Do I have a right to be annoyed?

cndupree15 · December 2014

When my ex boyfriend and I found out we were having a girl we decided within a week that we would name her cadence. We had a blood test gender screening done so we found out at 12 weeks what we were having. Sorry to be long winded just needed alittle back story as to how long we have had this named picked out. My exes best friend is also having a baby. They found out last week they were having a boy. They have decided to name him kayden. I have mentioned that I think the names are very similar. And that they will only be a few months apart. The girl(carrying the baby) seems unconcerned about this.
Normally this wouldn't bother me. I'm not saying no one can name their baby anything close to mine. That's silly. But my other children call them aunt and uncle. The new babies will be growing up around each other.
Do I have a right to be annoyed by this? Should I bring up again how close the names sound? The confusion it could cause? Or should I just drop it?

Angeldcf · December 2014

They are two different names for different sexes. Get over it.

misshart00 · December 2014

I don't think this is an issue at all. Different names. Different spellings. Different sexes. Don't worry about it.

Alygohome · December 2014

Why don't YOU change your name. If it's a such big deal?

lizzybean · December 2014

This is your ex-boyfriend's friend's kid? Seems strange to care. Yeah, you can be annoyed if you want but it isn't going to do you any good! They are two different names.

cndupree15 · December 2014

lizzybean said:
This is your ex-boyfriend's friend's kid? Seems strange to care. Yeah, you can be annoyed if you want but it isn't going to do you any good! They are two different names.

He is also a friend of mine. We have all known each other for years. And my daughter calls him uncle. His kids call me aunt.

@Alygohome‌ I had the name first

Thanks guys. It just annoyed me because she originally was going to name her baby Alan if it was a boy. Then she changed it and I found it strange.

[Deleted User] · December 2014

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cndupree15 · December 2014

@thedish0207‌ I thought I may be. But in my hormonal state I wasn't sure if I was being crazy or actually had any merit. This has helped. Plus I got it off my chest that it was bothering me.

Alygohome · December 2014

And how do you think the convo would go? Dear friends, you are naming you kid a name too close to the name I picked. It bothers me but since I picked the name first I would like you to change your name,Thanks for understanding.

(No that wouldn't make you sound crazy at all)

cndupree15 · December 2014

@Alygohome‌ we never said I wasn't crazy. Lol. They may expect it from me. I did mention that they sounded similar but I haven't showed my butt or anything about it. I mainly voiced my concerns to my ex.
I forgot to mention she picked the name because she looked up the meaning and it means swamp or marshlands. They are big florida gator fans. Our friend say "see he's a gator fan by birth" That's the only part I find funny. And a very unusual way to pick a name.

cndupree15 · December 2014

@lizzybean‌ when I say my ex I don't mean an ex from years ago. I mean the father of the child I'm pregnant with.
Just didn't want you to think I was some super pyscho that thought I had claim to all things similar to my baby name.

chicagojackie · December 2014

You don't actually "claim" any name until it's on the birth certificate. Even then, everyone gets to name their kid what they want.

Don't borrow trouble.

cndupree15 · December 2014

chicagojackie said:
You don't actually "claim" any name until it's on the birth certificate. Even then, everyone gets to name their kid what they want.

Don't borrow trouble.

I said I didn't think I had "claim" I know she has as much right to name her baby anything she wants just like I have that same right.

chicagojackie · December 2014

I think you're creating a problem that doesn't exist.

cndupree15 · December 2014

chicagojackie said:
I think you're creating a problem that doesn't exist.

Oh I'm over it now that I got it out of my system. Hearing from others that it wasn't as big of a deal as my pregnant hormones made it seem in my head and I've moved on.
They will probably end up giving him a nickname anyways.

[Deleted User] · December 2014

The user and all related content has been deleted.

karlimonster · December 2014

Meh, don't sweat it. I'm 100% in the "name your kid whatever you want to call them" club. Plus it might be kind of cute if they are growing up together, etc.

chickyclg · December 2014

Honestly things like this get under my skin really bad. It's not even the same name, FWIW I have a friend that has a daughter named the same as what we are naming our daughter. She got a little annoyed at first saying we "stole" her daughters name and I told her to get over it because we are naming our little girl for her lifetime.

Guess what you can't get pissy every time you see a kid that has the same name as yours, this is just a "grow up" moment you need to have. Right now you are sounding a lot like those highschool girls that claim everyone is "copying" their every little move and action.

I'm honestly not trying to come off sounding rude, but you have absolutely no right to be annoyed, and you need to get over it.

CogDis · December 2014

@cndupree15‌ sorry to beat a dead horse, I'm not writing the stuff below to you, just responding to responses.

@chickyclg‌
I totally agree with you about how similar the mentality between highschool girls and the "I claim a name" thing. I feel like a name is stolen if it is a totally made up name, like Spatuella or some crap, but all the other names are fair game to everyone, whether they hear it for the first time from their best friend or they find it in a name book.

That said, I understand that people would feel disappointed when they think they found a unique name and it turns out not to be special in that way.

Izzy0927 · December 2014

I mean, anyone has the right to be annoyed about anything, but that doesn't mean it's a good use of your mental energy. I'm 100% on team "this doesn't matter even a little bit."

mom2xover2002 · December 2014

So doesn't matter!! We have a Courtney, Candace, Carly, & almost had a Caryn all hard C's in our family with the last 3 being born in an 18-24 month span. (Those are siblings and cousins). It's like PP's have said, different gender, different spellings.

crystalw88 · December 2014

They can name their child whatever they choose, even if it's Cadence. Unfortunately you can not control that. If you feel the names are too close, consider changing yours whether or not you had picked your name out first or not. Asking them to change their name is completely rude. You've mentioned them being a bit close before, now drop it. Sit on it for a few days and reevaluate. You'll probably conclude you were just annoyed and overreacted.

erobbins09 · December 2014

Even if they were the same sex with identical names, I am the age of every boy being named "Matt" and every girl was "jessica" or "Nicole" etc and I have zero memories of the kids having an issue with it. So they get a nickname or the first letter of their last name associated with them. Big deal. You constantly meet new people in life, some will have your name (I actually like meeting other Elizabeth's and extra love meeting Beth's since most people go by liz/lizzy) and you and those people may have a falling out and never speak again. You don't know. Naming your child for "their lifetime" is a great thought, PP.

This is a lot of energy over two names that are nms anyway

mishka29 · December 2014

Personally, this would annoy me bc it seems like once they heard the name you chose it put the idea in their head. This is why people shouldn't share names if they are sensitive about same or similar sounding names. Either way people are going to do as they please so be annoyed then move on.

If I were you, I'd actually come up with a new name altogether as more of a f u to baby daddy. But I'm spiteful like that.

cndupree15 · December 2014

mishka29 said:
Personally, this would annoy me bc it seems like once they heard the name you chose it put the idea in their head. This is why people shouldn't share names if they are sensitive about same or similar sounding names. Either way people are going to do as they please so be annoyed then move on.

If I were you, I'd actually come up with a new name altogether as more of a f u to baby daddy. But I'm spiteful like that.

I changed her middle name because he is the one that picked it and I was made. But I picked cadence. So I want to keep it. Plus EVERYTHING she has is monogrammed already. So no going back for me. I'm committed to the name. Lol.
She just found out what she is having so maybe she will decide on something different. It wasn't that I thought she couldn't name her baby anything close to mine. I just was alittle annoyed that she has said for years that if she had a baby it would be Alan. And then she changed it. I know she has a right to name him anything.
@erobbins09‌ you are lucky to get to meet people with the same name as you. I would totally be thrilled to meet a Chanel. I have never met another one. But I'm from a small town so the chances are low I will.

erobbins09 · December 2014

@cndupree15‌ right so maybe it's not that big of a deal if they are similar then since it sounds like you wouldn't mind knowing other Chanels in the world..

srcr2011 · December 2014

You are way over reacting to this. No one "owns" a name.

PeaceofKia · December 2014

You sound a little controlling...a name is a name. If you love yours, keep it. If she loves her, leave it alone. No harm done, they're two different people, different sexes, and not really related. No biggie.

lorifromwi · December 2014

chicagojackie said:

You don't actually "claim" any name until it's on the birth certificate. Even then, everyone gets to name their kid what they want. Don't borrow trouble.

I need to use this more often...so many people are doing it!

CogDis · December 2014

@mishka29‌

I love your spite! I'm incredibly spiteful, too! I'm aware it is a problem sometimes so I make sure to make fun of myself for it in front of DH and I acknowledge when I do things out of spite. Anyway, even though I disagree with this particular issue, I totally agree with your hypothetical reaction! Lol :-)

HerHighness · December 2014

acpruchnik · December 2014

erobbins09 said:

Even if they were the same sex with identical names, I am the age of every boy being named "Matt" and every girl was "jessica" or "Nicole" etc and I have zero memories of the kids having an issue with it. So they get a nickname or the first letter of their last name associated with them. Big deal. You constantly meet new people in life, some will have your name (I actually like meeting other Elizabeth's and extra love meeting Beth's since most people go by liz/lizzy) and you and those people may have a falling out and never speak again. You don't know. Naming your child for "their lifetime" is a great thought, PP. This is a lot of energy over two names that are nms anyway

Totally off topic, but if Jon had been a girl then her name would have been Elizabeth Amy

My best friend is Elizabeth Marie and my sister is Sarah Elizabeth

Big fans of that name in our house!

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