Grandparent gifts to baby or other kids

aetg · November 2014

Anybody else read this article by Dave Ramsay about Grandparents giving gifts to their grandkids? What do you think?

I know that the past couple years I almost felt like I shouldn't even bother getting gifts for my son on Christmas because he gets so much stuff from everyone else. But then again, we don't buy very many toys throughout the year other than birthday or Christmas so I'd like these holidays to be special.

chickyclg · November 2014

I am going to show my parents this article. They are the over do it type for Christmas, so the thought of them buying a simple toy and putting money in a special fund would be great.

janedean77 · November 2014

We always buy the grandkids an outfit and a small toy or book. Next year is going to be so weird with the grandkids and the baby.

t8keepr03 · November 2014

My parents set up a college fund for our DD when she was born. They will always get her one present for Christmas and for her birthday for her to open. They will then deposit money into her account for the holidays and her birthday. They will be doing this for this baby too. It's awesome because when DD gets money from other relatives for a variety of things I write my mom a check and she will deposit that much more into her account. If DD pulls out the money for college related things she won't have to pay tax on it. But if she uses it for something else she will have tax to pay. Her account has an excellent interest rate so it is growing pretty well for only being a year old. I wish my in laws would give DD money that I can put into the account instead of all the toys and clothes. They don't really ask me what she needs so on a few occasions we have to return or exchange. I wish they would at least ask what some necessities are.

aetg · November 2014

@thedish0207 oh yeah I couldn't show this to my family either, they wouldn't go with it at all....sigh.

firelizard83 · November 2014

This addresses issues beyond just gift giving, but also just having a basic respect for the parents (their kid's) wishes. This is something I dread dealing with in regards to my in laws

psychobutthead · November 2014

I love this. I really have the issue of my husbands family over buying at birthdays and christmas. They buy so much stuff just to buy it that my daughter never plays with any of it.

But I know if I show'd them this it wouldn't make a difference and they'd do whatever they want still.

Mrs. Zee · November 2014

My grandparents gave us Christmas ornaments every year (one for each of our Christmas's-so 1for 1st Christmas, 2for 2nd Christmas, etc until we were 20 I believe) so we would have a set of ornaments when we grew up and something small as well as a savings bond. I used the savings bonds for my down payment on a new car after college. I love the idea of giving future instead of more clothes and toys.

kefttsc · November 2014

My MIL just told us at lunch that she had to stop buying for the babies for Christmas (even though they LORD WILLING won't be here) because she felt bad about how much she had for them to go under the tree.

My parents struggle with things to get them and would rather give them money for education.

This is PERFECT timing for me and I passed it on to all of them! Thanks!

lizzybean · November 2014

MIL has a major shopping problem. And she buys Ella the "cute" things instead of practical things. This kid had like, 4 ball gowns in a NB size. I dressed her in them, she hated it, I took a quick picture, then they went back in the closet never to be worn again.

DH has actually started mentioning putting money aside for Ella's school instead of blowing hundreds on unnecessary clothes.. We'll see how well she listened come Christmas time

AnotherSun · November 2014

I don't like most toys anyways. My kids only have "thinking" toys. Blocks, playdoh, dress up and dolls. It was so difficult to get grandparents to comply that we said zero toys several years ago. They can get the kids books that don't make noise or memories. My parents get us aquarium memberships every year, they do zoo trips or cupcake making days. His parents won't comply and we just donate whatever they give.

aetg · November 2014

@jthomp1219 I get what you are saying and I definitely agree they can spend it however they want, but sometimes it is frustrating when you know that your gift is always going to be overshadowed by the grandparents. This year we had to at least mention a few things they weren't allowed to get so we didn't get duplicates and I could be assured of at least some excitement.

wintersong139 · November 2014

aetg said:

@thedish0207 oh yeah I couldn't show this to my family either, they wouldn't go with it at all....sigh.

Yep

chicagojackie · November 2014

I'm in the UO camp too. DD is the only grandchild on both sides and very loved. We tried hard for her and my pregnancy was high risk and then I had a post partum hemorrhage that almost killed me. My parents are gone but H's family is big. So there's always lots of gifts. We do a present from us and one from Santa and then go to grandma's and it is what it is.

DD knows the rules are different at grandmas. I'm not going to worry about if their gifts are "better" than mine or how much money they spent. Last year, we donated several gifts to the children's hospital from both her Christmas and October birthday because we just couldn't get to them all. I only put out a few things for her at a time anyway.

I'm not telling anyone what to get or what not to get unless I am asked. I always felt that was in poor taste anyway. I think that spoiling your kid has more to do with not having clear boundaries and discipline the other 364 days of the year.

Besides, how awesome is Christmas when you're little?

This is not my mountain to die on with my ILs!! Now if they are feeding her something crazy or not safe (popcorn, etc) I jump right in there-and they know that-so they usually ask.

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