GTKY: BFF Edition

Davie813 · December 2014

I'm currently waiting for my RE to call with updates on my fertilized eggs and to confirm my 5-day transfer or re-schedule for 3-day, and I'm getting increasingly nervous. What if they all just--caught fire, or something? It could could happen! I need some distraction!

So, besides/in addition to your partner, who is your best friend? How long have you known him/her? Why do you get along so well? And how much/little have you told him/her about your TTC journey?

Davie813 · December 2014

I met my best friend on the first day of first grade. We had the same lunchbox and got them mixed up.

She's very different from me--she's friendly, outgoing, and genuinely likes people. I was born grumpy and suspicious. I think we've gotten along so well for so long because we complement each other, and because we have no problem telling each other when we're being ridiculous--or agreeing that yes, we are. We also had a long falling-out in our early 20s that was ostensibly about something to do with my boyfriend at the time, but was really about the fact that we were starting out on different paths and needed to cultivate some independence. We missed each other terribly, though, and realized that nothing was worth our friendship. It also helps that we're both, objectively, just very weird.

I haven't lived in the same state as she does for ~15 years, but we still see each other a couple of times a year and talk often.

She knows that DH and I are trying, and that we're open to treatments. I think I'm going to tell her about the IVF this weekend.

vh2014 · December 2014

My BFF and I met at work. She's almost 10 years older than me. We get along so well because even though we aren't exactly alike we "get" and accept each other for who we are. We have been through a lot together. We stopped talking for a while because both of us had controlling a-holes for ex H's but as soon as we realized that (at almost the same time separately) we picked up the phone and met for drinks and it was like no time has passed. We've since met great guys who like each other and understand that nothing can come between us. Couldn't go through any of this without her.

She's had 2 losses, one late and one early and because of the risk of another one had her tubes ties. She's been through cancer... and yet she's still the most hopeful, optimistic, supportive person I know. We've planned 2 weddings (hers and mine) in the last year and never once fought and have brought humor to the most stressful times.

As far as what I have shared- everything... more than DH actually. LOL. We have our own funny code words for everything like high school girls and email back and forth. We live about an hour and a half away but talk regularly and stay caught up.

Thanks for posting this... just thinking about it and typing it out really made my day.

wannabmama23 · December 2014

This is an uplifting thread, I love thinking about my BFFs.
I have never had lots of friends but I am blessed to have a few very very close ones. It sort of changes from time to time who I'm closest with, but my BFF is probably someone I met when I moved in with her ex boyfriend (not like that--as a roommate, ha). I was so used to competitive and jealous girls I assumed she wouldn't like me. I knew no one where I moved and she totally took me under her wing. She's super social, hostess extraordinaire, and we can do anything together and have the best time. Even when one or the other is having a rough time, we can end up laughing so hard it hurts.

We now live on the opposite side of the country from where we met, lived in separate states for about six years, and now have ended up back "together" in close proximity. She's been my best support for years and I'm so lucky to have her. She's definitely "my person."

She's adamantly against having kids and so the TTC journey has been a little hard for me and her. She's very supportive and open to me talking about it and lends support, but she really doesn't "get it" like someone who has or wanted kids, I think.
Luckily she puts in the effort regardless (and I have a few of those other awesome women around me who have been through it and love being moms, so I get to lean on them, too).

BFFs are the best!

Austrogermokee · December 2014

I'm close to a family of four sisters. The two oldest were my best friends in high school, and the two youngest are like my own kid sisters. We're now 39, 38 (me), 37, 31 and 29. They call me their fifth sister. We're always in each others business, and DH refers to them as "extra in-laws." I haven't told them much yet about IF, though I think I will soon. IRL, I mostly talk to girlfriends who have gone through something similar.

hooligans4 · December 2014

@Davie813 I'm so excited for you about your transfer. Woo hoo. Grow little embies grow!!!!!

I have one BFF. She is closer to me than any of my 4 sisters.
She was actually best friends with my sister that is 13 months older than me (she is a piece of work). We always hung out as a large group growing up so I have known her since I was little (5 or 6ish).
My sister and her had a falling out when they were in middle school and her and I became closer. By the end middle school we were BFF's.
She is just a genuinely nice person. She is my rock when I need it and she will kick me in the ass when needed.
We have always been there for each other with no judgements.
I think we get along so well because we both accept our differences and we are both just good people.
She knows of my losses and my desire to have another but she doesn't bring it up and I love her for that. She will listen if I need her but I really don't like talking about it.

dream2be3 · December 2014

I have 2 BFF's and consider both as family. One I've know for 15 years. We hit it off right away. We are opposites. She is outgoing and makes friends easily while I am an introvert and have a hard time making new friends. She isn't afraid to say what's on her mind but does it in such a way that she doesn't come across as a b*!Ch. She knows me better than I know myself and I love her for that.

I met my other BFF 5 years ago but it's. Only been in the past 3 years that we've become BFF's. Her husband is my boss and also some I consider to be my BFF. They know the most about my fertility issues and are so supportive. The husband, my boss, called me today because he knew it was my poas test day and wanted to know if it was good news. It wasn't but it was so thoughtful that he remembered and called especially since his mom is in the hospital. His wife was with him when he called so it wasn't just him checking up on me. I love them to death.

Davie813 · December 2014

Thanks, @hooligans4! As far as I know, all the embryos are still growing, and I'm on for my transfer Monday morning at 8:30. Yay!

thirtyninetoforty · December 2014

@Davie813 Good luck Monday

Don't mean to sound dumb but in your siggy, what is 9R, 9M, 9F stand for? Some things still stump me!

I have two best friends - both male and both younger than me. I have known the one for 15 years and the other 3 years. They both know and are both very supportive. They get me and understand I don't trust people and open up completely to everyone and I can make it very hard to be friends with me because I can be difficult with my insecurities but they don't ever give up. I love them dearly and would never give them up!

Davie813 · December 2014

Thanks, @thirtyninetoforty‌! It stands for 9 retrieved, 9 mature, 9 fertilized.

CML11 · December 2014

I have two, the one I've recently mentioned in the other post. I was so shy as a kid and didn't have many friends. My mom set me up on a play date (I was 7) with this girl my mother knew through friends. I dreaded this play date, until I met her, we were instant BFFs. She was so outgoing and extroverted, she showed me how to be silly and more outgoing. She is the one who would sneak me into bars when we were older using the same ID lol. She was the Maid of Honor in my wedding last year.

My other BF and I met when we were 12. She's the type of person that lights up a room when she walks in. We don't talk everyday (she lives on the other side of the country) but when we do it's like no time has past.

meredithcarole · December 2014

I have had many though out my life, and I am still friends with all of them, but my BFF at present (and for the past 9 years) and I met through work. We look similar, are about the same height and build (to the point that in our dating days DH gave her a peck on the cheek from behind thinking it was me - till he saw her face), but we also have very similar senses of humor and irony. She and I have been there for each other and at times we have been closer or more distant, but in the end we are like sisters and I know she has my back.

*pregnancies mentioned*

She knew when I was pg before my husband did. She was there when I miscarried. It was really hard for me when she then got pg and I still hadn't again. But we are there for each other and she knows my journey and I know hers - the good and the bad for both. I am lucky to have her.

[Deleted User] · December 2014

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[Deleted User] · December 2014

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