~~~* Weekly IVF/TTTC/2IF/Infertility grads check-in 12/9 ~~*~

[Deleted User] · December 2014

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[Deleted User] · December 2014

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[Deleted User] · December 2014

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fro88 · December 2014

@Gailseeker14 the porn/corn story just made me literally laugh out loud. My intern is looking at me like I am crazy....

AFM We had our A/S last week. Excited to be team pink, but also very nervous due to some comments the doctor made. Apparently my amniotic fluid is a bit low (not so low that I need to come in for daily monitoring, thank goodness, but I do have to go back next week and then two weeks after that). Also, it seems that baby may have a horseshoe kidney. I have done some research and it seems like 1 in 400 people have horseshoe kidneys, so clearly they are being born and living their lives, but no one ever wants to hear that something is wrong, especially something that may prove to complicate the quality of life of the child (or pregnancy, as this may be the reason that my fluid is lower). It also seems like my placenta is bunched up to one side, so baby looks kind of cramped. All in all it was not the great, light hearted, 'hooray it's a girl' appointment that we were hoping for. We are just trying to focus on the fact that her heartbeat was perfect and that her measurements were all correct, so the fluid and kidney thing are not stunting her growth at this time. Now we wait until the 17th.... I will of course keep everyone posted.

Gift wise, my parents have been extraordinarily generous through our IF journey. They paid for every medication, procedure, appointment, surgery, and visit since the beginning. DH and I could have done it alone, but not for as long (our journey has taken 3 years so far and we would have had to stop after one IVF round). I am incredibly thankful to them every day.

Worst gift is from my SIL. For my 30th birthday (A big one!!) she got me dish towels. That's it. Dish towels with embroidered wine glasses on them. My husband was so furious that he had to excuse himself from the table (for her 30th we got her an Ipad).

yarnymommy · December 2014

@Grailseeker14: Your mom is awesome, sometimes my MIL has no clue either. Love the story with your hubs.

@Caterinac: Disney is awesome. Your adoptive mother is horrific. So sorry you had to live with that.

WARNING, THIS IS LONG - SORRY

AFM, this last week has been really REALLY tough. Not for me physically, but at my house. So I mentioned last week that DH broke his foot on TG running a Turkey Trot 5K. He had surgery this past Thursday to fix it with a screw put in, and he's been resting at home and trying to WFH when he can to try and preserve some PTO for when the babies get here. He has been a complete bear since, never happy, has a short fuse, no patience or ever in a good mood, and curt with me, DS. It just sucks. Top that off with me completely unable to deal with my emotions, and I'm crying all of the time. I just want him to be nice. I get it. I've gone through an ankle break and THREE different surgeries afterwards. I know it is confining, and painful and miserable. But, you'd think he could TRY to stop being a complete douchebag asshat. It isn't our fault that he's hurt, and it makes it SO difficult to want to try and help him, as pathetic as that sounds... I shouldn't be like that.

Last night for example, he was "trying" to "help" DS cut out a paper ornament that was sent home from school that we had to send back today. Yup, homework at 3 years old. Whatever. So, I see him with his hands all over DS, practically doing the cutting for him. When I mentioned to H that we needed to let DS do it himself, he completely flipped the F out on me and started yelling about how I'm such a micromanager and how he didn't need me to question him in front of DS. Now, I did't say "yo, asshole, let the kid do it himself, dipshit". It was exactly "hey Babe, we need to let DS cut on his own, maybe you can let him do a few cuts by himself? if he messes it up, that's ok". He said I was completely rude and nasty and he didn't deserve that. Then he demanded an apology from me. Since he was all amped up, I said "let's talk about this after DS goes to bed" just to stop the yelling. He didn't stop. I finally walked away upstairs with DS to give him a bath and get away from the shouting. When DS was in bed, I told H that we needed to keep the yelling from DS, that after we came upstairs, DS kept asking "Why Daddy yelling at you?" H said it was all my fault and until I apologized, he wouldn't promise anything. If I upset him, he needs to deal with it IMMEDIATELY and things like that just can't wait. I told him it was detrimental for DS to hear this kinda stuff, and I won't tolerate it. Things escalated, and I ended up sleeping on the couch. This morning we didn't really talk, so I'm in a funk today.

Sorry to drone on... it helps to write it all out. I hope we can resolve this today, but with me at work, and H at home, I don't know when that will happen, and then when I get back home, I'll have DS with me and I will NOT risk a discussion with H yelling again. Maybe I'll try to call him when I have some time today. The whole thing just sucks.

QOTW: Best Christmas gift would be two years ago DH bought me my first Le Creuset pot. I LOVE THIS POT! If you don't have one, go out right now and buy one! That year, he also bought me my first Lodge cast iron skillet. Also a must have for any mama that cooks a lot. They are my favorites!

The worst Christmas gift would be from DH, unfortunately. My birth stone is a garnet. One Christmas season he was all nervous about giving me a gift a few days before Christmas. He was nervous because he only had a few days to exchange it if I didn't like it, and he wanted to be sure I could take it back if it wasn't my taste. When I opened it, it was the most gaudy humongous garnet stone ring I've ever seen. It was like a completely tacky cocktail ring a'la Joan Collins on Dynasty (did I just show my age here?). BLECH! Thankfully he was very nice about the whole thing and said "you know, if you don't like it you can just think of it as a fancy gift card. We can go back to the jewelry store and get you something that you like better." We did, and I got a small circle sapphire pendant on a white gold chain that I love.

(see? he hasn't always been an asshat)

pblge · December 2014

Good morning ladies!

@CaterinaC - ((hugs)) I'm so sorry about your adoptive mom. That's pretty terrible. And continuing hugs to you about your friend. And don't worry about messing up the sanding, as I think that's pretty impossible. It's the painting/varnishing that's easy to screw up, but I bet baby won't be picky.

@fro88 - I'm sorry your A/S didn't go smoothly. ((hugs)) It sounds like that's all minor stuff, right? I definitely understand that you don't want to hear any of that, but focusing on the overall healthy picture, which you're doing, seems like the right approach. You and I both have nightmare SILs. Ipad is NOT equivalent to dish towels!

@Grailseeker14 - LOL about the porn!! Good luck on Friday, and I'm so glad you're finally feeling movement!!

@yarnymommy - Sorry your DH is being a pill. Men can be SUCH babies about illnesses and injuries!

AFM, not much new here. Lots of regular movement, and I feel fine, so I assume all is well with the baby.

We're getting a bit more serious about our preparations and watching all the sales for baby items. Major nursery construction (it's still subflooring and unfinished dry wall) began yesterday. I have a check-up next week, but I assume they'll just do their measurements, listen to the heartbeat, and send me on my way. Oh, and we're going to start interviewing doulas this weekend. Pickings are slim, so I really hope we click with the first woman coming.

QOTW: I think the best gift was in my early 20s. I inherited my mother's terrible teeth, and they started falling apart right after college when I no longer had my parents' dental insurance. I had five root canals and seven crowns done, and God only knows how many cavities filled (FYI--they look normal, I'm not haggled toothed or anything). Because I had the typical job of a 23 year old, I had to put everything that my measly insurance didn't cover on low interest credit cards, so I racked up over $5000 in dental bills that would have taken me forever to pay off. Only time in my life I've had credit card debt. For my birthday one year, my grandparents paid it all off. For a early 20s person, this was AMAZING, especially as money has always been stressful for me.

Worst gift was the year my DH forgot to get me anything for my birthday. Seriously, he completely forgot, and forgot that he had forgotten. I don't understand how that could possibly happen, but he seemed genuinely shocked when I told him weeks later how much that had hurt my feelings. He's normally awesome about gifts, but he's really had to step it up since that happened, and even still he may never live it down.

catlover790 · December 2014

@GrailSeeker14‌ I'm sorry you've caught a cold, but yay for lots of feeling movement! Your parents sound like wonderful, supportive people.

Good luck at your AS on Friday!

@CaterinaC‌ Hugs. I bet the dresser will look great! Your best gift trip sounds so fun! I'm so sorry for your tough Christmases, big hugs!

@fro88‌ I'm sorry you're AS didn't go super smoothly. I hope time goes quickly until the next scan and you'll get good news. Towels for a birthday? really? That is definitely a bad gift! At least maybe add some wine to go with the wine glass towels!

@yarnymommy‌ I'm sorry about your H and how he was to you. Has it only been like this during this week? not that I'm justifying his behavior but at least I could kind of understand if he's stuck inside all day. If he is like that more often though, then that's definitely something to have a calm discussion about. Hugs!

@pblge‌ Glad everything is going well for you! How sweet of your grandparents to help with those bills! At least your H is making up for that one year with much more attention now!

@baby_blessings‌ I'm glad you can feel lots of movement too! I love it every time I notice it! GL at your appointment.

My week is going alright; having a little of my anxiety return. TMI, Im having some digestion difficulties and it's causing some cramps. I'm concerned that the cramps could be uterine/Braxton hicks, or something else. I called my OB and they didn't seem concerned since they aren't very strong. I just hope time goes quickly until my AS on Monday so they can check everything! I'm a worry-wart now after I had just gotten to an excited and happy place!

I am getting excited to get the nursery going. We plan to paint next weekend! Also, I'm feeling lots of movement now. This past week I could feel stronger movement and would put my H's hand there and then it would stop. The other day we were parking the car and I felt a strong movement again and my H actually could feel it! it was a very sweet moment!

Best gift: A necklace from my H that he put on a stuffed animal and I didn't even notice it at first! I was like, "awe how cute!" He had to point out the necklace to me!

Worst gift: My MIL bought me a pizza pan and cutter for my birthday once. She said it was still on our registry from our wedding so she got it. It was something we needed but not a great birthday gift!

Seachele98 · December 2014

@GrailSeeker14 and I are twinsies this week! I too received a terrible head/chest cold from my coworker (QOTW: worst gift ever maybe??). Ive only had it for a few days, and so far today is the worst. It's pretty awful! My upside is that I am definitely feeling more baby movement now. It still makes me jump almost every time, but it is such a great relief! We also had our echocardiogram yesterday and her heart looks perfect!! And this time, the doctor gave us some pictures!! YAY! He tried to get a good 3D shot for us, but apparently little girl likes to hang out head down, cuddled up to the placenta. Which explains some pelvic pain Ive had the last week that was worrisome. Doctor said its just her head pushing on things. Whew!

QOTW: Best gift: Mine is the same as @GrailSeeker14 again. My mom gave us the money for our IVF from an inheritance she received. We want to try to pay it back eventually. But without her generosity, this baby would not have been possible. I will forever be grateful!

Worst gift: Pretty much anything my grandparents gave me. Usually, it would be something they got for free with their "player's card points" from a local casino (the lived in Las Vegas). So, coasters with the logo, picture frames with the logo, etc. I never really understood it.

acrotzer · December 2014

It's been a roller coaster of a week! I had a small bleeding scare last Tuesday. I called the doctor and they told me it was my choice whether or not to go in, and so I chose to. I could feel her moving, so I knew she was fine, but I could not stop crying. I don't know how much of this is tied to IF, or if it's just a mom-to-be in general. Either way. I had to wait quite a while, and while I was waiting, I looked at the local news on my phone. I could hear a couple sitting next to me talking about something suspicious, so naturally I wanted to know what they were talking about. I opened the news to find the worst image possible: two of the buses that service my school (I'm a teacher) collided, and one was on its side.

Some of you may have seen on the national news what happened: 2 children and 1 aide died in that crash. I teach in a very small community, and this has shaken us to the core.

They had made all of the men (or non patients in general) go out to the main waiting room due to overflow, so my poor husband. I flew out of the waiting room bawling about the accident, oblivious to the fact that he'd been waiting in a separate waiting room and did not know that I hadn't been seen yet. He had no idea what was going on and thought something was wrong with Novella. Oh my. What a sad, sad day. Our baby is perfectly fine, and they couldn't even find any blood. Even so, I think I finally understand the ongoing, nonstop fear that goes along with parenting. My heart is with the parents of those little girls.

Sorry to bring that up. I haven't really talked about it to anyone outside of my community, and even then it feels like life just moved on right away.

Baby is moving around constantly! I take it for granted, and freak out when it's been a while. Leaving work this afternoon, one of my favorite Christmas songs came on, and I thought "Oh, if you'd just move right now, I'd be in the happiest of places!" And right then she moved!

QOTW- DH is the best gift-giver. I feel inadequate; I just can't top him. It's tough to say the best after 15 years of gifts, but if I must choose, maybe the patent red leather Coach bag. It had been on Oprah's favorite things that year and was impossible to find. He went to great lengths to get it, driving 2 hours back and forth for a couple of days straight just to get it. I think he may have even paid someone extra who had it on hold. He was so excited to give it to me!

Worst- My SIL is German (and therefore, practical) and gives THE weirdest gifts ever. Basically, if she is at your house and sees something that needs replacing, she will buy it for a gift. She gave my other SIL a toilet seat. I got a new shower caddy. Not a cute one or a nice one, just a new one because my other one had gotten a little funky.

[Deleted User] · December 2014

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Canuck13 · December 2014

Hi everyone! Not much going on with me lately. I'm feeling really good, except for trying to sleep comfortably on my side...uggh. I ALWAYS sleep on my back so this is really tough. My AS is next week (finally!!!) so I'm really looking forward to seeing our little one and hopefully hearing a good report. We did find out the sex at 16 weeks (girl) but we will hopefully get confirmation next week too.

QOTW: like others, I'd say my best 'gift' at the moment feels like the money that SO's parents gave us for our IVF (they paid half) since I don't think we could have done it otherwise! Second to that would also be from SO's parents, since a few years ago they got us an amazing trip to Sandals Jamaica for Xmas, which was the most amazing holiday ever!!

Hpearl · December 2014

Hi ladies!

Great news, our beautiful baby girl

is healthy, and my fibroid seems to have shrunk to nearly immeasurable size! I am feeling pretty good overall these days, although bending is becoming not so fun.

Funny moment of the week....my husband finally confessed that my wedge pillow keeps disappearing because he likes sleeping with it between his legs. Apparently it feels comfy on his man parts...which aren't seeing too much action these days so I guess at least they are sleeping comfortably? I adore my husband more and more each day.

)

Sweet moment of the week....feeling baby girl kick! Both my husband and I were totally drained after the 20 week scan. I should have read up ahead of time, but they took a TON of pictures of her heart, and we were both dying inside thinking something was wrong. Turns out it was a positioning issue and everything looks fine. I will NEVER forget the expression on his face when we heard it was a girl, and when he felt her little kick of protest after the scan.

I am loosing track of the blessings lately, so much to be grateful for and so many wonderful experiences to look forward to! As far as the best material gift I have ever received, thanks to my in laws and my husband selling some things he no longer needs, our nursery furniture will be delivered in a few weeks! It was out of my comfortable price range, but my husband just made it happen for us without dipping into savings.

Oh, and I got my bump picture with Santa for the mantel!

stranzm · December 2014

Not a lot new here this week. I also feel the baby daily, which I love. Sometimes, I still don't believe this is happening. My nauseousness has gone away, so I am hoping to stay in this sweet spot for a while!

QOTW:

Best gift was a hot air balloon ride certificate from my DH. It was always on my bucket list, and when I mentioned that to him once he told me I would have to do that with someone else. He doesn't love heights and had no interest. To get that from him was HUGE, and he got it to go with me. He was so nervous, it was cute. I loved it. If you haven't been on one, it is amazing how smooth it is!

Worst gift: All I have to say is wow, I feel fortunate. I can't think of one. The best I can come up with is when back in my dating days. One guy couldn't see me until the day after my birthday. He took me to a local place for ice cream. They only accept cash, so I ended up having to pay!

menzermiracle · December 2014

Hi everyone I am new here! I feel so incredibly blessed to be pregnant after a round of ivf and two FET! Third time was a charm and we are having a healthy little boy we are naming Crawford! Me and hubby are so happy! Pregnancy has been rough I had really bad morning sickness until week 16 and ended up losing 20 lbs because of it. Week 16 through 21 were amazing! I started to feel him move around at around week 18/19! Every time he moves I just wanna giggle with excitement! It is such a miracle! For the past two weeks I have been dealing with some pretty bad sciatic nerve pain, making it hard to sleep and work ( I am a nanny, so being able to move is important). With that being said the pain is worth it if I get to experience the joys of motherhood! I think this board is great, it's nice to talk to other ladies who had difficulty in getting pregnant! Ladies who know it take more then "just relaxing" for some people to become a mom! I look forward to posting in the future!

Haley612 · December 2014

I'm doing okay this week, but having increased anxiety, about the baby in general, about possible preterm labor, and other non-pregnancy-related parts of my life.

Also dealing with some family issues which may be contributing to it. Been visiting my brother this week who is having serious financial issues, employment problems, major relationship problems, and issues with his daughter, so that's definitely made me worried and stressed for him.

I'm going to try to relax and do some yoga and meditation when I get home to see if that helps. It's definitely not helping that it's the holidays with so much family time, so hoping things will pass somewhat after that.

QOTW:

Best gift - an engagement ring, which really wasn't about the ring, but about the proposal of marriage to my husband part

Worst gift - I'm one of those strange people who actually really doesn't like gifts, giving or receiving. I would have to say the worst ones are the very expensive and completely impractical ones that have expectations tied to them (usually from my MIL - seems like a common theme here!). She gave me a bikini as an engagement gift (I don't even have words for how weird that is), and a very expensive bracelet that I hate (NMS, and I don't even wear bracelets). Every time I see her I have to wear the bracelet or she will ask me where it is. It literally feels like a handcuff (it's very heavy). Plus I feel guilty that it was so expensive and I hate it. Such a waste

Alicia_R1 · December 2014

We had our 23 week OB appt yesterday. It went well, though he thought my uterus was higher than it should be, but the measurement was ok. Probably because I have a short torso. She kicked as he was trying to get her heartbeat, pretty much right where the doppler probe was on my stomach. DH can see her kicking and moving around now.

Our OB seemed a bit confused when I asked him about the crazy madness inducing thirst I have and how with all the water I drink I still feel parched (to put it very mildly). I can chug 2 bottles of water and still be like "OMG, NEED WATER, GOING TO DIE!!!" And how I could happily chug an entire gallon of apple juice. So we moved up my bloodwork that he was going to schedule next time.

Our basement looks so transformed, I can't wait to be able to set up the spare room down there and then get Hayley's room ready. DH just works so hard, and I wish I knew what I could get to say thank you. He still has sanding and painting to do and I know he wants to get trim done in the spare room. So maybe in January we can start on the nursery.

QOTW:

Best gift: it was a large stuffed snow leopard that DH got for me last Christmas. I love him and when I feel sad I will cuddle with him and have been known to sleep with him when DH is away.

Worst gift: I am sure there were worse than this that I have had, but the one that comes to mind is the electronic list make DH got me. I hate using it, I like writing lists. He got it because he saw that I made lists for groceries and his sisters and mom have them and love them...It is back in the box, and really I need to ebay it or something. I just really prefer writing my lists (for everything) on paper.

keifekm · December 2014

Not much new to report this week. We have our echo on Monday. FX that baby boy looks good

Worst gift: my mother in law got me a spa towel warmer one year. It is such a sweet thought but we have a large bathroom and all of the plugs are far from the shower. So... I guess I could leave the shower and run across the bathroom for my warm towel?? Anyways it is sitting in a corner because I hate to get rid of it but obviously can't use it.

Best Gift: I personally love jewelry. It makes me feel good that someday I can give my jewelry to DD too. In this day and age I feel like there isn't much worth passing down to our kids since furniture, clothing etc is usually mass produced and not heirloom quality. I just wish DH and I were crafty enough to make furniture or something worthwhile for our kids to have and pass down.

I hope everyone has a great weekend!

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