WWYD?

Davie813 · December 2014

So I just had my WTF appointment (phone call actually) with my RE, and I'm not sure whether to go ahead this cycle.

My husband and I were both hoping to sit it out and try again with the next round of IVFs at my clinic. My reasoning is that I'm just not in a very good place to cycle right now. My health and habits are terrible; I just learned this morning (thanks, @Frenchteachermama!

) that I actually weigh waaaay more than I did when I was pregnant; I'm exhausted; I'm stressed; work is a nightmare at this time of year and missing it isn't going to help...etc, etc...I think addressing some of this stuff, and giving my body a break, might actually help.

The RE is OKish with that (she can't stop me, obviously), but doesn't recommend it. She thinks hormones fluctuate enough at my age that I'll never know when I may have to cancel a cycle, so wasting one is a bad idea. And of course the clock is ticking. I turn 41 in March. My bloodwork seems pretty stable, however.

I know most of you aren't as AMA as I am, but what would you do, take a break or get on with it?

Frenchteachermama · December 2014

UGH...tough choice. I feel like everything in IF is so "OMG THE WORLD IS GOING TO END IF I DON'T DO SOMETHING THIS CYCLE".....Every cycle since this time last year I've been bitchy and pissy if I can't TTC. And in the end all of them ended in BFNs anyway. I guess what I'm trying to say is taking one or two months off (or even just to try on your own) isn't going to be the end of the world. I get what your doctor is saying but I also think being physically and mentally prepared for another round of IVF is just as big of a deal.

lilmac2929 · December 2014

Such a tough question. I have done this for two cycles (along with look for new RE) and i will say I m feeling much better! I guess if you were it would be best if you had a good plan and commitment. I say that not preachy because I wish I did as I was a little all over the place. Like I wish I meal planned and shopped and set real apptments (with child care or during naps) for exercising etc.

I nothing else, the mental break for stress if you know work is nuts now may help. I cant answer or you, but I'd take the break

pettycrocker · December 2014

I would 100% take a break. IVF is fucking hard enough, you have to be able to to mentally/emotionally/physically give it your ALL, and remain positive. If your instinct is telling you, you need to time to prepare for another round, then I say take as much time as you need. The worst thing is, you push yourself to cycle now, it doesn't work, and you kick yourself for pushing yourself to do it when you know you didn't feel ready.

pettycrocker · December 2014

Do you have an option to do a freeze all cycle? Maybe you can just stim/ retrieve and then transfer when you are feeling a little more "ready" Idk if that is an option for you?

jen4ny · December 2014

I would lean towards taking a break too. We were forced to take a break this cycle waiting for polyp removal- and then I got sick and we didn't even try the natural way. I have to say that it was liberating and so much less stressful to be thinking about when we had to TTC and analyzing every symptom I felt. I am kind of glad that next cycle will be an off cycle with the hysteroscopy coming up. I didn't realize it but I definitely needed the mental break.

MoFree · December 2014

Since you are almost 41 I would not wait too long. However a few months' mental health recess will probably do your spirit a world of good.
I am 37 1/2, dealing with 3 FET failures in 12 months and am emotionally spent. I am on hiatus until RE appointment in late January. After that who knows how long additional testing will take.
I'm so sorry you're in this situation. IF is such a mindfvck that we second guess all of our decisions when things don't work out.

Jen071407 · December 2014

That's such a hard call. If it were me 2 years ago I'd say forge ahead, me now says breaks are amazing for mental health if you are 100% on board with taking a real break. I do like the idea @potatocastillo‌ had of doing an ER but holding off for a FET if that's an option!

mommiesandbabies · December 2014

I'd take a break this month then reevaluate. Cycling stressed is no bueno. But I wouldn't wait too long at AMA...maybe get in the next batch?

ellebelle2384 · December 2014

That's a really tough call. I also like @potatocastillo's suggestion of doing a ER and then just waiting to do the FET if you can. Maybe a mini break if you can't do that but I wouldn't wait too long either. I'm sorry you're in this place.

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