Blanket training

dovetail223 · November 2014

So I just learned of this practice over on the parenting board. The general consensus there is this is bad/controversial. But after reading the definition, I'm not sure why. I could prob post this over on parenting, but I don't want to start anything.

Anyone else heard of this? Just from reading the description it doesn't really sound so terrible. Am I missing something?

I'll post the definition below according to Google.

dovetail223 · November 2014

Blanket training is an approach used to train toddlers and pre-schoolers to attain self-discipline. Proponents believe that with consistent training, the child will acquire an ability to play contentedly and quietly by her/himself for an extended period of time.

A parent designates a certain amount of time (usually 15–45 minutes, depending on the age of the child) that a child must sit by him/herself on a blanket on the floor. The child is not permitted to leave the perimeter of the blanket, and may play quietly with a toy while seated on the blanket. The desired outcome is that after daily training in this manner, eventually the child will sit and play quietly on the blanket whenever and wherever the child is asked to do so, provided that they are not asked to overstay their normal time on the blanket.

carawasa · November 2014

I guess it all depends on the age that parents start doing this. Under 1 I would say is controversial as babies need to explore to learn, so you are sort of isolating them and hindering their ambition to explore.

dovetail223 · November 2014

Totally agree @carawasa‌. I'm assuming ppl do this with an older toddler. The only way I would get DD to sit still on a blanket right now is with force.

deedee1017 · November 2014

No. Nope. No. Isn't that something a child will learn with age? Also, it sort of reminds me of a puppy being trained to use weewee pads. My kid is a kid and I'll allow her to be one.

carawasa · November 2014

That's the thing, I guess I don't see the problem for an older kid because it is good to show patience and for them to stay still a bit but honestly I think most ppl start too young and that's why it's controversial

1littlebird · November 2014

What life skill is this teaching? Unless I am at a picnic I have never needed to stay quietly on a blanket for extended periods of time. IMO I want my DD to explore and play and learn, yes that means I am on the go every minute, but she is LEARNING!

emmylou78 · November 2014

I've never heard of this. For toddlers? That's crazy.

What's the punishment for going off the blanket?

This borders on the idea that kids should "be seen and not heard" to me. My kid gets practice with sitting still and behaving in public, at places like church or a restaurant. Home is play time though.

jennlin · November 2014

@cousinvicki has very strong opinions on this topic.

ballygirl · November 2014

While this doesn't seem any more harmful than, say, sticking a kid in a pack n play with a toy for a certain amount of time, I don't see how this would teach them self-discipline, especially at this age. I think self discipline comes slowly in time - deft not at this age - and it is learned interactively (ie - learning how to wait your turn while playing a game or how to share, how to control your emotions) but these are things that require guidance from an adult, not just being left alone.

ballygirl · November 2014

Also - and maybe I am missing something, but playing quietly by themselves seems like a totally different skill than self discipline. My kids play quietly and independently for pretty long stretches when they find something that interests them. I think this is true of most kids - and adults. If you find something that is interesting, you can focus on it much more easily and longer than something that is boring for you. But they have zero self discipline at this point. They throw temper tantrums at the smallest thing and are very impatient. I could probably put Lizzy on a blanket with her favorite book and she'd stay there for 10 minutes or more very happily but that doesn't mean she has a lot of self-discipline. She just likes that book.

mancila60 · November 2014

DS can play "quietly" by himself already so why does he have to sit on a blanket to do it? I mean he stays in the living room or right around his toys but I don't get the blanket thing. With age he will learn to sit still but he's 1 and is going to move if his toys move.

PixiesDust · November 2014

I dont understand what the point of this might be? I can understand wanting your child to learn to play by themselves but confining them to a blanket (or similar small area) seems ridiculous.

megs1409 · November 2014

This option isn't for me. Agree with PP that kids will learn self-discipline in time.

Also, @dovetail223 - I laugh that you're choosing to come here and discuss this topic because you "didn't want to start anything" on Parenting. Controversial topics are controversial topics....as I'm sure you are WELL aware.

sleepy33 · November 2014

megs1409 said:

This option isn't for me. Agree with PP that kids will learn self-discipline in time.

Also, @dovetail223 - I laugh that you're choosing to come here and discuss this topic because you "didn't want to start anything" on Parenting. Controversial topics are controversial topics....as I'm sure you are WELL aware.

aka didn't want to get her ass handed to her by the Parenting gals

sleepy33 · November 2014

I'm not 100% sure, and IDGAF enough to look it up, but I'm pretty sure this is what the Duggar mom does/did with her babies so she didn't have to run around after all of them. I think she has said she swatted their hand with a ruler if they got off the blanket. ::seems legit::

emmylou78 · November 2014

ballygirl said:
While this doesn't seem any more harmful than, say, sticking a kid in a pack n play with a toy for a certain amount of time, I don't see how this would teach them self-discipline, especially at this age. I think self discipline comes slowly in time - deft not at this age - and it is learned interactively (ie - learning how to wait your turn while playing a game or how to share, how to control your emotions) but these are things that require guidance from an adult, not just being left alone.

Agree, that I don't think it's any more harmful than being in a PNP. My kid is in her pnp for 30 min or so, playing alone, while I take a shower and start to get ready for work. But if she cries, I pick her up if I'm able. I'm not trying to teach her anything. And I'm definitely not like clock-watching and telling her she still has another 15 minutes, etc.

KerCo51 · November 2014

I don't think it's the same as a putting the kid in a PNP because you need to get stuff done, which is just necessary sometimes. I think this could potentially harm a child's self esteem. I am all about my child learn things her own way and encourage her to explore.

deedee1017 · November 2014

KerCo51 said:

I don't think it's the same as a putting the kid in a PNP because you need to get stuff done, which is just necessary sometimes. I think this could potentially harm a child's self esteem. I am all about my child learn things her own way and encourage her to explore.

I agree. The purpose of a PNP is to keep them to a confined space to keep them out of harm's way. I guess if we're going to throw PNP in there we can include the gates that keep them confined to one room and the baby jails that keep them confined to an area. One option is to keep them safe and the other is to teach discipline.

However, I do agree with everything else @ballygirl said.

dovetail223 · November 2014

sleepy33 said:

megs1409 said:

This option isn't for me. Agree with PP that kids will learn self-discipline in time.

Also, @dovetail223 - I laugh that you're choosing to come here and discuss this topic because you "didn't want to start anything" on Parenting. Controversial topics are controversial topics....as I'm sure you are WELL aware.

aka didn't want to get her ass handed to her by the Parenting gals

I wasn't saying I agree with it...just asking what ppl thought. AND you all have been complaining its boring around here so....

sleepy33 · November 2014

dovetail223 said:

sleepy33 said:

megs1409 said:

This option isn't for me. Agree with PP that kids will learn self-discipline in time.

Also, @dovetail223 - I laugh that you're choosing to come here and discuss this topic because you "didn't want to start anything" on Parenting. Controversial topics are controversial topics....as I'm sure you are WELL aware.

aka didn't want to get her ass handed to her by the Parenting gals

I wasn't saying I agree with it...just asking what ppl thought. AND you all have been complaining its boring around here so....

I don't really care, I applaud any effort to keep things interesting. I'm just saying...let's not pretend about the reason you didn't say anything there, it's because you knew they would jump all over you.

dovetail223 · November 2014

sleepy33 said:

dovetail223 said:

sleepy33 said:

megs1409 said:

This option isn't for me. Agree with PP that kids will learn self-discipline in time.

Also, @dovetail223 - I laugh that you're choosing to come here and discuss this topic because you "didn't want to start anything" on Parenting. Controversial topics are controversial topics....as I'm sure you are WELL aware.

aka didn't want to get her ass handed to her by the Parenting gals

I wasn't saying I agree with it...just asking what ppl thought. AND you all have been complaining its boring around here so....

I don't really care, I applaud any effort to keep things interesting. I'm just saying...let's not pretend about the reason you didn't say anything there, it's because you knew they would jump all over you.

That's actually not true at all. I got the impression from their Dugger thread that it has already been discussed and ppl had strong feelings.

Edit for grammer

PinkDahLia44 · November 2014

The reason parenting hates it is because the punishment for straying from the blanket is physical. And I believe they start very young, like as soon as they can crawl young.

ballygirl · November 2014

crunchymama11 said:

PinkDahLia44 said:

The reason parenting hates it is because the punishment for straying from the blanket is physical. And I believe they start very young, like as soon as they can crawl young.

Yes- the punishment for leaving the blanket is hitting the kid's hands with a ruler and they start it at 6 months.

Regardless of the physical punishment part or not, a young child learns by exploring the world and moving, touching, tasting, seeing, hearing, smelling what they see. That is a normal aspect of infant and toddler development. My 3 yo can sit still and do something at the table because that is a normal developmental stage for a 3yo. It is not something that needs to be "taught", esp at such a young age.

And there is a difference between putting babies in the PNP so you can get stuff done and then responding to them when they cry and let them out when they are done vs making them sit on a blanket (or even a PNP) for a set time period until they "learn" something.

I don't even understand how blanket training by any definition sounds reasonable. It goes against every instinct and developmental stages an infant and toddler have. Like- just no.

whaaaa? hitting a 6 month old's (or anyone's) hand with ruler? that's nuts! I've seriously never heard of any of this before. Is this popular? Who does this?

KerCo51 · November 2014

I'm not an advocate of hitting any child, but a 6 month old is insane. WTF is wrong with people?

dovetail223 · November 2014

crunchymama11 said:

PinkDahLia44 said:

The reason parenting hates it is because the punishment for straying from the blanket is physical. And I believe they start very young, like as soon as they can crawl young.

Yes- the punishment for leaving the blanket is hitting the kid's hands with a ruler and they start it at 6 months.

Regardless of the physical punishment part or not, a young child learns by exploring the world and moving, touching, tasting, seeing, hearing, smelling what they see. That is a normal aspect of infant and toddler development. My 3 yo can sit still and do something at the table because that is a normal developmental stage for a 3yo. It is not something that needs to be "taught", esp at such a young age.

And there is a difference between putting babies in the PNP so you can get stuff done and then responding to them when they cry and let them out when they are done vs making them sit on a blanket (or even a PNP) for a set time period until they "learn" something.

I don't even understand how blanket training by any definition sounds reasonable. It goes against every instinct and developmental stages an infant and toddler have. Like- just no.

You should update the Wikipedia definition. Yikes!

acethebase · November 2014

Wow! @-) Our babies aren't animals that can be "trained," they're babies. Or maybe yes, they can be trained but definitely shouldn't be. When people come up with this sort of shit it makes me think one of two things 1) they don't have children OR 2) IF they have children, they shouldn't have had any.

Fucking people

Amjoy25 · November 2014

Um no. My baby is not a dog. Contrary to many of her actions. Andplusalso, I don't even do this to my dogs.

catycate · November 2014

Blanket training is big in the super fundamentalist crowds- religions that tend to teach submission and control. It's not teaching self discipline or independence- it's teaching that if you don't stay in line, someone bigger then you will hit you.

AggieAsh23 · November 2014

It sort of seems like time-out to me. I mean other than giving them a toy it's the same thing really... "Sit here, don't move from this spot, don't bother me until I come get you." It's definitely not for us.

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