So that happened

[Deleted User] · December 2014

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Stormy61 · December 2014

Nothing embarrassing yet but I refuse to buy new bras this early and when I take my shirt off in the bathroom I notice in the mirror that my left nipple has escaped from the bra. The right boob still fits (just a little spillage).

mommacandi · December 2014

JimBobCooter said:

So this morning, in court, when it was my turn to stand up and address the judge I took a deep breath in exactly the right manner that my giant, porn sized bazooms heaved mightily, causing the front closure on my bra to pop open. I was wearing a very blousey shirt with a cardigan over it so no one else noticed, but I had to finish my hearing, about 30 more minutes, sitting there, painfully aware that my girls had broken loose and were roaming free.

Please share your own embarrassing, pregnancy tales of woe

This made me laugh so hard...mostly because of how poetically it was written. Hahaha!!

housewifebecomesher · December 2014

I'm sure I'll think of something to share later, but I just know when @JimBobCooter posts, I gotta open it up and read. Never fails to entertain

I've totally been there (last pregnancy) but I don't remember the circumstances. It must be on the long list of painful memories I've blocked out from last pregnancy. When those things keep happening again, I am reminded.

tiffbot1985 · December 2014

Oh no!!! Oh man I'm sorry I'm only kind of laughing because it wasn't me!!

blastocarrier30 · December 2014

Mine feels mild in comparison, but even after asking DH what the weather was going to be today, I managed to leave the house without a coat or scarf or anything. Of course it is freezing in my office today, too AND it's pouring down rain.

I can only hope it stops before I leave, so my hair doesn't get destroyed. I NEVER take the time to do my hair, but I did today because we're going out to dinner for our anniversary (2 years today!) and I wanted it to look presentable. Pregnancy brain has taken care of that, and the rest of pregnancy makes sure I can't wear any of my nice clothes. I'm *this* close to just calling it, ordering pizza, and watching Blacklist on the couch in my pajamas instead of going out.

beckynsean11 · December 2014

Laurenlou83 said:

sensitivesally said:

Also, I think we need a weekly "2JimBobCooter's Weekly Shenanigans and other Musings" thread. You have the BEST stories!

TOTALLY agree!!!!

Motion carried!

/gavel

littlechemist · December 2014

Ok, I could only read the first 3 posts before bursting out laughing (in the middle of a meeting at work) so I had to stop. I'll be back to read more but THANK YOU for that amusement!

awheeler4311 · December 2014

Hahaha @JimBobCooter‌ how wonderfully written! I can only imagine.

Mine fortunately wasn't in public, but I was talking to my H and I go "hold on I to have to sneeze", to which I proceed to sneeze fart. Literally sneezed and loudly farted at the same time... OMG I was mortified (even though we are not bashful about bodily fluids in our household). To which my husband looked at me and said "oh you've never snarted?" Lol. We obviously had a good laugh at what the future of this pregnancy entails.

Ladymouse · December 2014

Just my boobs half escaping. The one that DS isn't nursing from leaks colostrum is the one that does it most often, so it's extra embarrassing. Also, I'm between underwear sizes, apparently, and they fall off if I wear a skirt.

Katerina&Baby · December 2014

@emilyzemily‌ - I feel your pain. I've been fighting a cold since Thanksgiving and although I've definitely snissed a tiny bit, this morning I was walking to the bathroom and let out this HUGE sneeze and peed so much that it literally hit the floor. Even my dogs looked at me like "WTF?". So mortifying.

finchfeeder80 · December 2014

Sneezing is a crap shoot for me these days. I had no idea it would be this bad so early. I thought all that was post delivery. Apparently not.

Elley1486 · December 2014

Sniss...I am dying over here! You guys are too much.

I haven't had anything happen publicly yet, but I did cough and pee a little the other night. It was demoralizing. I too thought it was not supposed to happen until after the birth...WTH.

awheeler4311 · December 2014

I have never heard of sniss!! That is hilarious.

erbear84 · December 2014

@awheeler4311, I've totally done the sneezefart! I also had a hunk of snot fly out of my nose while doing it, too. My H laughed for five minutes, that jerk.

KimberlyandThor2014 · December 2014

mommacandi said:

JimBobCooter said:

So this morning, in court, when it was my turn to stand up and address the judge I took a deep breath in exactly the right manner that my giant, porn sized bazooms heaved mightily, causing the front closure on my bra to pop open. I was wearing a very blousey shirt with a cardigan over it so no one else noticed, but I had to finish my hearing, about 30 more minutes, sitting there, painfully aware that my girls had broken loose and were roaming free.

Please share your own embarrassing, pregnancy tales of woe

This made me laugh so hard...mostly because of how poetically it was written. Hahaha!!

Yup! Beautiful! Lol!!

GASuzuki · December 2014

Nothing yet. Probably because I wear boring maternity clothes already! LOL!

jbartsy · December 2014

I posted about this before, and it isn't body related, but definitely pregnancy brain related.

Last week when I was leaving for work, I hopped in my car, started to back out of the driveway, and... BANG. I was so confused - what could I have hit? Oh, just DH's SUV parked behind me that I apparently failed to notice.

My neighbor was standing on his porch and saw the whole thing. Mortified. And now I get to pay $400 to get my bumper fixed.

And I empathize with all you snissers and snarters. Even worse is when you sniss and snart at the same time... a snissart?

blu-eyedwife · December 2014

I'm hardly ever the first person at the office. But one morning I was. No big deal, I unlock the door and head over to the panel to input the code to turn off the alarm.

Wrong code.

Try again. Still wrong code.

After several attempts the alarm goes off. Security company calls to see if everything is fine. It is, but I have no idea what the code is. I'm not listed as on their sheet as a "safe" person, and I have no idea what the confirmation word is. So they have to call the owner of the building to let them know what's going on, and then call me to tell me to give him a call. All the while the alarm is going off.

Turns out I was missing a number in the middle of the code. I thought it was 3 digits, it was 4.

apeschka · December 2014

Omg that story was epic!! As a female attorney myself I can only imagine how awkward that truly was.

cnoelle92 · December 2014

My boyfriend's friend was having a get together a few days after Thanksgiving. It was my first time meeting this group of friends, so of course I wanted to make a good impression. While we were all sitting in the living room having a conversation, I had a sneezing attack and I totally peed myself, not just a little, but emptied my bladder. I was so embarrassed!

suzysurparis · December 2014

I snissed before I was pregnant. And fell out of bras. And farted quite a bit (French cheese). Apart from the snissing being a little more common, I havent had anything new and embarrassing happen yet. I'm just embarrassing naturally. My poor DH.

Schnurette · December 2014

This is my new favourite legal story lol

Not embarassing so much as depressing...I was shopping with DD the other day and when I got out of the car I zipped up my coat...recently I've had to suck in my belly a little to do it butbthe coat hasn't felt like it was straining so I figured it was fine.

Well...I let out the breath I was holding and my zipper...exploded. It just burst open, right there on the sidewalk and then, of course, it was stuck shut at the top and bottom where the two zipper pulls were (with my blump sticking out in the middle) and I was standing on the sidewalk trying to wrestle my zippers open so I could at least look relatively normal.

Even DD seemed embarassed for me.

suzysurparis · December 2014

@schnurette the same thing happened with my coat on Sunday, but we were at home. I'm not yet blaming the blump though, I switched my under-sweater from a snug jacket to an extra-large hoodie. I think the coat just couldnt handle all that fabric. The stupid thing I did was after DH helped me get the zipper off/down, I immediately tried to zip it back up. So again it split (if less dramatically) and he left me on my own to try and get it off. I eventually pulled it over my head.

Schnurette · December 2014

suzysurparis said:

@schnurette the same thing happened with my coat on Sunday, but we were at home. I'm not yet blaming the blump though, I switched my under-sweater from a snug jacket to an extra-large hoodie. I think the coat just couldnt handle all that fabric. The stupid thing I did was after DH helped me get the zipper off/down, I immediately tried to zip it back up. So again it split (if less dramatically) and he left me on my own to try and get it off. I eventually pulled it over my head.

I did have a bulky sweater...so it might have been that. The coat really didn't feel like it was struggling at all being done up lol I also think the zipper might have been a pretty poor quality one so I might see if I can get it replaced since the coat is super warm.

I honest to god thought I was going to have to go into a store and ask them to cut me out of it, like the jaws of life lol...it was zipped too high to fit over my head

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