Any Disabled Parents?

argomania · December 2014

Are there any disabled parents out there? My husband and I are looking to start a family. I have Cerebral Palsy and would like to talk to some people out there with different disabilities and how they've over come the challenges of parenthood.

I use a walker and can't carry the baby around...but I'm thinking of adding a carrier to my walker. Any other help/suggestions?

klondikebar · December 2014

I have chronic health problems, but I'm much worse now after 3 kids than when I first had my DD (now a teen). It's hard to know what to specifically suggest without knowing the extent of your challenges. I found the most help is hiring out as much as possible. I know this isn't financially an option for everyone. There are product ideas for adapting baby products. I know there's a side opening crib and stroller/carrier adapted for a wheel chair etc. And check out Through the Looking Glass organization. They work with disabled individuals to help them parent independently.

argomania · December 2014

Thanks for the replies. I'm pretty mobile. It's just my walking that's affected. At home I just hold onto furniture to get around but in public I have to use a walker. If I were to fall I cannot get up on my own.

I live in Canada. Finding resources isn't as easy as in the US. I've tried looking for cribs with side opening and have not found anything. I don't let my disability stop me. I work, I drive (hand controls). I know the child will adapt as it will be the only way they know how I do things but nonetheless it's still scary.

I'm waiting for a refferal to a high risk ob-gyn to hopefully give me some guidance.

Thanks for the suggestion on Through The Looking Glass. Eventhough it's Anerican, it still has some good info!

pepperedmoth · December 2014

Hmmm. What services are you already hooked into? If you see PT and/or OT, they should be able to help with adaptive resources and problem-solving of that kind.

I know the drop-side cribs were recalled, but might there be another kind of side-opening crib that isn't? Like maybe netting over a mattress that unzips?

argomania · December 2014

I live in Ontario.

I don't receive any services. I don't have a OT. I've just learned to do things on my own and try to function without help. I work full time in an office, I do everything else everyone else does...just sometimes a little differently. That's how I'd like to tackle parenting but my husband doesn't think it's a good idea. Lol

I've just discovered the Ontario Federation for Cerebral Palsy. Waiting to hear back from them.

klondikebar · December 2014

There aren't side opening cribs on the market that I'm aware of. I was speaking about ideas to adapt products. A crib can be converted to side opening. There are organizations that can help with this. This link has an example:
https://www.disabledparents.net/?page_id=95

(I don't know about the specific crib listed. It's just a quick googled example. You'd have to research organizations in your area and safety guidelines.)

argomania · December 2014

klondikebar said:
There aren't side opening cribs on the market that I'm aware of. I was speaking about ideas to adapt products. A crib can be converted to side opening. There are organizations that can help with this. This link has an example:
https://www.disabledparents.net/?page_id=95

(I don't know about the specific crib listed. It's just a quick googled example. You'd have to research organizations in your area and safety guidelines.)

I appreciate the link. I've actually tried contacting them and no response a few months ago. The site hasn't been updated in a few years. It looks like someone just modified the crib themselves. Which is a great idea except I have the least handy husband in the world.

I was thinking of using a co-sleeper like Arm's Reach for the first few months. Maybe one with wheels so I can move it from the bedroom to living room and so on.

Just trying to garner what others have done. I don't really want outside help, I'm sure that will change once I'm exhausted but I want to be able to bond with my child. My MIL is retired so I know she will be willing to help but I want to do it on my own.

[Deleted User] · December 2014

Is wearing a possibility? You can wear and still use the walker.

argomania · December 2014

MarlaSinger& said:
Is wearing a possibility? You can wear and still use the walker.

I'm going to try but I'd be afraid of it throwing off my balance.

[Deleted User] · December 2014

argomania said:

Is wearing a possibility? You can wear and still use the walker.
I'm going to try but I'd be afraid of it throwing off my balance.

Good point.

I know you said you want to remain independent and not rely on outside help. But I do suggest touching base with places for ideas and advice (kinda of like you are doing here).

argomania · December 2014

MarlaSinger& said:

argomania said:

MarlaSinger& said:
Is wearing a possibility? You can wear and still use the walker.

I'm going to try but I'd be afraid of it throwing off my balance.

Good point.

I know you said you want to remain independent and not rely on outside help. But I do suggest touching base with places for ideas and advice (kinda of like you are doing here).

Totally! I'm hoping this new ob/gyn I'm supposed to see in the new year can point me to an OT or something.

Unknown · January 2015

This content has been removed.

argomania · January 2015

aditigirl said:
Hi there! I have severe scoliosis (60 degree curve after 3 corrective surgeries, my height was seriously stunted due to the curve as well). I live with chronic pain and the difficulties of beig 4'6''.

In the beginning I used a Arm's Reach cosleeper. Once we transitioned Dd to a crib I just use a step stool to get her in and out. It got much easier once she could stand.

I will say, know your limits. It's great to be independent but sometimes you WILL need help, and that's okay!

Thanks for sharing your story. I pretty sure once the exhaustion kicks I'll be begging for help

argomania · January 2015

saltypearl said:
There was a story on CTV news just before Christmas about a group of retired carpenters that do custom work for various disabilities. One of the things they had made was a side open crib for a woman in a wheel chair. If you go to their main web site I'm sure you could find the story and contact information. (I'm also in Canada)

Aw man, I tried searching for it on the CTV site but can't seem to find it. I've tried to google it also and no luck

thanks though. I'll keep looking. Something like that would be great as my husband is not handy at all. He can't even put up a wall hanging properly lol

argomania · January 2015

Nothing like a family gathering and meeting a new baby to make you feel completely unfit to be a parent. I guess having 20 sets of eyes on me while I tried to soothe a baby who wouldn't stop crying made me really uncomfortable and made me start questioning my abilities to have a child. It was my first time meeting this 4 month old and I was really excited to get to hold him. But he was really cranky and wouldn't stop crying for me. As soon as someone else took him and walked around with him he was fine.

That night I came home and cried. I started to doubt myself about being able to care for a baby. What am I going to do when this scenario happens to me? I can't walk around carrying the baby.

Thankfully the videos I ordered from Through the Looking Glass came in the next day. They brought my spirits up quite a bit. It's amazing how a child can adapt to help you out. In the video they had a week old baby learning to lift it's bum up for a mother with one arm. Also got a video on different modified baby equipment. I'm feeling much better. I've also realized that it wasn't my baby, not someone who was used to me and my way of doing things. This baby was used to being walked around and wasn't happy with sitting in one spot. Just needed to vent...

argomania · January 2015

TyrannosaurusLex said:

I'm wondering - if you are in the GTA maybe you could contact UofT and ask if any of the professors for Mechanical eng. would be willing to offer creating adaptive technology for your needs as a parent as a student project. Could be a neat collaboration between the Occupational Therapy program as well.

I hadn't thought of that before but that sounds like a great idea! Thanks!

@Regal Mama‌ thanks for the PM. Very helpful also!

moonpie28 · July 2015

This thread is old but just thought I'd share my experience. I also have cp that affects my mobility. I don't need a walker but definitely have gait issues.

I second the idea of wearing. I have never fallen while wearing. It doesn't throw off my balance and actually I have never fallen carrying either boy.

At the times when I have worse days the rock and play sleeper was a miracle. Also we found a crib that was easier to access. There are differences in models. Which surprised me.

And you should be able to add a carrier to your walker as well. Maybe get an ot consult just for that??

Let me know if you want to chat in pm.

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