~ Loss Check-In ~

CherryPicked · November 2014

Hi ladies, I hope you have been kind to yourselves this week.

Welcome to the check-in! I am sorry to have to welcome new loss moms this week but am so glad that you have found us. I hope we can bring each other some much needed comfort and support. Please feel free to join in when you are ready and share as much or as little as you wish. Also, if you have any questions you would like answered, just ask! Any lurkers out there please don't be shy, we would like to be able to support you too.

Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week?

What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal?

QOTW: A thorn, a bud, and a rose: What is something that is bothering you (thorn)? What in your life is giving you hope? What are you looking forward to (bud)? What is something that makes you happy or you are thankful for (rose)?

CherryPicked · November 2014

Have you taken any new steps towards healing this week?

I survived the anniversary of Caroline's diagnosis and went to training to be a parent resource for families facing the same diagnosis. It has been a difficult week, but one with forward motion.

What is the next goal you have set for yourself? Do you have a plan to help achieve that goal?

I have been slacking with my diet lately and need to get back on track. No more Halloween candy and junk food!

QOTW: A thorn, a bud, and a rose: What is something that is bothering you (thorn)? What in your life is giving you hope? What are you looking forward to (bud)? What is something that makes you happy or you are thankful for (rose)?

Thorn: My family didn't check in on me as we passed the days that turned our life upside down last year. I know that it's unreasonable for them to remember those dates, but it made me feel alone.

Bud: I am looking forward to supporting parents on this journey - it is something that I can do for Caroline, even though it will be difficult.

Rose: Lots of things have been going well for DH and I am so happy for him. After all that we've been through, he deserves some happy.

shandorfml2 · November 2014

**siggy warning**

hi ladies, sorry I've been MIA.

I've had a lot going on. Last Thursday, my Mom called and said my Grandfather had died. This was sad, but expected as he was 87 and had heart issues. So, I went down to my parents house 3 hours away. My Mom has pancreatic cancer, and is unable to travel so since I am KU, I decided to stay with her and the rest of my family went out of state.

The next day, my Mom was looking horrible (swollen legs, fatigue, hallucinations) so I forced her to the doctor and they admitted her to the hospital. We found out she had a large blood clot in her leg, was anemic, dehydrated and her magnesium and potassium were low. She also had a low red blood count. She was there for a week and I helped her in and out of bed, held her hand as they drew blood from her dry veins and she cried. I also took care of the house and our three animals. It was extremely taxing on me. Mom improved at the hospital. I helped set up in home nursing. It's hard to "mother your mother" but I needed to be tough with her to get services as she was a bit resistant. However myself and my Dad/sister cannot meet her needs alone. So, she was discharged after a week and is doing better. We had a scare the night she discharged because she started bleeding, and since she is on blood thinners, we rushed to the ER. Thankfully the bleeding stopped and we could go home.

My Dad and sister are back from my grandfather's funeral, and I'm back home. I'm exhausted, overwhelmed, and very sad about my Mom. She is terminal, but is undergoing chemo to prolong her life. So, just a lot of tears this week and hard conversations. I'm so tired, but wanted to pop back in as this board has been a major support for me in the past.

Love you ladies, thanks for reading!

msunshine123 · November 2014

@kderoy - I am so sorry your family did not remember the day you and your DH received the news of Caroline's diagnosis and you felt alone. Hugs to you. You are so amazing - offering to be a resource to parents and you will be an incredible resource having literally been there yourself.
@flutteryfly88 - I'm glad you felt some peace after Paker's funeral. I can relate to your feelings - after my son's death any little thing that seemed to go wrong seemed to hurt even more - be patient with yourself. Good luck too as you get ready to return to work.
@shandorfml2 - I am so sorry for the loss of your Grandfather and all that your mother is currently going through. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers - sending you so many hugs.

stefuge · November 2014

@kderoy‌ - I am so sorry that your family didn't acknowledge your difficult week last week. My ILs forgot Colton's first birthday, and it really crushed me. It's hard to let stuff like that go. I'm glad you got through those difficult days and are working on being a resource and support for other families. Amazing!

@flutterfly88‌ - I'm glad Parker's funeral brought you some peace. Don't rush back to work if you don't feel ready. I took 9 weeks off after losing Colton, and I know I needed that time. Some ladies are even able to go back part time at first, or to work from home for a little while, so maybe those might be an option for you as well? ((Hugs)) it's hard to go back to "normal" and be expected just to pick everything back up and keep going.

@shandorfml2‌ - you and your family have been heavy on my mind and heart lately. While I'm glad to see an update on you, I'm so sorry to hear about your grandfather and about the difficult week you had with your mom. Hoping that things with your mom get better, and you have as much time with her as possible. ((Hugs)).

shandorfml2 · November 2014

thanks ladies

CherryPicked · November 2014

@flutterfly88 - How has going back to work gone? I found it so hard when I first went back ((hugs))

@shandorfml2 - I'm so sorry for everything that you and your family are going through right now. I think of you often and am praying for you! ((hugs))

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