My DS is 2yr7m and his nursery school teachers (he is there 2 half days totaling 6 hrs a week) brought up that he doesn't engage with other children as they would expect. They used this and his repeating to suggest an evaluation. I am not sure how children should play with one another at this point but I see him often play with his cousins- for ex, they crash their cars or take turns sliding them down a ramp, they play tag, dances with them, hides under blankets, plays ring around the rosies, they take turns pushing e/o on a ride on car, etc. He will often try to engage his one cousin who is less active to play with him. His cousins are a mix of older/younger/same age.
Recently, DH and I dropped him off together. I was speaking with one teacher and he saw DS trying to organize something with other children. He was telling them which trucks to play with, etc. The teachers did say that what they see may only be because he isn't there as much as the other children who are mostly there 3 or 5 (some full) days.
Isn't this all cooperative play? I am so confused especially because I am also reading that parallel play is normal at his age anyway.
Re: Parallel Play Question
Thanks. I did call last week and have initiated the ppwk necessary. I do think the repeating is somewhat of an issue so I do plan to go through with the eval.
I'm just curious about the parallel/cooperative play.
See above. Also, thank you for your thorough response. I do plan to go through with an eval since it was suggested and I don't feel right ignoring it but I have wait 2 weeks before I even get the package of ppwk in the mail and am trying to make sense of this.
ETA- They said they suggested the eval now because he is under 3 and that is alot more "user friendly" through early intervention. This way I could have the eval done more easily then if he is still doing these things in a few months and I have to go through the over 3 program. When I called, I was told I have to go the over 3 route anyway.
Thanks for everyone's input. This is all helpful. I went into that parent teacher conference expecting to hear some general feedback and felt blindsided by the suggestion for an evaluation especially because I know in what direction the items of concern point. I didn't even consider any of these things (although I brought up his car obsession at his 15 month pedi visit) before because they seemed typical to me.
@auntie I think he is pretty good. He tells me what he did at school or grandmas, etc. Recently it was a story about the play structure and how some children were blocking the slide and he told them to move. I always ask about snack. so recently I asked and he said there were "apples & crackers...i ate crackers" I said "did you eat the apples," he said "i didnt eat it." The same goes for grandmas or just talking about things we did in the past. The school sends recap emails about what they did during the week and with photos so I use that as ideas to ask about different things.
Of course sometimes depending on his mood, he doesn't care to answer my questions at all.
My DS also said no to every answer even if it was something he wanted. He hardly said yes before he turned 3. My DD who is 18 months will nod yes or no to answer questions. DS never did this. We have worked a lot on his echoing since it was pointed out to me last year. Some examples are if I said so you want to go outside, he would say go outside instead of saying yes. My DS also loves cars and trucks. The description @dc2london gave of how her DS1 plays sounds a lot like my DS. He makes me food instead of helping me make food. Up until a few months ago, his way to color was to tell me to draw him a car or a truck instead of him coloring with me. My DD colors with me.
I have an appointment in March with a neurologist at our local children's hospital to see if DS has autism. When the speech therapist pointed out her concerns in October, I called the school again and because of the help of the private speech therapist, they are giving him services now. He is starting at our town's school next week with an IEP and they are going to focus on his speech and social skills.
Good luck with your evaluation.