Update - Re: Ultrasound policies question for those in the medical profession

KayDeeKay81 · November 2014

Hi all,

I wanted to throw this question out there to anyone who works in the medical field and may have some insight into the policies that are set in place.

Where I will be getting my U/S done, there is a policy that significant others will be allowed into the U/S room after the mother has gone in alone and the tech has finished with all the measurements.

Background: I have had a couple of losses. The moment I knew there was a problem with the first baby was at the ultrasound.

Since then I have a lot of anxiety about going into the ultrasounds alone. I am a mess and lose all sense of my regularly "Put together, Strong, Confident Self" and I become a blubbering hysterical wreck. After asking during my 12 week U/S if my SO could come with me and I was told no. I tried to explain that I have a lot of anxiety and why. I was again refused due to the policy and I gave up and just started sobbing

SO the question is: What is the real reason this "mother goes in alone" policy is in place and what would be the most appropriate way to express how much it will help me (and the tech) if I could have my SO there holding my hand through the whole thing.

I will be asking my midwife this same question this week to get her opinion and insight but I wondered if anyone else might help give me some ideas

Update: The midwife put in a call and has arranged to have a note placed on my file requesting the SO can come in with me and apparently they agreed this is a huge relief. Thank you for all your support and suggestions

fro88 · November 2014

If my H couldn't come in with me I would be an absolute wreck for the same reasons as you! Previous losses have my anxiety up so high, I need his support from the start of the appointment. I have never heard of such a policy... hopefully you will get some answers (and get some rule bending in your favor!)

jamiesc58 · November 2014

I have also never heard of this! My DH will be with me from start to finish. Our doctor said we can bring our other 2 kids if we want to.

KayDeeKay81 · November 2014

lovemymuttzillas said:

I've never heard of this policy either. Could your midwife help you with requesting that your SO be allowed in with you? Perhaps she has some connections higher up the chain of command and special arrangements could be made before your appt? Is there a different location with a different policy that you could go to?

Yeah, I am really hopeful that she can pull some strings. The U/S is being done is one of the higher grade u/s's rather than the local community type of U/S (I'm told they get a more accurate picture) - We were referred to McMaster Hospital (I live in Canada) because of my history and because we will meet with the genetics counsellor immediately following the U/S so there is no option for a different location unfortunately.

redneckmomma25 · November 2014

I've never heard of this policy. I'm sorry. Hopefully he can come in with you!

MrsRem217 · November 2014

I am a SAHM but before that I was an US tech. While I have seen this policy it is not common. I think the main reason for it is liability. The hospital does not want SO's or family members peppering the tech with questions like "what's that" "can you tell me what you see" etc. Techs are not doctors our job is to take pics of pathology vs normal anatomy and tell the radiologist what we think. The radiologist will then in turn give his diagnosis of the pathology he sees. I am sorry you are having to go though this.

amandamarie2 · November 2014

I also live in Canada and I'm pretty sure you're allowed to have another person with you during any type of medical appointment. I would be pretty insistent if someone told me I couldn't.

Sharon&Paul · November 2014

I work in medicine and have not heard that policy in any of our local hospital. I am in the US. I am unfamiliar with Canadian policies.

c+est+la+vie · November 2014

I am in Canada and my husband and MIL were called in afterwards to see the baby and heartbeat, as per policy. The same is expected for my A/S ultrasound. I didn't ask why. Can't hurt to ask.

KayDeeKay81 · November 2014

snegde said:

Because you are in Canada you are probably stuck. Hopefully they can help you out and bend the rules. If you were in the US I would tell you to find another facility that doesn't have that policy or pay out of pocket for an elective prior to this one. So sorry you are dealing with this. I would ask your midwife if it's possible to have a Doppler check immediately before so there are no major surprise. Hoping everything looks perfect!

Yes. Actually my next midwife was originally scheduled for the afternoon AFTER the U/S but I called and asked for an earlier one in order to be able to have her use the Doppler and perhaps help with easing some of my fears.

[Deleted User] · November 2014

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KayDeeKay81 · November 2014

MrsRem217 said:

I am a SAHM but before that I was an US tech. While I have seen this policy it is not common. I think the main reason for it is liability. The hospital does not want SO's or family members peppering the tech with questions like "what's that" "can you tell me what you see" etc. Techs are not doctors our job is to take pics of pathology vs normal anatomy and tell the radiologist what we think. The radiologist will then in turn give his diagnosis of the pathology he sees. I am sorry you are having to go though this.

Thanks for the input, it's good to hear a possible justification from the other side.

bmblebea · November 2014

That's a terrible policy! Here (US) you can have your so or your mom, whoever you want go with you. I would think that the father of the baby would have a right to be there since it's his baby too. And if something was wrong I'd sure as heck want my husband there with me. I feel like if I was a Canadian father I'd be super pissed about that policy. I hope they let your so in!!

carter604 · November 2014

Hmm. I'm in Canada and DH has accompanied me from start to finish for both ultrasounds we've had (one at a hospital, one at a private clinic). Sounds like a one-off with your office's policy.

Canuck13 · November 2014

I'm in Canada too (Toronto) at a fertility clinic and the policy is the same for me...SO can come in at the end of the appt only. I'm not sure why though, I never asked...I hope you are able to sort it out though, since your situation causes you so much anxiety. Good luck!

rmaurer08 · November 2014

KayDeeKay81 said:
Hi all,
I wanted to throw this question out there to anyone who works in the medical field and may have some insight into the policies that are set in place.
Where I will be getting my U/S done, there is a policy that significant others will be allowed into the U/S room after the mother has gone in alone and the tech has finished with all the measurements.
Background: I have had a couple of losses. The moment I knew there was a problem with the first baby was at the ultrasound.
Since then I have a lot of anxiety about going into the ultrasounds alone. I am a mess and lose all sense of my regularly "Put together, Strong, Confident Self" and I become a blubbering hysterical wreck. After asking during my 12 week U/S if my SO could come with me and I was told no. I tried to explain that I have a lot of anxiety and why. I was again refused due to the policy and I gave up and just started sobbing
SO the question is: What is the real reason this "mother goes in alone" policy is in place and what would be the most appropriate way to express how much it will help me (and the tech) if I could have my SO there holding my hand through the whole thing.
I will be asking my midwife this same question this week to get her opinion and insight but I wondered if anyone else might help give me some ideas

This is the most crazy policy I've ever heard! I'm so sorry for your losses! No advice, but BIG HUGS to you!!!

shauna4608 · November 2014

I also had my anatomy scan at McMaster last week. The tech told me it is because they do a very thorough exam and the tech's need to be able to focus on getting the pictures and info they need, the less people in the room the less distraction and interruption. They are very strict on this policy, unfortunately it's not something you will be able to change. I assume to that it is to keep the appointments moving in a timely manner.. McMaster does a very thorough scan, the tech I had told me an average hospital does 3 heart pictures and they do 10. It's a high demand hospital but definitely the best care.

LindseyRae4 · November 2014

I am a radiology tech in the U.S. and I have never heard of this policy. I have gone through a loss and completely understand why you would want your SO with you. So sorry you are having to go through this!

cwiceangel · November 2014

That's awful! Hell today at my as the tech let my husband and parents in. (We wanted them to know the sex and have us find out with the rest of the family Thursday during our reveal activity.) I figured they'd let one person back and my husband would just switch off with my mom when the sex was being determined. Anyway, Id sure be asking why the hell not. Especially with an anxiety thing like that. I'm so sorry for you. Fingers crossed your Doppler turns out just fine and you have a wonderful ultrasound.
Edit: this is done at highly regarded women's and children's hospital where most high risk women go.

SuperFudge00 · November 2014

I think it is a difference between facilities. When we were trying to rule out ectopic, DH had to wait outside. He has been at everyone since, including NT. What I don't like is that on my last scan, the screen was turned away from me until official measurements were taken but DH saw everything. Granted, he wouldn't know what to look at medically, but I pay attention and research the measurements. This is probably why she wouldn't let me see it.

topaz7777 · November 2014

I'm in the US and I know that HIPAA laws can sometimes be followed to extremes like that. They consider me the patient and not DH. You might try to inquire if you can fill out some paperwork that gives consent to them asking/releasing baby related information to DH and possibly that may be the key to allow him in? I don't know if that will make a difference, but I have had a doctor or two that went for that.

KayDeeKay81 · November 2014

shauna4608 said:

I also had my anatomy scan at McMaster last week. The tech told me it is because they do a very thorough exam and the tech's need to be able to focus on getting the pictures and info they need, the less people in the room the less distraction and interruption. They are very strict on this policy, unfortunately it's not something you will be able to change. I assume to that it is to keep the appointments moving in a timely manner.. McMaster does a very thorough scan, the tech I had told me an average hospital does 3 heart pictures and they do 10. It's a high demand hospital but definitely the best care.

Yes they do the best care and I wouldn't want to switch to anywhere else. Its also why I wasn't as firm the first time around about wanting my SO with me. I didn't want them to turn me away for being difficult - which just made it worse because then I cried the whole time.

I guess we will see. Maybe I should start my deep breathing exercises now to prepare for the worst.

emilyssymonds · November 2014

Policy is the same here in small town, Nova Scotia. My fiancé was not allowed in to my dating ultrasound at all and he will not be allowed in to the 20 week ultrasound until the measurements are done. I can definitely understand why this is so upsetting to you and I hope a compromise can be made.

be888 · November 2014

I had my first child in the US, and my husband wasn't allowed in the room at the beginning of the exam, when the tech was checking my anatomy. Once we started checking the baby's anatomy he was called in the room. I now live in Canada, and my husband and son were present at my A/S from beginning to end. I would ask for a special permission for your DH to be present. Can't hurt to ask.

Flowerstar1023 · November 2014

Sorry you're dealing with this! I like the idea of getting a doppler check ahead of time. After having a loss found on ultrasound, I've had my husband be at my side for every appointment and every ultrasound (fourth one scheduled next week). Hang in there sweetie! It saddens me that they have this policy and won't make exceptions. Pregnancy and especially PGAL is stressful enough.

mli85maj · November 2014

No advice, just wanted to say I hope they allow him in! I've never heard of such a policy.

anbeck327 · November 2014

My fiancé comes to every appt. especially since we lost our first at 33 weeks due to the umbilical cord having a knot (docs explained its a fluke thing & unpreventable). I get ultrasounds every month and can hear the heart beat daily if I want.
I'm seeing high risk doc and I'll be askin how many people can come in at one time for ultrasound.
Sorry you have to go thru this. It's understandable to have anxiety--especially after loss. I wouldn't take no for an answer. It's your baby. Your body. Fight for your husband to be in there

HoneyBunn24 · November 2014

c+est+la+vie said:

I am in Canada and my husband and MIL were called in afterwards to see the baby and heartbeat, as per policy. The same is expected for my A/S ultrasound. I didn't ask why. Can't hurt to ask.

For any of my ultrasounds with my DD I went into the ultrasound alone for all of the measurements and such and then they go out and get my DH. It's their policy and anywhere I went the policy was the same. They also don't show you the screen until after they are done with the technical stuff. They also don't talk to you for almost the whole hour...so it's quiet, and dimly lit, and super awkward...

julievdm12 · November 2014

@KayDeeKay81‌ I think this must be canadian policy and it definitely sucks. Long-ish story but I live in Burlington and hubby and I were told that we had less than 1% chance of naturally conceiving by our fertility specialist and we ended up pregnant anyway on our own. (So amazing!)
Needless to say I've been anxious about this pregnancy the entire time. Went for my first ultrasound and was pretty much shaking I was so worried and then the tech told me hubby couldn't come in till later and I was almost in tears. And then of course they stand there with the screen pointed away from you and just "do their thing" without any expression on their face and finally I just told her I was scared stiff and she sympathized a bit and assured me that from everything she was seeing things were normal.
Really hoping you get a compassionate tech and maybe a "rule bending" tech who will let you have someone with you. It's definitely super stressful.
Hope all goes well! Keep us posted.

OliveMom3 · November 2014

I'm near Montreal and I've had up to two people in the room with me for my ultrasounds and I have never been alone with the tech. If you could explain that your so won't ask questions and is there simply to provide support they will hopefully bend the rules for you. Hugs!!!

KayDeeKay81 · November 2014

doribeth851 said:

I just skimmed this thread, so I may have missed it, but have you asked why DH isn't allowed in the room with you? That policy is horseshit. I'm sorry.

I haven't asked yet, but I will be asking my Midwife tomorrow and then when I go for the U/S, if I get resistance I will ask why that policy is in place. I'm not so good at confrontation so I am really hopeful that my midwife will be able to help me out. I'm also bringing my mom, she is excellent in these situations

erikaluna01 · November 2014

The facility in the city I went to has this policy (I'm in CA) but I think I could have gone elsewhere if I wanted my husband in the room the whole time. I think they said it's simply because the techs don't want to be bothered with questions and therefore distract them from their job. It's silly because I asked plenty of questions for the both of us which were all answered by 'I'm not a physician. You have talk to your doctor'.

Go somewhere else if this is important to you. I don't think they'll bend the rules for any reason.

kurban627 · November 2014

I have gone to many different places and my family has always been allowed in. Sorry about this trouble!

c+est+la+vie · November 2014

Great news with your update! Best of luck with your ultrasound!

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Update - Re: Ultrasound policies question for those in the medical profession

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