and should just not comment on a pregnant woman's weight. Period.

    As for your OB, like others have said... Call and talk to your usual OB. If she hasn't said anything about your weight, then I wouldn't worry too much. Good luck with your results and the rest of your pregnancy!
  • A lady at the gym said to me yesterday, "Oh, you didn't get your New Year's baby." She seemed genuinely disappointed despite not knowing me. I just responded with, "Actually I have a long ways to go."

    I'm not even 24 weeks yet! This is the first stupid comment I've gotten and I'm on my third pregnancy. Yes, I've gained 22 lbs, and I'll likely gain 50. I always do. I've never developed GD, so I understand being concerned over weight gain. I'd just do the best you can and take it up with your normal doctor at the next appointment.

    I wouldn't take anything too personally from other people as many just don't have a clue.
  • Ive had a similar experience as Im 24 weeks with twins and ive gained 15lbs. I was overweight pre pregnancy so I thought I was doing quite well until I went to my 24 weeks check up with my Family doc and glucose challenge this week. She told me I was carrying a lot of weight and I need to watch what I eat. Which i understand because i wasnt the smallest thing before pregnancy but I was also very offended in a way because ive tried so hard not to gain as much as my first pregnancy (60lbs :/) First of all, im 6 mnths prego, second of all, im carrying miltiples. And third, how does she know what im eating on a daily basis. Ive had many mixed emotions ..as we all know, being pregnant is sometimes not easy and when your doc is making comments like that it makes you feel your doing something wrong. The way I look at it.. its just another opinion unless your OB is concerned about excessive weight gain. Like I said, I had gained 60 lbs with my first (singleton), 40 by the 2nd trimester and my OB wasnt concerned then, so why should my fam doc have an opinion now about the 15 ive gained, with twins. I wouldnt let their snarky commemts let you down.. as long as Momma and baby are healthy and happy, thats all that matters ;)
  • Don't let the weight stress you out, easier said than done... Trust me, I struggle with this every appointment. I'm 27 weeks and have gained 22 lbs. I gained a lot at first and have sort of plateaued, however, I'm dreading my appt. on Monday. My DR always makes a comment about my weight. I feel like telling her "Listen lady... I eat healthy, do my cardio and feel great, get off my back!" As someone that has struggled with body image issues my entire life, this weight issue is hard to deal with, but I'm taking it day by day. Basically, I feel like this 24/7...
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  • klingspwn said:
    The janitor at my work mentioned twice the other day about how I was eating a glazer donut and how a bagel would be better for me... like excuse me?? How rude dude. He says "I don't mean to comment on your eating habits but..." then don't asshole! I can eat a fucking donut if I want to. The last time I ate a donut was probably a year ago so fuck off. It's not like I walk into work with a box of donuts everyday. Between that and the same coworkers constantly repeating "Are you sure you're not having twins?" "You're so big. Pregnant ladies don't get big until the last month." "Seriosuly you're so big." Seriosuly?? You've obviously never been pregnant before bitch. Just stop. I'm constantly saying I'm not that big and stop saying that and they are just relentless. They think it's funny but it doesn't make me feel good and I'm not laughing about it.
    People... ewwww. I'm sorry he was such a douche to you. 
  • kerimontanyekerimontanye member
    edited January 2015
    I usually don't care about the looking big comments, I know I'm big. But it really rubs me the wrong way when people ask what number this baby is, and I saY it's my fourth and I get the "you must be exhausted, tired, driven nuts, etc." I know what having this many kids is a lot, but it's nobody's business, and we're handleing it just fine, hence our decision to have another child, and the year of ttc it took. People are just idiots and my hormones this morning wanted to kill the Walmart cashier as she judged my choices.

    Edited cause getting pissed off makes me type badly.
  • ur_mom222ur_mom222 member
    edited January 2015
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    I love this pic haha but really, chin up. It's hard making babies and it's no ones place to make you feel bad about weight gain or no weight gain. Women in general have too much on our shoulders with appearance and it's bullshit.

    Edit because my phone freaked out.
  • People are stupid! I get people telling me I look great and then comments such as " I could see that belly from across the room" I'm pregnant so yes I'm going to gain weight or look "fat". I choose to ignore the stupid comments or give a smart ass comment back like "I'm pregnant what's your excuse". Everyone carries differently, as your dr isn't concerned then who cares what people think.

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