Thursday!

20thirteen · December 2014

This is me this morning:

Not enough coffee... ... ... ... zzz... ... ... zzzghnuh wha?

Anyway, I'm trying to get my co-workers into that podcast Serial and its not working so I have no one to talk to about it. A couple of them asked me what a podcast was.

Today is the last episode of the first season, so I urge you guys to listen to it so I can talk about it with grown-ass people. I'm sure my daughter does not care about who killed Hae.

Also, the closer we get to Christmas, the more on edge I get. With BD, he always managed to ruin Christmas and the last two years of our relationship, he dumped me ON Christmas. The first time, I was too drunk to go home and we ended up getting back together the next morning. The second time, I was pregnant and he called me from his secret girlfriend's house where she dumped me because he wasn't man enough to do it himself. Sometimes I still dream of doing this to her:

*stab stab*

But only because she was a total cunt. Not at all for any other reason. I knew it was totally and completely over between BD and I, but she was just the worst kind of person. I don't know if I told you guys that I found out she was arrested for assaulting BD, but she's currently in jail.

Anyway, last year for Christmas at BF's house, his parents spent well over $400 for DD and me.

I can NOT think of anyone I know who can put that kind of money into gift giving. Not my parents, not my extended family, none of my friends. His parents cash flow intimidates me and freaks me out. They took us to dinner Thanksgiving (even though our plan was to bring them dinner) and they dropped $200 on a meal without a second thought. All I have for cash, I spent on chocolates (BOGO at Jewel) and some wine to go with them because the wine was on sale. Like, that is their gift. I'm terrified. Also, we're going to go to BF's aunt's house for Christmas Eve and I'm just not at all prepared. I guess I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop, and have been since November. So it's like either just try to relax or fucking drop the shoe!

I can't relax though! Christmas is so hard to deal with because for about 7 years (last year not included), Christmas was ruined for me. I'm not used to good things happening and I am definitely not really a gift receiver/giver. I don't like gifts, I feel weird about getting them, I feel like I just don't know how to shop for others... I worry about passing that on to DD...

And I totally get this is the stupidest thing to be concerned about and I'm probably WAY WAY overreacting but damn... I just can't relax. Also, I took off 12/29, 12/30, and 12/31 and my office is closed 12/25, 12/26, 1/1, and 1/2 so I have an end of the year staycation coming up.

^^ new fave gif

What is going on with everyone?! Also, tips to help me back down to Earth from all this Christmas business would be great.

jellybean529 · December 2014

I LOVE gift giving. It's probably one of my most favorite things in the world. I would give everybody a present if I had millions of dollars stashed away.

Receiving, though? Not as big a fan

Unrelated...but this week has just sucked. I'm moving next Monday (22nd) so naturally this Monday I would get hit with the cold virus from hell, which has knocked me on my ass. I tried to push through Tuesday night and get packing done, but then I fucked up my back and knee and now this is pretty much how I feel about life..

and

...with a side dose of...

STBXH will be here on Sunday. He's staying until January 3rd. In exchange for helping me move, he'll be staying at my new apartment (on an air mattress in DD's room). PLEASE OH PLEASE LET THIS NOT BE AWKWARD.

Anyway. That's life my random Thursday griping.

jellybean529 · December 2014

Also @20thirteen I wouldn't worry as much about matching dollar amounts. I've never been able to. I think the gift you bought them is perfect!

20thirteen · December 2014

@jellybean529 I do the charity thing. My mom and I have a Christmas tradition of donating to a charity in lieu of gifts. I donated to St. Jude's this year and she donated to the Jeanette Rankin Foundation. That is what I'm used to. LOL and I don't worry about matching dollar amounts, I worry about the perception of being ungrateful because I'm just not used to being so doted on nor getting gifts on Christmas.

I hope you're feeling better! And I also hope it's not awkward for you and your STBXH. Crossing my fingers for good ju-ju to you! hahaha

MinnesotaMomma91 · December 2014

I hate getting presents. At any time. I just feel awkward. But i love giving presents. I didnt spend a lot this year with the exception of b and c i spent more on them.

This has been a rough week and im ready for it to be over. Im just exhausted. Can i be done being an adult now.

ST3WD · December 2014

@20thirteen Woah, December is not a happy time for you, eh? Chanukkah is well underway if you want to try that at some point. :P

I wouldn't worry about the gifts. The one you got for them is lovely, and any decent person understands it's the sentiment, not the price. Keep in mind that they've had more time to establish themselves and remember being young and broke. I hope to someday make my LO's SO feel welcome into our family for the holidays.

@jellybean529 FEEL BETTER!!

FX that everything goes well with your STBXH. It's only awkward if you make it awkward? (< Stupid advice never works for me, but maybe it will for you? lol) And congrats on the new place!

@MinnesotaMomma91 Chin up! I'm late but it's FRRRRIIIIIIDAY!

Enjoy adulthood for now. Sure, retirement has it's perks, but it's down-sides are a drag. :P

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