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Does dc's ncp wash clothes before sending them back?

belle204belle204 member
in Blended Families

When I picked dd up I was looking through her bag and her dad didn't wash her dirty clothes. (this was her first visit with him) In fact, he sent back pjs she had wet and put them in the same bag with some other clothes. Is it really that hard to wash them? Maybe I'm just being anal...

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Re: Does dc's ncp wash clothes before sending them back?

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    karomekarome

    We always send clothes back washed and folded. 

    On the other hand, they never come with clean clothes.  And often are sent with clothes with holes that are too small.  BM does it so we send them home with all new clothing.

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    hindsight's_a_biotchhindsight's_a_biotch member
    He always sent them back, not just dirty but filthy and stained, the shoes with an inch or more of dirt in them, even her church shoes. So I stopped sending clothes all together. She goes in the outfit she has on and that's it. It's up to him to keep some clothes on hand for her. I got tired of going through all that effort and not getting any returned.


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    mom2onemom2one member
    Usually no...but DS isn't there for very long so I don't really expect him to. Usually he keeps the good stuff and sends back something older I've forgotten about already. lol.
    Stay at Home Mama to 3 Beautiful Children by the miracles of Birth & Adoption
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    kristin329kristin329
    My daughters father would never wash her clothes. She would always come home laundrey for me to wash. 
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    Mrs.Astros_FanMrs.Astros_Fan
    In the 8 years since our divorce, my ex has never washed clothes before sending them back.  I'm lucky if the kids brush their teeth/hair when they are with him.  Seriously.
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    J+RJ+R

    Ugh, when we used to get SD for the summers... her mother would send her with clothes that were way to small (Umm, a girls size 14 and her mother would sent a size 8/10) forcing us to buy an entire new wardrobe...

    Maybe just ask nicely next time? Or tell him how much you would appreciate it, etc.

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    RAN070508RAN070508

    When BM used to send clothes with my SS we always made sure to wash them and send them back clean.  However for the last year she hasn't sent anything with him other then the clothes he is wearing when we pick him up.  We wash those and send him back in them.

    I think it is just good manners to send them back clean.

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    packer_fanpacker_fan
    We have the reverse problem. My SD comes to our house from her Mom's in clothes that are to small, doesnt send stuff back.  When we ask for it back she tells us its in the wash and months later we will get a garbage bag full of clothes that are now a size or 2 to small. My SD wears a 7/8, her mom recently sent clothes back that were a 4T and a 6. I get more upset about it than my husband does. I guess we all have the same problems. The relationship with BM is very rocky, sometimes shes sane, but mostly nuts!
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    belle204belle204 member

    Thanks everyone. I'm still a bit new at this visiting thing and just want to make sure I'm not being too unreasonable. I might not have cared if the clothes hadn't been so freakin' wet and pissy.

    He didn't comb her hair (a little ponytail or puff is not that hard) and her toothbrush was unopened too (don't know if he bought a diff. one and used that or not). I told myself he's a guy and guys don't think about this stuff. I'm just going to let it go for right now.

    Thanks again.

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    knmommyknmommy
    Nope, mine doesn't.  I send clothes but he isn't allowed to wear the clothes he brings.  They have their own.  He tells me that on Sundays, before he comes home he has to put our clothes on.  (so he changes 3x on Sundays.) 
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    xmaryrickxxmaryrickx member
    SS is only ever at our house for the weekend, so unless something tragic happens (mud puddle) I do not wash his clothes. I work 40+hours a week, and do laundry on Thursdays-I do not start the washer otherwise. MIght be bitchy, but I really don't care.
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    anniya77anniya77

    We're really good about sending clothes that belong at specific houses back to that specific house-- however, I used to make an effort to wash all his clothes and send them back clean with him. But BM was sending clothes that she would have for TWO WEEKS back dirty without washing them. SO I stopped.

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    Mrs.SesaMrs.Sesa

    No. BM never use to wash them..much less give them back. When we would pick up Suzy. Suzy would be in too small of clothes of really big boy clothes. BM "claimed" that our clothes were in the washer. But we would hound her and hound her for them...we'd get them back still dirty about 2 weeks.

     

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    hindsight's_a_biotchhindsight's_a_biotch member

    I picked pinky up today and she was wearing the same clothes I sent her in. Which is what is supposed to happen. However, they had a spill on them from the day I sent her. So he packed her up this morning and put her in dirty clothes to give her back.

    Oh well. At least she had on clean undies.

    :sigh:



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    kjandersonkjanderson

    H3LL no!  I'm lucky if I get back half of the clothes that I sent.  I'm still waiting for DS's winter coat from SATURDAY that hasn't been returned.  So washed clothes?  Ha!

     Good luck!

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    PMBridetobePMBridetobe member

    My DH always sends SD back with clean clothes and SD says she doesnt know why we do it since Mommy just puts them all in the wash as soon as she gets home so it is a waste for us to do it.

     Well, whatever - it is the right thing to do. She came in clean clothes, she needs to go back in clean clothes.

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    ade2beade2be

    We try to wash my SK's clothes but his daughters are 12 and 13 and don't want daddy washing their underwear.  So we're lucky if we get a pair of pants out of the deal when we ask for their dirty clothes to wash.

     They rarley show up with appropriate clothes anyways.  It was 10 degrees this weekend and they showed up without a coat. 

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