I'm back after a second loss (living child mentioned)

LittleDucky · December 2014

Hi ladies, I'm sorry to say that I am back on this board for the second time.

My first loss was a missed miscarriage in July 2014, discovered at my initial ultrasound and appointment at 8 weeks (only measured 5w6d), followed by a D&C. I got pregnant again at the end of October and was so relieved to see a heartbeat at my initial ultrasound and appointment right before Thanksgiving. Baby was measuring right on track at 8w0d and I had a due date of 7/6/15. My nerves were put at ease and I really though we were out of the woods as far as miscarriage risk.

Well, I went for my NT scan Monday and I knew as soon as the ultrasound tech put the scanner on my belly that the image on the screen did not look anywhere as developed as it should have at 12 weeks. There was no heartbeat and the baby only measured 8w2d. DH and I were completely shocked because I had still been having normal pregnancy symptoms (nausea, fatigue, food aversions, etc.) and had no bleeding or cramping at all. I had a D&C yesterday and it went fine.

They got some tissue from the D&C so they can test it and see if there are any signs of chromosomal problems that could have caused the miscarriage. I'm hoping that's what it is and that it's just a fluke that I had two missed miscarriages in a row. My doctor said that of the tissue comes back genetically normal, at that point we will talk about additional testing to try to figure out if anything identifiable might be causing these miscarriages.

I have no idea how long I will be told to wait to TTC again. My last loss I had the go ahead to try again after my first regular period, but I definitely want to see what is going on with the genetic testing (which will take a few weeks anyway) and then see whether I need to do other testing or not before TTC again. I will definitely be asking for additional monitoring during any future pregnancy. This time I had no extra monitoring (my OB doesn't do anything different after a first miscarriage), so who knows whether my progesterone was low or anything like that. I didn't have any blood work or anything until 8 weeks, and they didn't check progesterone. Next time I am going to was blood work and monitoring immediately following a BFP.

Anyways... I know this is a long post, but I wanted to reintroduce myself and explain where I am at right now. Wishing everyone who celebrates a Merry Christmas and hoping that 2015 is a happy year for us all.

dandb925 · December 2014

I'm so sorry for your losses. Lots of ((hugs)) your way.

LittleDucky · December 2014

Thanks, ladies. I know I'm not officially TTCAL yet, but I hope it's ok that I returned to this board already. I found it a helpful and supportive place to be when we were TTC after my previous loss.

Nikolie93 · December 2014

Again, I'm sorry for your loss. You're more than welcome here and I hope it gives you the support you need.

*hugs*

CC1017 · December 2014

I'm so sorry for your losses. There are several of us on the board who are currently TTA so you are more than welcome to participate!

LittleDucky · December 2014

Greeneyes842 said:

So sorry for loss, (((huge hugs))). Feel free to PM me if you ever want to talk or have questions about RPL testing - I'm going through that now as well. ETA: I noticed you put a warning on your post, but this board in general isn't the best place to discuss living children, especially in the context of a sibling getting to be a big brother etc. I would encourage you to edit that part of your post as to not hurt anyone without living children.

Thanks for pointing that out, @Greeneyes842. I just wanted to clarify - do you think I should remove any mention of my living child from my signature. (I went ahead and removed the birthday ticker I had before, but I left in the dates relating to the BFP for that pregnancy and the date he was born.) I read through the etiquette pages when I was here previously, and checked again just now, and I see the part about removing photos of living children but I didn't see anything about not mentioning them at all. I fully acknowledge that I may have missed something though.

I just included the information about my son in my re-introduction because it is relevant to what I'm feeling right now in relation to my loss and the sadness particularly during the holiday season. I sincerely apologize if it hurt anyone and I will remove it.

bfonz619 · December 2014

I am so sorry for your losses.

purplehaze11 · December 2014

I'm so sorry for your losses. I've also hd two miscarriages this year, and recently went through recurrent loss testing. Feel free to PM me if you want more insight.

LittleDucky · December 2014

Thanks ladies who have offered to talk with me about going through recurrent loss testing. After we get the results back from the genetic testing, if we end up going down that road, I will definitely reach out to you. It is definitely good to know that there is a community of people who have gone through the same thing (although of course I wish none of us were here in this situation).