Triggers: Grays anatomy, news stories making me sad/anxious

BackstreetPixie · November 2014

Okay. I wanna start with I saw the doctor today, (20 weeks 4 days woo) and all is well. Found hb with doppler (first time the doppler has worked) and baby was moving a lot so that is all wonderful. I go back in one month and have to do the glucose test at that time.

Warning *spoiler* for last and this weeks grays anatomy if you have not seen it.

Warning *Losses and sad and scary things mentioned*

Still here? okay..

What I wanna talk about here is... triggers. Things that have been making me cry uncontrollably and be so sad about my previous loss and worry for this baby. 1. Grays Anatomy. The TV show. Anyone else watch it? First last week a woman died on the table with an emergency c-section. This week they learned one of the characters who is pregnant has problems with their baby and their baby could never survive more than a few weeks. I know these people are not real but It scared me and has made me so very upset.

2. News. EVERYONE on facebook is posting this story about a man singing to his newborn baby boy after the mother died during the birth for some reason, then the baby dies later. I mean EVERYONE I KNOW has posted this and it just makes me so so sad and scared of dying during labor. I know I know... that doesn't happen that often but I'm just kinda freaked out. Then a news story about a woman living in Colorado (i live in Colorado) dying of some rare disease during labor. .... what the heck y'all I do not need to be hearing this crud and I don't even watch the news this is all coming on in my FB feed. ugggghhhh.

Add to it I'm kinda freaked out that my blood pressure has been super high the past 2 times I went to the OB but was totally normal at the regular doc last week. (I went in thinking I had a sinus infection.) Like twice at the OB my top number has been around 140 (bottom number 80) Which is definitely NOT normal for me. I'm usually around 118 or 120. She said theres nothing to worry about but... well yeah I didn't listen. I'm worried about that. which IS NOT GOOD FOR THE BLOOD PRESSURE! lol I took my BP at home (I have my own cuff) and it was 124/80... (several hours later.) So maybe the doc BP machine is messed up or something. Every time I take it anywhere else it is normal.

Just... I guess I just wanted to go somewhere to vent these frustrations/sadness/anxieties where others might understand. ... After typing this up I actually feel a lot better. (maybe hormones are getting to me some too?) I dunno. TV and FB stop being sad now, k?

littlecookie · November 2014

Huge hugs.

I watched Grey's last night and an annoyed about that storyline. Its like can't anyone have a healthy pregnancy on that show. I have seen the link about the dad, but couldn't bring myself to watch the video. So I guess my coping strategy is avoidance when I know it's coming. I like pp idea of seeking out positive stories to counterbalance. I've heard of some people who stake out the bmb of the current month and get warm fuzzier from the announcements.

KikiCohen · November 2014

Many hugs! I don't watch Grey's, but I know the news stories you're talking about. The one you mentioned about the woman who had to choose whether to save herself or her baby really, really got to me. I was in tears for a long time after reading it. Obviously I hope I'm never faced with that decision, but honestly I don't know what I'd do. Would I willingly risk the baby's life or leave my children without a mother? It literally makes me sick to think about

akleng · November 2014

I was a hot mess during Grey's last week and then I saw the previews for last nights episode and was like "Seriously!?" Haven't watched it yet, but I'm hoping with the spoilers it will maybe make it a littler easier to watch since I'll prepared for the sad news.

Unknown · November 2014

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beemaya83 · November 2014

Sucks how anything related to baby not coming home is out there for us with little or no warning. As a matter of fact I was just browsing through my Instagram and saw a pic of a newborn baby who didn't make it home. The mom posted a pic with a long explanation Of how she felt etc.....I'm sure this was her way of letting it out/grieve but I was totally caught off guard. Many hugs to you lady. I'm glad your baby is dancing around!

[Deleted User] · November 2014

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Ziegeficker · November 2014

I understand how you feel -- When I was pregnant, the episode of Private Practice aired where Amelia's baby had no brain. It was terrifying...and even though these are anomalies (shows like these wouldn't survive without inexplicably dramatic twists and turns), PgAL ladies are especially sensitive to these fears. Big hugs!!

PS -- I absolutely refuse to watch that video of the father singing to his dying baby. Nopenopenopenopenopenope, can't handle it...

KJsbabe · November 2014

I watched Grey's last night and it was super sad. *spoiler* I'm glad they didn't tell the parents yet because I think I would have cried my eyes out at that point.

I've seen the FB stories, but I haven't read or watched them. I'm another one for avoidance. I know what I can handle and what I can't, and I can't handle stories like that. When I've read them in the past I get consumed thinking about them and imagining what it must have been like, ect. There were a couple stories that took me a long time to get over, so I don't even go near them now.

asglover514 · November 2014

First off *hugs*! I haven't watched this season of Grey's. I think I missed last season too but I can totally see the triggers. I also know what video you're talking about and try to just avoid it. I'd find a cute puppy video or something to bring back the happy.

Bostonchelle · November 2014

Re: the blood pressure issue it sounds like you may have "white coat syndrome" as relates to your OB/OB visits. There are lots of people who will have elevated BP bc they are so anxious at the doctors office. During my last pregnancy my doctors office stopped taking my BP before the check up because it was always elevated. Once I heard babies heartbeat and knew everything was ok my BP was fine before I left the office. I doubt their machine is broken but to check you could always ask them to do it manually.

BackstreetPixie · November 2014

@snowbigdeal‌ Yeah I do like that they are talking about these things when it is normally so hush hush but at the same time there has just been too much all at once lately. Mixed feelings about it all.

chicagojackie · November 2014

I just want to say that on Grey's anatomy they put their stethoscopes on backwards, don't wear gloves properly and say a lot of ridiculous shit that doctors would never, ever say.

Don't let them upset you. STETHOSCOPES. BACKWARDS!!

Hugs!!

KMW08 · November 2014

I want to add that these feelings came in spurts for me. A lot of it IMO stems from being 'AL, but I would have days where I was beyond worried about everything pg related & other days where I was genuinely excited for baby's arrival.

I'm not sure how active you are on your bmb, but as peeps started having term/close to term babies regularly, my anxiety about something going wrong became worse. Being AL always had that voice telling me this wasn't really going to happen. It's a real sneaky, vicious bitch.

TravelingCouple · November 2014

I know what you mean, I saw that video posted all over fb but haven't brought myself to watch it. I've been avoiding negative things because it's a trigger for me too. I may skip Greys this week too then, hadn't watched that yet. Just watch what you can handle and avoid/turn off what you can't. PgAL brain sucks

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Triggers: Grays anatomy, news stories making me sad/anxious

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