Should I feel bad?

Re: Should I feel bad?

• dufferoo member

  November 2014

  I don't think you should feel bad. If it's working for you, it's working for you. But I do think it might help your PPD a bit if you had enough of a schedule that you knew you's get some "you time" in there at certain times during the day. Frankly, your routine sounds a little boring to me, which could get depressing after awhile, but I still wouldn't necessarily feel guilty about it or anything. Here's a fact: It's a pain in the ass to get out of the house and do anything with a toddler. But for me, it's worth it to force myself to put forth the effort, because my son and I are both in better moods long-term when we don't spend too much time in the house. Do what you do. There are million ways to parent a kid.

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• brachysira member

  November 2014

  If it works...  A routine works for us because my daughter knows what to expect.  If we do something weird, like start naptime an hour later, it takes her forever to go to sleep, and that's no fun.  If your child sleeps well, is well-rested, seems to be developing well, and isn't a pain to deal with, your plan seems fine.  If she acts out or can't act like other kids her age in public, etc. then you may need to give her more to do, expose her to more, etc.

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• Everyusernameistaken member

  November 2014

  Getting out of the house will be good for kiddo but also for you ppd. I have mild depression and anxiety and getting out everyday is what keeps me from sinking. We do play dates, drop ins, even trips to Costco (he freaking loves it there). Meeting other moms has also been integral to my mental health
  Good luck!!

  
  

   

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• kwalk1 member

  November 2014

  These are all wonderful ideas...but money is tight right now with DH being the only one working. Everything for us is literally an hour away...especially with the bridge on our state road being out and having to take the long way around. Our SUV takes a lot to fill with gas so driving everyday or even 3-4 times a week isn't an option. Also she doesn't just lay around watching tv. She watches videos sometimes to fall asleep and other times she falls asleep on her own. I am on medicine for my PPD now. We are bored and that's why I feel bad but we just can't do much right now

  
  

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• LSU628 member

  November 2014

  Get outside as much as possible. The exercise will be good for your depression, it releases the same chemicals as your medicine and is a natural mood booster. You can work on doing like a scavenger hunt, let's look for something blue, something smooth, putting words to the things you see. Besides, what kid doesn't love to run around outside?
  If outside isn't your thing, what about incorporating an arts and crafts or cooking project each day? My DS like to "help" in the kitchen- he pushes the button on the coffee grinder, we count as I scoop in the beans, he pushes the button on the coffee maker once I get everything prepped. He helps feed the dog and the fish. The busier I keep him, the less likely he is to whine or get bored and clingy.
  

  
  
  
  

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• LSU628 member

  November 2014

  Also, what about reading books? DS loves the lift a flap/peek a boo style books. We also play a lot with the stackable buckets and cups. He thoroughly enjoys knocking over the towers after DD and I build them for him. Once again, we are counting, talking about the colors of the buckets or blocks. He also really enjoys playing with his sister's baby dolls and doll house and kitchen set.
  

  
  
  
  

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• Crequito member

  November 2014

  I suggest going outside as much as weather permits - DD loves to be outdoors and explore (so just walking through the grass picking up leaves).  You could point out colors or objects and have LO repeat the words if she's talking.  Does LO color?  That's one of DDs favorite things also - sometimes just a pen or pencil and one sheet of paper is enough to keep her happy and occupied for 30 minutes.

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• kwalk1 member

  November 2014

  Closest library is 30 minutes away...The park is about 10 minutes and we do go there sometimes. She occupies herself very well with toys. She can play up to an hour by herself if she wants to. I also play with her and read books. I just look at all these pinterest ideas and wonder if I should be doing them all the time. Sigh...wish I was craftier lol!

  
  

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• erinmc1 member

  November 2014

  Be active, even if it's just in the house.  If you're depressed, being active can only help (I've struggled with depression as well, and know how hard but necessary it is to get moving).  I hold my son by the hands, and squat down to his level, then jump up with him like he's a kettlebell.  He loves that it feels like he's "jumping" so high, and it's amazing exercise for me.  We chase each other from room to room playing hide and seek, and then for quiet play, we sit and read or do shape sorting/counting/color toys together.  He currently likes being pushed in a laundry basket.  We pretend it's a roller coaster, rolling it side to side and back and forth, too. We rarely do structured activities, and I rarely feel even a little bit bad about it.  

  
  

  It's really easy to blame the lack of transportation if you're bored, but there are always fun things to do if you can find the motivation.  If you feel badly enough to ask about it, and you are still feeling like you can't get motivated, you might want to have another discussion with your doc about your medication.  Plus, and I don't want to be a busybody here, but if you tend towards depression, your daughter may be susceptible as well, and encouraging an active lifestyle while she's young is important to help combat that.  

  
  

  I second PP suggestion of playdates or trying to find other moms in your area.  It honestly sounds mostly like you're lonely and uninspired.  I think it will get easier as your little girl gets older and more interactive.

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