Do i need a therapy ?? I am so stressed out... — The Bump
Babies: 6 - 9 Months

Do i need a therapy ?? I am so stressed out...

hi...its been 8.5 months since I've had my first baby. I've been struggling all these months to keep myself calm and relaxed. Been off work since I've been pregnant. Now a full time stay at home mom. 

Am I stressed out because I cant stop worrying about how little my baby is (though she is active healthy and mobile), she is just 16lbs and skinny. Does not eat or drink much. She has banana, avocado and all good food allergies (pooping and throwing up). And I end up feeding her only what she can handle - barely about 24oz a day and few spoons of solids.

How do I keep myself calm, happy and relaxed. ( My husband is not home from 8am-8pm, so everything is on me.)

Thanks much !!





 

Re: Do i need a therapy ?? I am so stressed out...

  • My daughter has acid reflux, she cant even eat baby food plain. I had the same problem. Try to mix the baby food with the formula or milk. try to put cereal in the bottle as well. hope this helps!
  • What does your doctor say about your baby's weight and eating habits? Have you been taking any time for yourself to do something you enjoy? I know you said your husband isn't home most of the day, but do you have any trusted family members nearby or is there maybe a baby/mom activity class that you could try in your area? 

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  • Your baby's weight doesn't seem that small to me.  But I'm not her doctor and it's their opinion that matters.  My DS has reflux and we have him on Prevacid.  Without it he cannot eat at all without pain.  On it he can eat most things with limited dairy.  

    I think you need to talk to your Pedi about your LO.  If you are concerned about allergies they can do some testing.  I didn't do formula so I have no idea if 24 oz is enough but it seems like it.  I think an appt with the Pedi would be good for you so you can stop stressing over what isn't a big issue.
  • mcgeevamcgeeva member
    edited October 2014
    My lo is 15 pounds and 7 months old. Bad silent reflux and eats around 24 oz of bm a day and we have only worked up to one food a day at night. Seems fine to me for size or your pedi would tell you and set up an action plan for food etc. What makes you think your baby has allergies? Mine pukes up food and milk due to the reflux. Is your lo getting hives all over? My first would get hives from certain foods like Mandarin oranges, sauce so I would wait a month and try again. Then it seemed to go away.  

    If you are feeling overwhelmed with just having a large load of taking care of the baby by yourself all the time that is 100% understandable. I would suggest mommy day out, play dates etc. Things to get you out of the house and so you can talk to other stay at home mom's going through the same chalenges. 

    Married: 5/09 ~ TTC Since: 10/10 ~ PCOS ~ Progesterone from 10/10 - 2/11 ~ HSG on 3/18 - Clear ~ Started Metformin 1000mg & Clomid 50mg 2/11 ~ Metformin upped to 1500mg 4/6 ~ 6/7 Now going to SG and put on Clomid, Ovidrel, Gonal F, Prometrium, Estrace ~ IUI #1 7/2 = BFP!!!!!! March 6th our little man was born. 

    6/17/13 - Ovidrel, Follistim, Prometrium ~ IUI #1 7/2 = BFP! March 17th our St. Pattys day baby arrived

    10/29/17 - Started process for IVF, got pregnant & miscarried a 2nd time since summer. 2/22 started stims - Menopur, Gonal F, Cetrotide - retrieval 3/6 - , PIO, estrace 3xday - FET 4/18 = Beta 1: 616; Beta 2: 1342 = BFP 

  • I agree you should speak to your pedi. If she is staying on her growth curve her weight is probably fine, some babies are just small. My LO was barely 16 pounds at 8 months, but she is staying on her 10 percentile curve. Being a first time mom is hard, make sure you are taking some time for yourself, even if it's just a 15 minute hot bath and glass of wine when she goes to bed.
  • It sounds like you could use some days off to recenter on your needs. If that means going to see a therapist, try it out and see if they can give you some tools to help you to calm yourself. That much time alone in the day and having the full load of responsibility for baby care is enough to make any good mother stressed. You are concerned about your child's growth and you would benefit from a health care professional who can follow up on those concerns (i.e. family doctor, nurse practitioner). I experienced a lot of pain from my delivery and sought out professional help from a physical therapist. I realized a lot of my difficulties relaxing came from that pain I was experiencing. She helped a lot and listened to my concerns and it helped me to be able to talk to someone in confidence. I now sleep better and enjoy my time with my baby more.

    Consider looking into a post-natal doula. They are great at helping out with baby, can help around the house and prioritize mama's rest and recovery. In my experience, they are also great listeners. They come to your house, which is helpful when you are feeling bombarded by baby care.

    Hope that helps!
  • I know when I was on leave, being home alone all day was draining. I would suggest inviting friends and family to come over and watch the baby while you get out of the house. Get a pedicure or massage, anything to relax. Don't worry about your baby's weight unless the doctor says something. My baby is skinny as well. She's not a big eater, just likes to snack throughout the day. Your baby is happy and healthy, and you are doing a great job!
  • Hi there! First of all - HUGS for you!! Sorry you are so stressed about this :(( I think I'm sort of in a similar situation: DD barely eats anything and at 6 month, she is not 15lbs, so I think that by the time she's your DD's age, she'll be about 16lbs too. The most important thing is that they are developing and hitting milestones - some babies (and adults) just need less food, that's what my pedi said. When I feel super stressed about the eating and sleeping issues, I try to remind myself that in due time we'll be worried about dating and driving and bullying and will yearn for the days when we JUST worried about sleep and food :) I hope this helps a little bit... 
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  • Just as far as stress levels go, because I, too, am a first-time SAHM now with a 6 mo. old, I would recommend a mom and baby class if you can find something affordable or a free storytime possibly at a library. I enrolled us at a place called "MyGym" for moms and baby classes when she was 2 months old and we have been going twice a week for 4 months now. It has incredibly helped me with stress, and pass time in the day with the baby. And for my daughter, even her doctor said her motor skills are advanced for her age, she gets all kinds of baby exercises and they get to socialize. But more importantly, you can socialize with other moms. Some moms recommended stores or tips to me that really helped.

    And, as a disclaimer, I am not a "sporty" type of mom, I *loathed* sports and gym growing up but I pushed myself to try this for my daughter, and it has really been a great stress reliever for us both! :) 

    PS: It also tires them out so they take a nice big nap hopefully when you return home! :P
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