Rant.. Warning Its Long.

Re: Rant.. Warning Its Long.

• hetispagetti member

  January 2015

  I'm sorry your feeling like that! You need to talk to your partner about how you are feeling.....but whatever happens don't be jealous of his brother their relationship is different from yours so things happen at different time! Hope it all works out!

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• Unknown

  January 2015

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• delujm0 member

  January 2015

  I don't understand why his building a race car would stop your wedding plans? Getting married costs under $50 in most state courthouses. A giant expensive party is not necessary for you to be married.
  
  Also I agree with PP...why haven't you discussed this with him? After 7 years and almost 2 kids you should be able to talk about your feelings.

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• AF9211 member

  January 2015

  I don't normally post on the tri boards but I was lurking and felt the need to chime in. 

  
  

  I think you need to focus on welcoming your new LO to the world and let your DF's brother and his fiance have their special time, too. If I were DF's brother's fiance and you rushed to get married before me after waiting around for 5 years, I'd be incredibly upset and angry. It looks childish and like you're trying to take attention away from them because you're feeling jealous. It's not a competition to see who can rush down the aisle first. Why not let them enjoy this special time in their lives and plan the wedding of your dreams in the meantime?

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• BookitBoo member

  January 2015

  Why haven't you been planning your wedding? Like PP has said, talk to your fiancé. Set a date and make plans and get married. You don't need to se yourself up against SIL/BIL in a time race or anything. Don't plan it on the same weekend though

  
  

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• HStrawberry member

  January 2015

  As said above, talk to your fiancé about how you're feeling! I think too often people have this huge picture in their head of the perfect wedding (that tends to cost big $$$$). We had a very modest wedding after graduating college but managed to do all the traditional things. A close girlfriend spent $500 on a small family/close friends ceremony and BBQ after. It was just as special, if not more so, than the other weddings I've been too. She had a hard time letting go of the big fancy wedding idea at the time but now she is so happy she did it that way.
  
  I don't think you need to post-pone having a wedding just because your BIL is getting married in 6-7 months. My BIL got engaged a year after us and our weddings were only 2 months apart. In no way did I have any ill feelings towards them or feel like they stole my thunder. It was such a fun, special time for our family. It was actually a great bonding experience for me and SIL to be able to talk about wedding stuff. I've had two friends get married within weeks of a sibling and they had very similar, happy experiences as well. It's all in how you approach the situation... Positively or negatively.

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• KonaCoffeeBean member

  January 2015

  becnicole0210 said:

  My fiancee and I have been engaged for 5 years. We have one child 4years old and our second will be here in march. We have been engaged for so long and we never had any set plans for a wedding so time just started going by without the wedding planning or anything.. Now that I'm pregnant with #2 I've been having wedding blues... I want to get married soon. After the baby's born but not right away. Then last week on Christmas day my fiancées brother proposed to his girlfriend of one year. Today she was talking about them having their wedding in 6-7 months. I feel totally jealous and sad. I have been with my fiancee for 7 years and were still not married. Then today my DF says jokingly well were not getting married for a couple of years, I have to build a race car first. Hearing that totally crushed my feelings. I would like to get married before my BIL and his GF but it doesn't seem like that's going to happen. Sorry I guess I'm just ranting

  
  Are you engaged to a man? If so, the word is fiancé. If you are engaged to woman, then it's fiancée. Anyways, serious question, do the two of you really want to be married? It doesn't seem that way. If you are both committed to getting married, then it's probably time to do it already (unless you are waiting for gay marriage to be legal in your state; I really wasn't clear on this), otherwise it's just time to accept that marriage will not be a part of your relationship.

  Coffee Bean Born 6/13/15.
  2nd round exp 8/20/18.

  Meow.

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• ghostof5letters member

  January 2015

  Why aren't you planning your wedding. It doesn't take much effort to get married by a judge. 

  
  

  
  

  User Banned You have been banned from posting on the forums until 01-11-2165 8:18 AM. The reason for this ban is Inappropriate Links or Signature. Please return to participate in the forums after the ban has elapsed.

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• Unknown

  January 2015

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• lily0408 member

  January 2015

  There is a couple I know have been engaged for over 8 years, she was getting frustrated and sad it was never going to happen. Finally after soooo long they eventually got married a month ago. The time has to be right for the both of you, getting married is serious. Of course you know that but don't allow any negative comment get you down, just talk to him and see withing yourself if you truly want to marry as well. If so, then things clear with him ,communication is key. It's best to be sure you both want the same thing not only out of obligation but because you both truly love each other. Divorce is not a nice process to go through so yeah, talk about it and come to an agreement that will also give you a peace of mind. (=

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• yeah. member

  January 2015

  Read the signs. It's not going to happen. Either be ok with that, or let it go.

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• theseaword member

  January 2015

  Sounds like he either:
  - doesn't really want to get married, if he prioritizes "race car" over marriage to his fiancée and mother of his two children.
  -doesn't know that you care about this as a priority, which is a communication issue. If you do communicate your desire to set a date and he still insists on "race car", then I think you have your answer.

  
  

  
  

   

  

  I can't get the ticker to work, but I have two sons:

  Baby RJ, born 1/25/2014

  
  

  
  Formerly Twilightmv

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