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Ideas for Childcare

kalyth76kalyth76 member
in Working Moms
Hi All --

I have a DS who is 22 months old that currently spends days that I work with my mom. I am now expecting another little one in July 2015. My mom is in her late 60's and while she loves DS, I don't think she will be able to handle 2 small children all day. She will, however, want to be involved in their day to day care. Husband and I are looking at childcare options to start next year. Would a nanny be open to working with my mother and being part of a childcare "team" or would we be better off hiring a full-time mother's helper? My only concern with a mother's helper is that many don't seem to be full-time and lots are teenagers (maybe I just haven't looked at enough of them). My opposite concern with a full-time nanny is that having my mom "participate" may cramp her style in bonding with the kid(s). Any ideas or thoughts you all might have?

Thanks so much!!

Kate
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Re: Ideas for Childcare

  • 2chatter2chatter member

    My middle ground was 5 days a week of MDO 9-2 and my mom cared for them before and after.  It broke up the day, was affordable and ensured the kids stayed on the schedule I preferred.  Could your mom handle them in the morning, get them to MDO and then in the afternoons? 

    A nanny or helper would have made my mom insane.  But maybe you could split the day similarly to MDO?  ie, Nanny from 7-2, mom from 2-5 each day? 

    Most MDOs don't take newborns, though, so depends on how long your mat leave is if that would work for you. 

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  • shannmshannm member
    It may be time to switch to non familial child care. I was going to suggest splitting days between your mom and a DCP but if you don't think you can trust her with two babies, I wouldn't.
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  • *sparky**sparky* member
    My dad and his wife used to pick DS up from DC early two days a week and bring him to our house so they could have some time with him but not be his FT caregivers 5 days a week. Then when he was around 9 months we hired a nanny to watch him three days a week and my parents had him 2 days.

    I can't imagine you would find a nanny who would be willing to co-nanny with your mom but I could be wrong.

     

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  • kalyth76kalyth76 member
    Thanks All!!! I really appreciate your feedback and suggestions!

    Kate
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  • kalyth76kalyth76 member
    Thanks All!!! I really appreciate your feedback and suggestions!

    Kate
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  • shakinrosshakinros member
    Is the concern about 2 small children at any time? Or all day?

    Cause if you think she could handle it part time (and she thinks she could handle that), then something like what @2chatter‌ is suggesting could work.
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  • skibunny59skibunny59 member
    My mom took care of DD fulltime (2 1/2)  since she was 6 months old.  I am on ML now and will be home for 9 months.  I think my mom could handle 2 but I think it would be a lot for her so I plan on putting DD in preschool fulltime and using my mom for just the baby.  I could do daycare for both of them but I really like having my mom while my kids are little.

    A mother's helper would drive my mom crazy.
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  • KatelobsterKatelobster member
    edited December 2014
    Could you send your older child to daycare and have your mom keep the baby?
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  • sugarbear0524sugarbear0524 member
    Your DS is almost 2. Discipline and boundaries are going to become increasingly important and challenging. Think carefully about whether you want your mom dealing with that. I don't know how that would work well with a nanny/mother's helper. It will be challenging enough to be on the same page with your mom.

    This comment is totally influenced by the fact that if my son had stayed with my MIL, he would be rotten. She lets him do anything he wants which would make things very difficult at home.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member

    Can I ask why your mom feels the need to be involved daily with your DS if she is not the caregiver? 

    Maybe I'm too independent but holy smothering.


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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    Katelobster said:
    Could you send your older child to daycare and have your mom keep the baby?
    This really seems to be the best of both. 
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