Dinner problems
BeebopandBuddy
member
We are struggling so much with Maya's eating. I don't know what to do at this point. We were just offering food and she could eat it or not. She rejected nearly everything every night. So we started making her eat 2 bites before she could get down. That worked for the first week, but the last couple of weeks it has turned into a terrible thing where she sits there for an hour, refusing to eat and ends up having to go straight to bed because, by the time she finally eats the two bites, it's bedtime. The last two nights she has peed in her chair too. On purpose. Yep, it's bad.
I told DH we need to start using the chart I made again and letting her earn a token each night for trying everything on her plate to get a special something on the weekend. I don't know why, but he hates using the chart and never really follows through. His inconsistency is why we stopped using it in the first place. He says he will do it, but I have so little faith. I am really at the end of my rope.
I don't want to restart the food debate, so let me just include that we are not willing to make her a preferred item to eat each night. Ethan eats what we eat, we feel like she can too.
P&R- I have a meeting, be back in a bit.
Re: Dinner problems
She's saying she hates the food, but she won't try it. The pedi told us to keep offering and she will eventually start adding to her menu, but we have been doing this with her for 2 years and aren't making any progress at all. She is never breaking down and trying anything. I've tried letting her pick things but last night we had a pasta that she picked out at the store and she refused to eat it at all. I've also tried letting her help make it, but that doesn't seem to work either. I make her lunch for school at least 3 days a week, so I know she is eating a regular portion (1/2 sandwich, go-gurt or cheese stick, veggie straws or goldfish). The school gives them snacks and they don't really tell us how much she eats.
Big Kid Jan 2010
Littlest Man Sept 2012
I'm sorry. I feel like I have no advice. B eats good some days and others not so much. He'll refuse to eat dinner and sometimes he does go to bed without eating anything. I know if he's hungry he'll eat. DH started to tell him not to eat things to play a game and that actually really works. He tried eggs about 8 months ago and wouldn't touch them since then. He actually ate a few bites the other night.
Also does she get a snack later at school that might be affecting her appetite at home? I know if B eats too much of a snack or too late he doesn't want dinner.
Sorry you're having to go through this. Just know if she's really truly hungry she'll eat.
Emma Rose - 9.14.05 Beckett - 5.26.07 Sawyer - 9.22.12 Lennon Mae - 9.26.14
Maybe it's like @akb090609 said and she just doesn't want to eat much for dinner. Maybe it's a sensory thing? It might be worth getting feedback from school about how snacks go.
What I meant by saying that Ethan eats what we eat is that it isn't un-kid-friendly (spicy, strange) food. I definitely know all kids have different needs. If it was up to her she would eat the same 5 items for every meal: bread/pasta, cheese, PB&J, fruit, plain tomato sauce.
She will eat any kind of carby snack item. She will eat Mickey Mouse chicken nuggets from Costco, but not any other kind. She will eat spaghetti with tomato sauce, but not rotini with tomato sauce. It's things like that that make me so frustrated. I know she has some hesitation about textures, like lots of kids do, and I'm ok with that. It's the extreme pickiness that becomes really frustrating.
I'm going to try to incorporate some rewards and maybe some of the game stuff you guys have suggested. She will eat all or most of her dinner if I serve a preferred food, so I don't think it's lack of hunger. We have only been asking her to take 2 bites of things, not clean her plate. I am going to try to incorporate more raw veggies because she may eat those more. She has eaten them some in the past but, for some reason, I never think to incorporate them with dinner unless it's a salad.
First of all big hugs, this sounds like a frustrating situation to be in!
Kate was struggling to eat lately, and we also tried implementing the two bite rule. She likes a lot of different types of food, but just doesn't want to eat at night, even her favorite things.
One thing we've been trying with her babysitter is no snacking at all between meals. I know it seems a little cruel not to give a kid a snack during the day (she obviously can have water and milk if she wants it) but her appetitie is so little that if she even eats a handful of goldfish or one pouch of applesauce then it crushes her appetite for several hours.
Katherine Quinn | 9.16.2012 | 38w4d
Ryan Lanman | 9.12.2014 | 40w
2 Losses | 10/2010 @ 5w | 9/2013 @ 10w4d
Little Sprout Blog
Things we've done for ds in the past is: having the kids see who is going to beat who to finish all their food. Winner gets dessert. And MH will pretend like he's going to eat DS's food...pull his plate toward him, or sneak his fork onto his plate to poke at his food.
I will turn it into a math lesson. I'll ask him to tAke bites counting down from 10. Or eat 3 bites plus 2 bites. Also, he's big on patterns thanks to Umi Zoomie so I'll line pieces of food up in a pattern (meat, veggie, grain, meat, veggie, grain) & ask him to eat it.