Doctors office concerns

Grapes13 · December 2014

Hi guys, it's been a long time since I've wrote in here, but I had some questions on how everyone is feeling with their doctors office. I'm at 31 weeks today, and I've been going to a office that has multiple OB's (my main doc is my obgyn that I've seen for years) and I get an appt with any of them for all my visits. If I have questions in the mean time I ALWAYS get a voicemail and never a live person. In which someone will call me the next day. Sometimes my visits are so quick that I feel like they are just in concerned with me... I got the chicken pox last month and they didn't seem concerned, and they haven't even talked to me about how the delivery process works. I'm just worried I'm a number and not really cared about. Does anyone else feel like that? Or am I being overly needy?

animalcrckr · December 2014

I would say you're being overly needy.

Have you asked questions at your appointments or are you waiting for them to give you information? What necessarily do you need to know about the delivery process? Are you talking about actual stages of labor? when to go to the hospital? where is L&D? They do not know what you do not know. You need to be proactive, especially when it comes to your own healthcare.

Also, chicken pox in the 3rd trimester is really not a big deal. It would be more so if you were about to deliver but I'm guessing that's not the case. I'm assuming they talked to you about it?

Going forward, I would write down some questions for your next appointment. Do not leave until you get your answers.

toadandbug12 · December 2014

I have only one OB but besides that your experience sounds like mine and I'm completely okay with that. I just got back from my appointment which lasted about a minute long because I had no questions. Like PP said, I think it's good to be proactive and if there is a question you have, make sure to write it down so you don't forget to ask. I've done this before and my doc has always been patient and answered thoroughly. But if I don't ask questions, he doesn't talk about anything specifically.

SaraL1175 · December 2014

That pretty typical for OBs. I switched to a hospital-based midwife practice with my last pregnancy and loved it--More discussion of physical and mental well being, nutrition, family dynamics, etc.

mommaa1615 · December 2014

All of my appointments have been about 5 minutes total. I never have questions though. I hope its normal haha. It would bother me about the phone thing though.

krysmill · December 2014

My Dr visits are always quick. But I always make sure to write down questions if I have them. I also ask what I should be looking forward to till my next appt. I'm choosing not to discuss L&D till my 32 week appt unless she brings it up. I've told her something's I look forward to in l&d!
But the phone service would really bother me. My dr. office calls back pretty promptly if no one picks up.
Good luck.

Mommalawyer · December 2014

I have to agree with PP(s). My visits are usually pretty quick, as well. And I'm borderline high risk. When I call, I always get voicemail. If it is an emergency, I know how to bypass the voicemail and get my OBGYN or her assistant. However, if I do leave a message, I get a call back on that day, or first thing in the morning. Having several doctors in my life at the present time, I find how my OBGYN office behaves. My other doctors, may not even call back. If you feel you need more time with your OBGYN, write down your questions, and ask them. You can't expect to get more face time or have your questions answered if you don't engage. Squeaky wheel gets the oil. Good luck!

magsame · December 2014

I go to a practice that has 5 doctors and you won't know who will be on call when you deliver so they like to you meet all 5 and this far along I have met them all, so I understand that feeling. They give me a quick run down of my charts and listen to the baby so it's pretty quick. They always ask if I have questions and just this last appt I had some so it was a little longer. I'd say jot down anything that you are wondering about to ask. They can't read your mind and its always good to be proactive when it comes to your health and the baby's.

acpruchnik · December 2014

Have you tried calling and requesting an appt just to ask questions? I called and scheduled an appt with my doc just to sit down and discuss questions I had about delivery, the hospital I needed to register at for my VBAC, stuff I was having a mini freakout about. I made sure I wrote down what I needed to ask so I didn't forget anything and it worked out fine for me. There were some things that she told me I would have to ask the hospital about and told me that after a certain week she wanted me to just go to L&D if something came up that concerned me cos she would send me there anyway.

Otherwise, it's like the PPs have said. I spend more time waiting for my appt than the appt lasts. They call me back, weigh me, I pee in the little cup. Nurse takes my BP, asks how I'm feeling and what I'm allergic to or if I'm taking anything new. Doc or PA comes in (I alternate on who I see until my weekly appts), measures my uterus, busts out the doppler and tells me she wants to see me in a few weeks unless something comes up. Pretty much the same deal at my MFM's office, minus the peeing and add an ultrasound. It all takes MAYBE 15 minutes if I stretch it out with questions.

You have to remember they're still a business so they have to run a tight ship and there's a lot more to do than we see. Sucks when you want more attention from them, but the ladies are right in that you have to advocate for yourself and speak up. You are the customer, after all.

t8keepr03 · December 2014

Like other posters my OB appointments are pretty fast and straight forward. If I have a question he will address it throughly but if I don't ask he doesn't know. He will remind me now that I am in 3rd tri what to look for in regards to what labor will look like and when to go to the hospital. As far as what to expect during labor you need to ask. He didn't tell me anything but I took a birthing class. I didn't really have questions as far as the process goes. He asked if I wanted or thought an epidural might be an option because there was a video I had to watch and a form I had to sign. That was all I can remember him really talking about in regards to the labor and delivery process.

nhamic · December 2014

All the PP's comment are why I switched to a midwife practice and have opted for a home birth. She does all my labs, we talk about things, how I'm feeling, how I'm doing, etc. Some appointments are 30 minutes some are over an hour but I like having a relationship with the person who is taking care of me and the delivery of my baby. My husband goes to all my appointments so far as well so he can ask questions and get to know her as well. It's really a personal preference I think. If you are committed to your OB group, go prepared with questions and be proactive. The more people they can schedule each day, the more they bill, and the more they get paid. You have to ask for what you want. If you still don't like the care you're getting, you can always switch care providers

CogDis · December 2014

I have a midwife so my experience is the opposite (appointments are long and she gives tonnes of detail and let's my DH ask questions that I think are best left to google, lol).

However, my experience with GPs (non preg related) has been similar to what you've described.

I've found that like pp's say, it is best to write down your questions. That way if you feel intimidated or rushed you can use the paper as a prompt.

Also, there are lots of great books on pregnancy and labour and delivery that might help you during the wait between phone calls. Maybe getting some of these from your library might be helpful? I find myself in the indexes if my preg books whenever I'm a little uneasy about a symptom or questioning "what's next". It always seems to help me feel more relaxed and prevents me from calling my midwife unnecessarily.

I hope you figure out how to fix this so you feel more confident with your care providers! I'm sure you will!

I hope you're over your chicken pox! That must have sucked while pregnant!

chicagojackie · December 2014

There should also be a child-birthing class at your hospital and a breast-feeding class and CPR/lifesaving classes. These tend to be really great. I also really liked "The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy."

Write down your questions for your OB. Routine questions that are not regarding a serious symptom or problem that warrants a call can be answered in 24-48 hours or at your next appointment. Remember your OB has to see patients in office, deliver patients in hospital, do gyn procedures and surgeries and round on patients in the hospital. They are not just sitting around waiting to answer your questions. You also are going to have way more appointments as you get further along, so bring questions for each time and you'll get it all sorted out. Good luck.

wintersong139 · December 2014

To be honest, some of my midwife appts are like that, too! They have a matrix of stuff they explain each week. (Like, I got my "28 week packet" last appt.) But usually I have no questions, so my visit with the midwife is only about ten minutes long. In general, they expect their mom's to inform themselves and ask whenever they are unsure about something. However, I will say they are always excellent about taking time to answer questions when I do have them.

I like the fact that I am at a practice, like yours, where there are many doctors/midwives on staff. I have the chance to meet them all before the big day, so no matter who is on call from my practice I will know and be comfortable with them.

mands1125 · December 2014

I probably wouldn't switch now but if another child is in the cards for you in the future, you may want to consider a midwife if that is the type of care you are seeking. I am very hands off and do all of my research with friends, family, the Bump, books, etc. So I really have like no questions when I go in and don't really care about being coddled.

Like the others said, make sure to bring a list of your questions to every appointment.

Grapes13 · December 2014

Thank you everyone! I am just glad everyone is experiencing the same thing. I just really didn't know if my experience was different. Most of my immediate questions I do just research on my own or call and wait a day or so for them to get back to me- it was just me having nerves about the L&D and not really knowing what to ask. I had to triage to the hospital the other day since I was having contractions 5 minutes apart for 3 hours! Luckily they slowed down and I was told I am still not in preterm labor- but I needed to rest more! The midwife option seems like something I might be interested in more the next time, but I am comfortable with the OB's office as long as my experience is similar to others. My husband is in the service and has been away my entire pregnancy and we are not even sure if he will be here for the birth- so I think not having him here takes away some of my voice of reason! Lol he is usually always here to calm my nerves, but right now it's a lot of "planning and doing" on my own! Thanks Ladies!!

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