Managing preterm labor fears (trigger warning)

pblge · December 2014

I feel like I've seen these threads come up before, but I didn't find them when I did a little digging. Forgive me if this is repetitive. One of the loveliest ladies on PAIF just had her water break (pPROM) at 20 weeks with twins. All hope is not lost, but she's very early and it sounds like the doctors aren't giving her a lot of hope.

I know some of the other ladies here have been through this, too, and my heart breaks for all of you. I know there is no point at which we can be sure we'll have our babies forever.

I don't really know what I'm looking for with this post, but I'm so scared and worried for her, and for my own LO, and for all of our babies that we have fought so hard to carry. There have always been these fears in the back of my head, but they feel pretty overwhelming right now.

Does anyone have any advice (besides the mantras, which I already re-read) about getting through this scary stage? Or are all the stages scary?

ToriGirl2014 · December 2014

All of the stages are scary. Just continue to lean on us and your best friends IRL and ask for support when you need it.

I hope your friend and her LOs are ok and I hope you start feeling better soon.

taberbtb · December 2014

I have struggled with this as well my whole pregnancy. I just find it hard to believe that this baby might actually come home with us. For me, it has helped to celebrate and look forward to small milestones, our a/s, V-day, etc. Each time I reach one of those I breathe a small sigh of relief and set my sights on the next one.

ETA: (((Hugs)))

intheplanningstage · December 2014

Both of my losses were first trimester, so that time was the worst for me personally. However, because I have a blood clotting disease, "late losses" are more frequent than normal people. So I'm always worried. V-Day, at 24 weeks, was a HUGE sigh of relief for me. Read about your baby's progress each week online-that helps me. For example, today at 26 weeks I read "If your baby is born early, he or she stands a high chance of survival with a specialist". For some people that may be depressing but I welcome " a high chance of survival" with arms wide open!

Samuelismomma · December 2014

I had first trimester losses and was a wreck. Then preterm labor with both DS and this pg so I started looking toward milestones and looking up chance of survival each week. Like pp I welcome high chance of survival with open arms. I don't think the worry ever ends, even after they are born! Big hugs...here for you!

pblge · December 2014

Thanks to all of you. ((hugs)) This is such a difficult topic to talk about, but I needed some encouragement because I was in tears and so scared for my bump buddy. She and the babies are still hanging on okay, so I may be asking for advice soon about care packages for long term bed rest.

I must say that the more I read about "v-day" the less positive I feel about it. From what I've seen it's the day your baby has a slightly better than 50% chance of survival, and that's including a TON of long term care that may or may not have permanent repercussions. Terrifying. 28 weeks is where the outlook starts to get a lot better, and that still seems so far away!

Anyway, thanks again. ((hugs))

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