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February 2015 Moms
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Sigh... anxiety (sorry if redundant)

loriann091loriann091 member
in February 2015 Moms
It's been awhile since I've been on TB so I'm not sure if anyone's posted something similar (and it's very time consuming to search on my phone since the app is wack). I apologize if I'm being annoyingly repetitive.

Anyway, I'm a FTM and DH and I live 1,000s of miles away from any family or close friends. It's literally just us here. I'm having a lot of concerns about 1) preparing for the baby (idk wtf to do!!!), 2) dealing with personal postpartum stuff and 3) having a newborn with absolutely no one nearby (esp when DH goes back to work).

That being said - if you could give ANY piece of advice, what would it be? Even if it's: "chill the eff out, things will be fine," that's helpful :)
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Re: Sigh... anxiety (sorry if redundant)

  • Jensoprano82Jensoprano82 member
    Maybe take a prenatal yoga class or something so you can meet other soon to be moms and get a support system going? Bonus: a lot of them will be having a second or third baby so they might be able to help you with advice.
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  • loriann091loriann091 member
    seamonster said:

    I'm in a similar situation. 1) prenatal classes and participating here to get ideas and advice. 2) therapy. Ask your OB for a referral. 3) Join a moms group through meet-up and hire help if you need it.

    Is any family planning to come out, even for a week or two?

    Great advice! Thanks! And both our sets of parents are coming right when the baby is born for a week or two, which will help, but then they'll leave.

    What's kind of nice is that there are four other pregnant women at my work and we're all due somewhat around the same time. Two are FTM and two are STM. I know they will be able to help but will also be dealing with their own new babies so I don't wanna drive them crazy.
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  • ordinary1ordinary1 member
    edited December 2014
    You'll be fine. You will get into your own routine. I didn't live as far away as you do from family, but no one came after baby was born to help me and H wasn't able to really take any time off. You figure it out as you go.
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  • krispy83krispy83 member
    Having the other moms due around the same time as you will probably be a huge help - not as far as getting help (obviously they're not going to be bringing meals, etc) but just in terms of sanity and socializing.  The thing I struggled with in the early days with DS was how isolating it could be to have a newborn.  So having other moms who are in a similar situation can really help.  You can meet for coffee or visit each other and it will help you maintain some semblance of normalcy.  Just having a conversation with another adult other than your H can help a lot :)

    I also agree with joining a moms meetup group.  Getting out of the house did wonders for me when DS was tiny.  I'd also suggest prepping freezer meals and such now so that you don't have to worry about meals as much when you have a newborn.

    As for advice and preparing for the baby, the STMs that you work with can probably help a lot.  And there are plenty of STMs here that can help too!  But a lot of it is just kind of figuring it out as you go along.  You'll be fine :)
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