OPP Tuesday

theholmanherd · December 2014

Sorry I've been MIA. My uncle is in town until this afternoon. I will login tonight to check notifications and whatnot.

LindseyM2012 · December 2014

@Rumbera28 - WOW!!! That is not cool

@osesecret - This may sound very insensitive of me, but why on Earth would a coworker (i.e. professional peer) think you'd be interested in seeing her/his cousin's (i.e. not immediate family) newborn? I just don't understand how someone would think that is acceptable.

@rainbowbridge14 - HUGS!!! All the lovely family pictures around this time of year can really hit hard.

I walk through the train station every morning and evening during the week and the holidays are in FULL swing according to Chicagoland Metra. This morning there was a girls' choir singing christmas carols in the middle of the atrium (lovely acoustics - they sounded great). There were women (who I can only assume were their mothers) taking video of the lovely performance and they looked so happy and proud of their little daughters (aged I'm guessing from 6-10). I am a musician and will likely have my children involved in music at that age and will attend every performance. I almost cried thinking, "I wish I was one of those proud mothers of one of those talented, beautiful little girls. My little baby would be so cute up there."

ETA: I am blaming every emotional overreaction on these darn progesterone sups!!! And the sentimental nature of the season. We'll get through the holidays together, ladies!

BandM14 · December 2014

My last three intakes at work have all been pregnant and still using ~X(

ETA: Oh, and my boss called me a "pregnant woman magnet."

BandM14 · December 2014

BlueFairy5 said:

@Rumbera28, @osesecret, Not sure *why* exactly your sister and coworker thought those texts were a spiffy idea. My BFF texted me a newborn pic of her SIL's kid. SIL was a 13-y-o bridesmaid when we were in BFF's wedding. It's like, "I will be excited about *your* baby pics. I don't really want to be tortured with hers, though."

@rainbowbridge14 This is when I sit back and thank the Fates that my cousins never got into the holiday car thing. Ugh. And it's fine to be grumpy.

@LindseyM2012 Your description made me tear up. Usually I'm okay around non-infants/toddlers, but sometimes when you see kids or tweens interacting with their parents it really hits your gut in a particular way.

@BandM14 Oh my word, I don't even know how you're dealing with that. That is just... yikes. (Is it inappropriate to offer wine to you in this instance? )

I just learned that I'm being dragged to the family Chanukah party on Friday. I love my nephew (7) and niece (5) to death, and MH's SIL's step-brother's (got all that?) two kids (3 and 10 months) are pretty much the cutest human beings to ever exist, but it is going to be especially hard to spend time around them smack in my 2WW having just taken an IVF class the day before the party.

My other one is that, when I was leaving after my IUI (and scheduling the IVF class) today, a former patient was in the waiting room with her twin boys (4-5 months?), with two of the nurses cooing over them. But it didn't actually bother me in that moment, for whatever reason. I more felt like, "Hey look, they got it done for her!" So I'm trying to hold onto that.

Hahah it's MORE than appropriate to offer me wine. But hey, maybe I should go for the harder stuff since that's what seems to be the ticket to pregnancy these days. Maybe they are cutting heroin with Clomid lately, who knows??

And I don't know how I deal with it either... clearly by getting sarcastic and bitter (SO not my usual self, I swear).

TTCBabyJ · December 2014

There were sooooooo many pregnant women on my recent cruise. I thought well I'll get in the hot tub to escape them in the pool and one pregnant woman actually got in there as well. DH was really supportive about leaving areas.

BunnyBerry · December 2014

Got annoyed at a yellow magnet on a car in front of me, "Expectant mother on board" with a silhouette of a be-bumped woman. Is this a thing? Thanks for rubbing it in my face, bi-otch!

Got family holiday pics of twins, and feels like it was just yesterday we got the birth announcement photo. They're so beautiful, but I wish I could just have the post office hold all that mail until after I'm PAIF or SAIF...just not ready to appreciate them yet.

Spent Saturday night with a couple and their 4-month-old. At first it was fun, but then I was just bored out of my mind, and felt like saying, "Take your kid off my hands already so I can eat a cannoli!" Then I had a freak out moment that I will feel that way about my own kid. Am I going to be so jaded by the time it comes that I will be one of those burnt out moms?

@onesecret Oh, how gauche! Who feels the need to announce that to the world?

@bandm14 I'm sorry, that is so unfair.

@rainbowbridge14 I go back and forth from "I will never post pics on FB / send family holiday pictures / whatever" and "I can't wait until it's my turn!!!"

cateyes543 · December 2014

Hugs to @rumbera28 and @osecret. Those kind of texts suck, whether you are happy or not for people.

@rainbowbridge14-I feel like this is the year of Christmas cards of u/s pics. I know those bargains all too well!

@lindseyM2012-Hugs to you too! Those longings and pain of the what-ifs/should bes suck.

@BandM14-That is so hard! Good luck taking care of yourself during those hard times! My whole last job was working with moms and soon to be moms who were using and it was super hard once we were TTC. I too may have made sarcastic jokes such as “maybe I should start doing drugs”.

I am at an ok point right now so I just wanted to send hugs to everyone who needs them!

LindseyM2012 · December 2014

@BunnyBerry - HUGS! Sounds like you've had a rough week. I think you'd be hard pressed to find a woman who went through IF treatments to have a baby who is that burned out. I just heard a woman on my train say to another woman that her 4 year old daughter is a "pain in the @$$". I would love to have a 4 year old try to stall my getting ready for work because she doesn't want me to leave! I really believe that IF is going to make us all so appreciative of the life we worked so hard to make. You will be a lovely mother!!

tweetyknicks · December 2014

@bunnyberry Yep, I'm worried about being burned out too. Will my kids annoy me the way other people's kids do sometimes? MH assures me that it's different.

BKAlyssa · December 2014

3 pregnancy announcements- 2 of which are on #3, the other was a total out of nowhere announcement, and 4 newborns all this week. I know many of you already avoid Facebook, and I am definitely thinking of doing the same. I love Instagram, though, and one of the ladies is documenting her entire pregnancy there. I just might have to unfollow her if she continues with the daily updates.

cateyes543 · December 2014

And the cosmic universe hates me. I literally hit post on my reply above and my dad calls to ask when I am going to get pregnant because my 19 year old sister is now pregnant, who was on birth control and just started dating her BF. Thanks dad you are awesome. He then goes "I don't get it, no one is more ready, stable, and should have kids than you and yet everyone else but you gets pregnant". Wow dad, cause I don't know that! I am trying really hard to hold myself together until H gets home and then I will melt down and probably eat my feelings. Some days I really just hate life. Rant over.

TL;DR-my 19 year old sister is unintentionally pregnant and my dad is an ass.

BandM14 · December 2014

@cateyes Yikessss. That is truly horrible of your Dad to be so inconsiderate of your feelings. I'm so sorry

.

pinkdoggie · December 2014

@Rumbera28 - aw man I know that feeling. My 19 year old cousin is KU and I remember a time when I thought she was sooo much younger than me (there is a 6 year difference). I'm sorry you had to feel this way. Being a 3Ter is rough

cateyes543 · December 2014

@rainbowbridge14 and bluefairy5-yep he knows. Actually at one point he said "it just seems so wrong you guys are trying for years and nothing but your siblings don't even have to try." He is such a peach.

TTCBabyJ · December 2014

cateyes543 said:
@rainbowbridge14 and bluefairy5-yep he knows. Actually at one point he said "it just seems so wrong you guys are trying for years and nothing but your siblings don't even have to try." He is such a peach.

Thank you Captain Obvious ! I was hoping at least maybe he didn't know about your IF. I'm so sorry.

SND1231 · December 2014

Sorry I am a little late to add mine but.. This past Friday I went to a Christmas (Ugly Sweater) Party which was the day after my BFN. I was very excited to go because I knew it would keep my mind off things and the invite made it very clear there were to be NO CHILDREN! Well I get there and was not there two minutes before three different people walked in with their infants, 3 months, 3 weeks, and 6 months. I love babies but definitely not what I wanted to be around at that moment. As if this wasn't bad enough my "friend" that I have mentioned a few times before who constantly complains about how horrible pregnancy is and how selfish I am for not going to baby showers.. comes in and hasnt even taken off her jacket before she says "Well it is another girl, I am so mad and disappointed. I will just have to get pregnant again to get the boy that I really want and not another girl." As if that is not bad enough she goes on to tell me that in her anatomy ultrasound that day that the technician was super worried because she was measuring what they thought was 4 weeks behind. She seriously told me that even though they were all so worried about her delay all she could think about was how mad she was that the baby was a girl instead of a boy. It turned out that she is measuring about 2 weeks behind because they had her due date wrong. But she wasn't worried one bit about that because of she wanted a boy. I seriously was furious I barely made it though the party and then ugly cried the whole way home!

theholmanherd · December 2014

I'm avoiding all pregnancy and baby stuff (denial, anyone?), so I'm good for now (seriously, just in denial), but hugs to all of you. Some real peaches this week.

wanderlust508 · December 2014

Wow, I am in disbelief reading some of these. It's the worst when family and some of our closest friends don't try to be sensitive to our pain ...and just drive the knife further in with their comments. Ugh. Big hugs to all of you!

@SND1231 - I'm sorry. That sounds awful! I would have gone to the bathroom and ugly cried at the party probably. How infuriating that your friend not only rubs her pregnancy in your face ....but also that she complains about the baby being a girl when there are more important issues at hand! (((HUGS)))

@triathlete23 - Big hugs to you too. Getting lapped can be so painful. Especially when it's by people who got married so close to when you did. And as if that wasn't enough - how infuriating to find out that people who (I think) are not ready yet/still in school get KU ....while some of us who are financially ready to handle the responsibility on our own don't get the chance.

I have been waiting to share this one since yesterday. My ex boyfriend of 5 years ....the one who I was so sure I would marry and who now WORKS with me and had a baby on the way (I had an AW post about this a few months back). Well, his wife delivered yesterday and he sent a pic of her with the subject "She's finally here". It instantly made me tear up. Her name is Olivia. I love that name. True to form, I TOTALLY overcompensated by responding with a heart felt message telling him how beautiful she is and joking about how I was sure she would have him wrapped around her little finger. And telling him that I was so very happy for him. I actually am happy for him - but you all can understand of course how there's a special kind of pain in seeing an ex get to parenthood before you. I kinda annoyed myself immediately after I hit send with my over the top cheerful message. But I guess that's the mask I hide behind to survive IF (if that makes sense).

cateyes543 · December 2014

@rainbowbridge14, @ldubhawksfan and rumbera28-Thanks for the love! What a day! Sending extra hugs to all who need it!

wanderlust508 · December 2014

@LDubHawksFan - Big (((Hugs)))! That is a lot to deal with. Hope your day goes by pretty quickly and you can relax at home tonight with some wine, chocolate, TV or anything else that makes you happy.

cateyes543 · December 2014

@LDubHawksFan‌-I am so sorry. Sending you extra hugs as that's a super hard way to start the day and I am also sorry it brings up extra hard emotions.

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