My Recent Loss- cytotec experience

This is my first post and I thought I would share my story, as reading other stories has helped me and educated me by reading experiences. Last Wednesday my husband and I went to my 10 week appointment to find that there was no heart beat and the baby had stopped growing/developing/living at  about week 8.5. My Dr. had me take 4 pills every 12 hours of cytotec 3x. I started the process that night at 8pm and it was very tough. I had really bad cramping and could only put up with myself and how I felt by taking a hot bath and sitting in it throughout the night. I finally started to bleed and spot at 3am and I was relieved that something was happening. I actually started to look up what cytotec was at 4 a.m. because I was in a lot of pain and I had no idea what I had put in me (I did not take my pills orally...) I continued to lay in bed all day and started passing heavier clots and blood, especially when going to the bathroom. After reading the boards I wish I would have had some adult diapers or something because I bled through a lot. I took some ibuprophen to help with my cramps. I also wish I would have called my Dr. to get some more helpful pain reliever. (It is hard enough dealing with the loss, let alone any physical pain). think my Dr. prepared me for the outcomes or could have, however when given the news I was more focused on the news than the instruction and process my body was going to have to deal with. On Friday night (Day 2) I passed a very large clot or something. It was about the size of a  small remote. All I could do was stare at it....could have just been tissue. Throughout the weekend I bleed as if it were a heavier period. By day 5-7 I was/am only spotting, no cramps.

 The previous advice given is very good:  Have hot pads, pain medication, adult diapers, and your own personal sleeping area. I only had super pads and can't remember the last time I wore a pad. . . . they worked but at night were not very good.

This week has been really tough since we are going into the holidays. All I notice now are how many pregnant women there are. I did have my follow up appointment today (a week later) and they said I passed most of the tissue I needed to pass (via ultra sound), but there was still some layers of blood. She said the next step is to call her the day I start my next period. The Dr. said I would be put on hormones to help guide my future process. I actually don't think I am asking all the questions I need to ask about that because I am still processing my recent loss. I feel naïve as I don't know what my hormone levels ever were, should be, or what levels are good or bad.  

I had told some close friends and family members. It was hard not to, as they were trying to figure out why I wasn't going out, being myself, getting sick, and not having wine with dinners. Now that I am processing the mc better I am openly talking about it with some close people/friends. It is crazy to hear/see how many people go through this. I know it can be private to a lot of people, but reading about it and knowing that I couldn't do anything to prevent it has helped me. Everyone processes loss differently and I am taking it day by day. Some days I am angry, some days sad, and some days positive.