Parenting Check-In (11/10)

Jazibel · November 2014

Good Morning Everyone!

How was your weekend? Any new successes, challenges or milestones to report? Welcome & Congrats to @Pauljl on the arrival of Callie (I took the liberty of adding you, let me know if you'd like anything changed).

QOTD: Does your LO(s) have a "wubby" (comfort object)?

QOTD #2: With Thanksgiving around the corner what are your plans this year?

Parenting Roster:

(Please let me know if you would like to be added)

@2brides – G & C born 5/18/06, other Mom is L

@Themommymonster – C (DS) born 2/18/09

@Mystjava – Little Bear (LB) born 3/31/10, other Mummum is Shawn

@winstan1 – J (DS) born 9/10 (currently 3.5 years old)

@Trisholio and @trisholiosboi – Proud foster parents to M born 2/6/12 and K born 8/22/13; baby Adalyn born 8/29/14

@jazibel – Kaden born 7/13/12 and Owen born 5/2/14, other parent (Aya) is EV

@newmompeanut – N (DD) born 2/12/13, other Momma is B

@CageyMack – W born 3/16/13

@JGY – Gabe born 3/24/13, other Mama is S.

@Stringy813 – M born May 2013

@Clairmeij – Alarico born 6/28/13, other mama is V

@Wallace323 – J and L born 8/8/13, surviving triplets born at 31 weeks

@Jrtmom – Henry born 8/15/13, other mama is L

@ATXmommas – Sebastian (“Ash”) born 11/21/13, other Momma is Z

@mwagner25 – Oliver born 11/27/13, other parent is L

@herbabymama‌ – C (DD) born 12/10/13, other Mama is K

@Sarahtrpt – C born February 2014

@AmandaG47 – Twin girls born 2/22/14, other Mommy is J

@Mamosey‌ & @Karlamo‌ – R born 2/25/14

@shameless370087‌ - Anthony and Sati, born 3/9/2014, Other mom is S

@Filmfanatic82 – Charley born 3/15/14

@2momsinCA‌ - B & O born 5/27/14

@KH826 – Will born 6/4/14

@redrockmama – M born 6/19/14, other Mama is J

@ball.and.chain – B born 6/28/14

@Flygirl1228 – Twins 7/25/14

@KLeigh1‌ - S born 7/25/14

@shelly2314 - Elise and Olivia, born 8/19/14, wife is M

@2MamazInSeattle‌ - S born 8/21/14

@rkbo‌ - Amelia born 9/22/14

@pauljl - Callie born 11/5/14

2brides · November 2014

We wrapped up fall sports this weekend (YIPPEE!) Gray wanted to play soccer again this winter and Carter was waffling about basketball and soccer. He's been saying he was going to play basketball, but was not committal about it and when he did the family soccer game recently, he was into it and really played (kid has no hustle...he is so related to me.

) I needed to register them and so we were having this conversation:

Me: I really need to know if you want to play basketball this winter. I have to register you. I wanted sure if you were really interested in playing (he talks more about what he is going to wear than playing!)
Him: I dunno....
Me: Well, the other thing is that the practice and games aren't until 6:20 on Sunday nights. So you won't be getting home till 8 or little after that....
Him: So no reading in bed when I get home?
Me: No. It will be your bed time...or after. You will need to shower and get ready for bed as soon as we get home.
Him: No reading in bed? No. I don't think I'll play.

LOL.

QOTD: Not really. C has a build-a-bear that he sleeps with, but he isn't crazy attached to it. L and I made bears for them before they were born. A few years ago, C dug it out and bought a Ravens outfit for it and named it Ravie. So, it hasn't been a long treasured item, but he does like to have it in bed when he goes to sleep. G doesn't.

QOTD: ILs are coming in town and we are all going to NYC for the parade and see the holiday decorations. Should be an adventure.

ball.and.chain · November 2014

B is 4m.

B has a cold. I have his cold. This is not surprising since he regularly sneezes and coughs directly into my face. Moms of older kids -- when can you teach these rugrats to blow their noses and cover their noses/mouths when they sneeze? (I know it's not for a long time. Just, you know, something to look forward to). Anyway, the cold's not terrible. I'm just mainlining Zicam and trying not to wear myself down. And hoping I didn't give it to @2MamazinSeattle, @mamosey, @karlamo or their families!

Otherwise, not a ton to report, parenting-wise. S and I are having a hard time coming to an agreement on how much time to spend with my family on Christmas. She wants Christmas morning to be just the three of us, and I know my dad and sisters (who don't have kids) will be super disappointed. Do others have this problem?

QOTD#1: Ha ha, his "wubby" is...his "wubby!" That's what we call the WubbaNub pacifiers, which he's been using since the first week of his life. He has a frog and a duck and I think my sister got him a new one for Christmas. We have three "lovies" that we received as gifts, but I haven't been able to interest him in them yet. I'd like to get him attached to one that isn't a pacifier so it won't be as big a deal once we go pacifier-free.

QOTD#2: Our plans are essentially the same every year: we celebrate with my family, because they are local (my wife usually works the day before and the day after Thanksgiving, so traveling to her family out of state isn't practical). This year S's dad and stepmom are coming up to join my family, and it will be out first year with my sister's bf added to the mix.

Jazibel · November 2014

@2brides - haha Gray has his priorities straight (well at least in my book), I'd have picked the same thing ;-)

Kaden - 2 years (27 months), Owen - 6 months

We had a very busy weekend, and I feel like I have a lot of catching up to do on the Bump (I couldn't post from mobile this weekend for some reason). I was excited to see a re-intro from @herbabymama - I've been thinking about you and baby C :-) Glad all is going well.

Friday I took the kids to preschool, Kaden had his usual great time. I had a work call at 2pm and both boys were thankfully asleep during it. One of the most stressful parts of working from home is trying to have professional conversations with a toddler pulling on my leg and a baby babbling in the background. I do everything I can to avoid that when I can. A meetup group just formed in my area for a WFH babysitting coop. Our first get together is on Wednesday morning. I am soooo thrilled to find other local WFH parents that might be willing to do a regular exchange during the week.

Friday night friends came over and we had spaghetti and hung out with the kids.

Saturday we stayed home all day. EV did homework and I hung out with the kiddos. I did many loads of laundry (and got all but the cloth dipes put away!) and then raked part of the yard.

Sunday we went to brunch at our in-laws. They were definitely stressed out. S is 39 weeks pregnant and I think the imminent arrival of their LO just has them both in knots. My brother-in-law was being a bit of a dick. (I'd described it as a 10 year old boy trying not to cry and instead acting out obnoxiously). It wasn't that enjoyable of a visit, but I was appreciative to be able to be there for them, and be compassionate toward what they were going through. Saturday afternoon we went to our favorite restaurant in San Rafael (Sol Food). It's Puerto Rican food and their restaurant always has a line out the door and down the street. We took our lunch to go and ate at a nearby park. Kaden played for a bit and then we went to our friends house for an informal business meeting (E is my catering business partner) and to hang out. Kaden loves their son L and they had a blast playing. Kaden fell asleep as soon as we started back home.

So since DLS the boys have been sleeping so poorly. One night they were up nearly 15 times between the two of them. It's been nightmarish. EV said to me the other day that I was a little grumpy last week and I laughed 3 hours of sleep non-consecutively is just not okay. Anyway the last couple of nights have been better. FX that it stays this way.

Kaden understands more and more of what we say, and EV and I realized we really need to change how we talk about all things. We've just woken up to the fact that now we have a full blown child (not a baby) living with us, and all our worldviews, comments, etc. will influence him. Yikes!! Anyway that's another conversation in itself. Owen is sitting completely on his own and playing with the activity center, or pulling toys out of the basket. He and Kaden truly play more and more everyday. It makes me grateful to have had them so close together - despite the challenges associated with that reality. Owen's also crawling forward a few steps at a time, and still crawling/scooting around backward and to the side.

QOTD: Kaden has stuffed green alligator that we call Buddy. He sleeps with him. Owen has his turtle wubanub (pacifier). But he like Kaden couldn't really be bothered with a pacifier though we introduced it right away this time around. We'll probably get him a stuffed animal when he's closer to 12 months to sleep with too.

QOTD #2: I'm actually not sure what we're doing on the day itself. My cousin and her daughter will be in town (I think my cousins husband is flying back home). So they'll visit. Our friends from LA will also coming up to the Bay Area. I'm looking to seeing their two girls together with our kiddos. And I'm curious to see if baby H (who is 5 month old) has any similarities to K & O because of their shared donor.

*edited to add ages

KH826 · November 2014

Will is 5 months old!

This weekend was good. Lots of usual stuff... grocery store, Target, out for lunch... some bath time, some family floor time, a couple good naps on Mama in the glider

Yesterday we went to the Walk to End Alzheimer's -- it is a 5k, but the slowest 5k EVER. HAHA... so I don't think it really counts as exercise. My company sponsors a team every year, and it was fun to be able to bring Will and join the hundreds of people with strollers at the event. Will did great - he napped in the fresh air for most of it!

Here's a run down of the latest stuff in William world:

* His new 9 month jammies fit him perfectly. Not at all too big. My child is a giant. I told my mom to get him 12 month stuff for Christmas. Ahhhh!!!!

* Still loving bath time, still sleeping like a pro, still smiling and laughing like crazy.... still the coolest little human I have ever known!

* He is now a professional roller. The kid refuses to stay on his tummy for more than a hot second before rolling. He did stay on his tummy for about a minute and a half over the weekend and for the first time ever got all the way up on his hands and knees (crawling position), but then plopped himself right back down and promptly rolled to his back 30 seconds later. I feel like he is starting to figure out how to be mobile... thorough baby-proofing is imminent!

* He is sitting for longer periods unassisted and loving it. He now pulls himself into a semi-sitting position from laying down. He has down it in his swing and his lounger (like the RNP). If he is awake, he wants to be a part of the action and wants to be up and looking around. I told J over the weekend that it looked like he was about to jump right out of the swing. Honestly, I feel like very soon containing him is going to be an issue...

* We have given him the tiniest little taste of greek yogurt twice now and he loved it. We plan to start BLW on his 6 month bday (Dec 4th!), but on two occasions we put a tiny bit of yogurt on our fingers when we were eating it and let him lick it off, and he was seemingly in heaven. he now stares at us when we are eating and follows the spoon/fork from plate to mouth with his eyes. It is hysterical. I am pretty sure he can't wait for real food!

Questions for the group this week:

* How long after your LOs cut their first teeth did you start legit brushing them? Right now Will has two teeth and we have just been wiping them with a warm washcloth. When do we transition to a toothbrush?

* Talk to me about strollers. I have mentioned before that I hate our stroller. I am weighing the options about getting something new for just him, or just putting up with our current stroller for now and then splurging on an awesome double stroller when we have baby#2. At any rate... tell me about what you love and/or hate about your strollers, please and thank you!

* How old were your LOs when you transitioned them from the infant car seat to the convertible car seat?

* Do any of you have one of these: https://www.gracobaby.com/products/pages/productdetails.aspx?productid=1757431#sthash.SjkmYFB0.dpbs -- tell me if you like it?

QOTW#1 - Will has a few favorite toys, but he does not really have a comfort object. He decided at about 6 weeks that he had no interest in the binkie anymore. He is really good at self-soothing, and he sucks his thumb or his fingers to get himself to sleep a lot. I would say his own hand is his comfort object at the moment LOL

QOTW#2: We are heading up to my mom's house in Suburban Boston for Thanksgiving. Will's first big car trip! I am nervous. We are headed up the Tuesday of Thanksgiving week to give us all a day to recoup before Thanksgiving. My mom is hosting about 15 people for Thanksgiving dinner, and it might be a tad overwhelming since none of the Aunts, Uncles and cousins have met Will yet. I am tired just thinking about it. I am looking forward to it, though. then on Friday (day after Thanksgiving) we are headed with my Mom and sisters to visit my brother and introduce him to Will. THAT is going to be a super emotional day. Saturday we will head home, and Sunday we will put up our tree and decorate our house for Christmas!

Karlamo · November 2014

Good Morning! R is 8 1/2 months.

First, let me say we had fun at the BGTG! We look forward to doing it again and hopefully more can join in!

As of Thursday R officaly says da da da da da.....Non-stop. It's so cute. As an Interpreter, I love seeing language develpoment happening and this is a great milestone to hear. He has no association with the "word" da da but we're having fun trying to make one by referring to our cat Billy as da da. We'll see if it sticks:P

His seperation anxiety has improved a lot. He still favors me during the day, but we have fewer and fewer crying fits when I leave his sight.

This is most likely my last week of breast feeding him. It is bittersweet. For the past 8 months I've been lucky enought to feed him and now that I can't pop a boob in his mouth when he's fussy, I'm going to need to get some new material. Last week righty was giving me next to nothing when I pumped and then on Friday she rallied from behind and gave me over an 1oz. Lefty is going strong and hasn't gotten the message yet that we're weaning. I've stopped all supplements and am feeding and pumping some. I expect my period on Friday and will start the estrace that day.

QOTW: No comfort objects here other than his mommies. Seriously, we never intended to practice attachment parenting but R did.

QOTW#2: This year Thanksgiving is with my family. With mamosey's family in the midwest we switch off holidays every other year. R will probably get his first taste of meat at Thanksgiving too!

Jazibel · November 2014

@ball.and.chain - I hope you and B feel better soon. I'm working on trying to teach Kaden to blow his nose now). He mostly just purses his lips and makes raspberry sounds. he can wipe his face/nose with a tissue and throw it in the garbage or toilet so that's something.

Maybe other's have had earlier successes?

@KH826 - I think we gave Kaden one of those rubber toothbrushes around 6-7 months (shortly after his teeth came in). He'd hold it and chew on the bristles. I used the finger brush on ocassion once he was regularly eating solids. But we didn't start him with a toothbrush until he was at least a year (last September/October) I think. I only put a tiny bit of toothpaste on it because he doesn't have the spitting part down yet. Owen has no teeth even remotely close to the surface so we'll see when his pop through.

I love the City Mini as a single stroller. It's light and folds completely flat. I also loved that it had a wide umbrella cover. I could get a ton of shade for K in the summer, or give him privacy to sleep. We now have the City Select double stroller (in black and silver). This is a great stroller, easy to maneuver for a double stroller, gets pretty compact and works well as a single stroller too. Negatives: its heavy. I was using EV's sedan last week and really struggled to get it in and out of the trunk. I wouldn't necessarily pick our colors again. I thought they looked super modern, but the matte black scratches easily, and the silver seats are already super dirty and stained (the stroller is only 6 months old). I can wash the seats and need to do so soon. But still a darker color would have perhaps been more practical.... Positives again: there are lots of configurations (16 - I think) which I love. We didn't buy the bassinet or car seat because the regular seat lays flat for that newborn stage and Owen loved it. The basket underneath is huge - with two kiddos I use all that space regularly. I'm 5'3" and EV's 5'10" and the adjustable handle is great for both of us. I also like the long and narrow vs. the side by side which seems like it would be hard to navigate in crowds or stores.

Good luck with your choice!

Karlamo · November 2014

@jazibel, 15 wake ups :-O You poor thing. I hope that was a fluke!

@2brides, when the time comes, I'll need to know the secret to picking reading over sports

2brides · November 2014

Karlamo said:
@2brides, when the time comes, I'll need to know the secret to picking reading over sports

LOL. I don't know! I have no idea if these things contributed, but they were read to all.of.the.time starting at birth. We had a nanny who loved children's books and loved to read and read lots and lots of books every day. She (and we) took them to the local library every few days for new books (the librarians know them by name!) We read to them every naptime and bedtime - and once they could read on their own, they read in bed before going to sleep. We let them choose what they want to read. Comic book? Graphic novel? Sports book? Sure. Carter even picked up The Hunger Games this fall. LOL. We never made books a punishment "You will have to go to your bed and read if you don't do XYZ." And they see L and I reading a lot.

Who knows if any of those things helped.

But we love that they love to read!

KH826 · November 2014

@ball.and.chain - I hope you and B both feel better soon!

@jazibel - I was thinking about the finger brush... but I wasn't sure if he was too little. I mean, most kids don't get teeth at 3 months, so I feel like we need to buffer the usual age range. I just don't want to be neglectful since he has these two big boy teeth and I worry that we aren't properly cleaning them! In terms of strollers... I have been looking at double strollers (b/c I am a nut case), and I like the side-by-side, but J likes the long and narrow configuration that you described. Hmmm....

@String813 - those BOB strollers look like they are no joke. I do worry about how heavy they are though... not sure it will be practical. There are literally SO many choices.

Also, we already have a convertible car seat that we got as a shower gift. This is what we have: https://www.chiccousa.com/gear/car-seats/nextfit-gemini.aspx ... I think we will try that and hopefully use it for a while. Hopefully it is a good fit for him. It is purple. It is the one non-gender neutral piece of gear that we got when we thought we were having a girl. Hope Will likes purple! :-p

2brides · November 2014

We had a side by side (a Baby Jogger model that is no longer made) and loved. It was heavy, but worth it (we had a lightweight Peg Perego that we hated - so hard to push.) We never really had issues having a side by side vs a inline stroller.

What about this https://www.babyjogger.com/product/city-select/ - you can add another seat to it when you need to.

Karlamo · November 2014

2brides said:

Karlamo said:
@2brides, when the time comes, I'll need to know the secret to picking reading over sports

LOL. I don't know! I have no idea if these things contributed, but they were read to all.of.the.time starting at birth. We had a nanny who loved children's books and loved to read and read lots and lots of books every day. She (and we) took them to the local library every few days for new books (the librarians know them by name!) We read to them every naptime and bedtime - and once they could read on their own, they read in bed before going to sleep. We let them choose what they want to read. Comic book? Graphic novel? Sports book? Sure. Carter even picked up The Hunger Games this fall. LOL. We never made books a punishment "You will have to go to your bed and read if you don't do XYZ." And they see L and I reading a lot.

Who knows if any of those things helped. But we love that they love to read!

We named our son Rudy, so I fear we may have an uphill battle on our hands

2brides · November 2014

My son is dying to see that movie.

He ADORES football and reads all about it - learns the stats, etc.

ATXmommas · November 2014

Ash is less than two weeks away from his first birthday!

We had a big weekend… in that we bought Ash his first pair of "real" shoes and he had his first haircut! We bought his shoes at Stride Rite. I had no idea there are so many rules involved in buying shoes for kid! We bought a pair of the "Stage 2" shoes for kids that are just beginning to walk. The salesperson said that it will take about a week for him to get used to walking in them and 2, maybe 3 months, before he needs to move up a size. He doesn't seem to mind wearing the shoes, but he hasn't perfected walking in them yet - looks a bit like he is trying to walk with clown shoes on. Super cute!

We had some time to spare on Saturday between things, so we decided to go ahead and get his haircut. I knew I wanted his haircut before his birthday party. The mini-mullet needed to go! He did so well! He moved his head a bit, but he sat perfectly still in the chair. I think he was just so mesmerized by the environment since he's never been inside a salon before - lots of new things to check out. I love his haircut - she only cut the back and around his ears. Looking more and more like a little boy and less like a baby every day.

We took him in the running stroller while we ran on Saturday and Sunday and he did really well. He really enjoys our runs - thank goodness! We ended up meeting our friend and her daughter (who is two days older than Ash) at the playground on Sunday. We pushed the kids in the swings and let them wander around a bit. At one point, my friend was giving her daughter some food out of a pouch and Ash insisted on having some. He walked right over and opened his mouth. Manners, dude!

#-o

He's not been sleeping well lately and I have no idea why. He's been pretty fussy at bedtime and usually wakes up once before midnight - Z takes that shift - and once between 3:30-4:00. I think I might night wean him in a few weeks and see if that helps…

QOTW #1: He doesn't have a comfort object. We've tried at different times to offer one, but he hasn't taken to anything. He sometimes still takes his wubanub during naps/nighttime, but he doesn't need it to go to sleep - at least not when I put him to sleep.

QOTW #2: We never travel for Thanksgiving since we usually travel for Christmas. Last year my mom was still in town at Thanksgiving because it was just a week after Ash was born. Looks like she and my stepdad will be around for Thanksgiving this year too! They are coming for Ash's birthday party on the 22nd, then traveling to see some of my mom's family and will return to Austin on Thanksgiving evening. We will cook Thanksgiving dinner on Friday or Saturday. I'm excited they will be here.

ATXmommas · November 2014

@ball.and.chain - in regards to time with family. I'm with your wife. I feel pretty strongly about spending Christmas day in our own home with just our little family. We'll wait to travel to Mississippi to visit my family until at least the day after Christmas. My family doesn't get hurt, though. I think they respect that we want to spend Christmas in our own home.

@KH826 -

* How long after your LOs cut their first teeth did you start legit brushing them? Right now Will has two teeth and we have just been wiping them with a warm washcloth. When do we transition to a toothbrush? We started off using a soft washcloth and we still go back and forth between a soft bristle brush and washcloth. We're still using Xpry, which is a xylitol paste, at the recommendation of our pediatrician and a dentist friend. We haven't taken Ash to a legit dentist appointment yet, but plan to do so soon. My dentist friend said it is okay to literally just brush for a couple of seconds. He convinced me not to worry so much about how well I was cleaning them at this stage.

* Talk to me about strollers. You're not crazy. I picked out the Britax B-Ready when I was pregnant because I wanted a stroller that would convert to a double stroller. It sounds a lot like the one @jazibel described. It has multiple configurations, including ones with an infant/toddler seat combo and two toddler seats. It will definitely grow with our family. What I don't like - it is heavy! We also have a BOB Ironman, which is lighter weight than our Britax, but we only use it for running.

* How old were your LOs when you transitioned them from the infant car seat to the convertible car seat? We probably didn't transition until 8 or 9 months? I can't remember exactly, but Ash is smaller than your Will, so I can definitely see you transitioning sooner. And, actually, we still use the infant seat in one of our cars, but will be switching it out with another convertible seat that my mom just bought us.

KH826 · November 2014

I am also nervous about the transition from the RNP...we have the Graco Lounger, but it is essentially the same thing as the RNP. Will has been sleeping in it since birth in our room, and it has been awesome for all of us. I am terrified to ruin a good thing by moving him, but he is literally too big for the lounger now. I mean, it says it can go up to 30 lbs, but seriously show me the 30 lb kid sleeping in that thing?!?! Will was 17 lbs at his 4 month visit, and now at a little over 5 months I would not be surprised if he is 18ish lbs. He was also 26 inches long, and based on the length of pants, I think he has gotten longer too. Anyway... we need a solution for the lounger SOON, but we really, really, really are having a hard time considering moving him to his own room. We don't feel emotionally ready (please don't judge - we just like him with us, and he is so content in there)... I also feel like his nursery is drafty in the winter, and I know he will be nice and toasty in with us. We originally said we would transition him to the crib and his own room by 6 months, but now we both don't feel ready to move him in 3 weeks. We also are terrified that he will freak out, and we really don't want to mess with our rock star sleeper...

With all of that being said, that is why I asked about this bad boy: https://www.gracobaby.com/products/pages/productdetails.aspx?productid=1757431#sthash.SjkmYFB0.dpbs

We are considering getting one of those and keeping him in our room a while longer...

Thoughts?

Karlamo · November 2014

@sarahtrpt, I DO!!

I work part-time, 3 days/week. R is in daycare 2 days/week. I love it and feel R and I have the best of both worlds. He gets to interact with other kids and do things I would never think of doing with him and I get to continue my career that I love.

How we work it is Mon/Tues he's in daycare and then the rest of the week he is home. He's home with me Wed and Thurs and my wife works from home on Fridays with a mother's helper. Another great thing with me working part-time is that we're not financially strapped like if I was a full time SAHM. We get to still do lots of fun things like travel and continue our amazon addiction.

Karlamo · November 2014

sarahtrpt said:

@Karlamo -- thanks! I have an Amazon addiction as well! And I actually think I might buy less things if I was working That's awesome you have a day care option that will take him only two days. I've just heard a lot of facilities around here will make you pay for full time even if you only need part-time. But I need to actually ask around more.

2 days/week was the min, that they would accept. I asked for 1 day $:\$ ">

We live in the Boston area where daycare is insanely expensive. We pay about $520/month for a center. Ask around you may be surprised. We also did an in home daycare 2 days/week before we moved which was much cheaper.

Karlamo · November 2014

@KH826, have you thought of side caring (sp?) your crib? That would save money and get him used to his crib at the same time.

BTW, R sleeps with us.... no judging from this mama:)

Amber&Reva · November 2014

@Karlamo did you use a daycare facility with multiple locations. R and I will likely need to put the little one in daycare just 2 days a week also and I am 1)glad to hear you found somewhere in the Boston area that offers this and 2) am glad it is less then what I was thinking it would be.

ATXmommas · November 2014

I think you know when you and your baby are ready for the room/crib transition. Ash slept with us (in our bed) for 7 months. Then one night out of the blue we felt ready to put him in his crib. Wasn't a plan - just a spur of the moment decision. He slept really well and we never looked back.

ball.and.chain · November 2014

@KH826‌, as PP said, I have also heard it is best to transition them from bassinet/RNP/bed to crib before 6m. B sleeps in our bed and our pedi said she has no problem with it BUT if we don't want him there forever (we don't) we should transition him now. I too am nervous about the transition.

@Amber&Reva, our daycare also does part-time. B is in a home daycare 4d/wk but I know there are other kids who are there 1, 2, or 3 days. It seems like home daycare are more willing than centers to do this. We are less than 10 m from Boston and pay $9/hr.

KH826 · November 2014

I totally hear what you all are saying about it being harder to transition out of your room after 6 months... Logically I totally get that. However the thought of transitioning him makes me feel like I'm going to have a full on panic attack. I just don't feel ready. Maybe I will feel more ready in a couple of weeks...

ball.and.chain · November 2014

ATXmommas said:

@ball.and.chain - in regards to time with family. I'm with your wife. I feel pretty strongly about spending Christmas day in our own home with just our little family. We'll wait to travel to Mississippi to visit my family until at least the day after Christmas. My family doesn't get hurt, though. I think they respect that we want to spend Christmas in our own home.

The problem is that they have never NOT spent Christmas with me (with the exception of the two years we were in California). And since they don't have kids/ILs to spend it with, I think it feels a little lonely to them not to spend it with us, especially with B here. We haven't really decided what we're doing yet, though I can see both sides.

Jazibel · November 2014

@ball.and.chain - rg. Christmas. Would you (and your wife) be willing to do an early morning Christmas presents/breakfast just the 3 of you, and have your family come for brunch and more present opening and photo ops with B?

@KH826 - I totally understand the nervousness to move Will from your room (especially since he's such a stellar sleeper). I liked @Karlamo's suggestion to have his crib in the room. We used a pack 'n play in Roatan (and on a few vacations) during Kaden's first year. I found them to be OK - not great. Ok because you have to bend low to place your LO down which can be hard to do in one "smooth" motion. Also the mattress pad usually folds open so the creases don't line up perfectly and seem like they would be uncomfortable to sleep on over long periods of time. We ended putting Kaden's crib mattress in his pack 'n play and once we did he slept much better. After that whenever we traveled I always add blankets or towels to soften the mattress and even out the creases. I might just be creating a "princess and the pea" monster and its nothing any kid would even care about - who knows!!

KH826 · November 2014

OK, this is the last thing I will say about the crib situation, because I fear you are all getting tired of me talking about it...

But to address @Jazibel's questions/comments... we cannot fit the whole crib in our room. Nor would we want to. It is massive and would have to be taken apart to get it through the doorways. The whole reason we were considering the "mini pack n play" is that it is mini. Our room is small. Our house is 200 yrs old. Right now we have our queen sized bed, two dressers, two night tables, a recliner in the corner where we feed him before bed, and his lounger. That is really all that can fit in there reasonably.

The more I think about this, the more I think maybe I am not being reasonable. I think I need to talk to my wife again about it. The thing is, she doesn't want to move him either. She was relieved when I said "let's find a way to keep him in here beyond 6 months" ... now if I take it back, she might be upset. I don't know... we need to talk it through. Preferably not when we are both exhausted. I thought about bringing it up last night, but that seemed like a bad idea because we were both totally spent, I had a headache, and it seemed like a recipe for disaster to bring up a possibly controversial parenting discussion....

When we figure it out, I will let you all know where we have landed. Thanks for indulging my need to talk through this... I didn't think I would be the type of parent that panicked at the thought of my child being in the next room, but.... surprise!

ATXmommas · November 2014

ball.and.chain said:

ATXmommas said:

@ball.and.chain - in regards to time with family. I'm with your wife. I feel pretty strongly about spending Christmas day in our own home with just our little family. We'll wait to travel to Mississippi to visit my family until at least the day after Christmas. My family doesn't get hurt, though. I think they respect that we want to spend Christmas in our own home.

The problem is that they have never NOT spent Christmas with me (with the exception of the two years we were in California). And since they don't have kids/ILs to spend it with, I think it feels a little lonely to them not to spend it with us, especially with B here. We haven't really decided what we're doing yet, though I can see both sides.

I'm sorry if I came across as if I was telling you what I thought you should do. What I meant to say is that I understand where your wife is coming from. Our Christmas' growing up were always spent in my own home with just my parents and siblings, so I have this idea in my head for how I want to spend Christmas with my own family. We don't have any family nearby, so it's not such a struggle for us to decide, nor is it something that Z and I disagree about. I think @jazibel has a great point about spending part of your day as just your family of three and the rest of the day with your family. I think that is how my brother and SIL do it with their kids since they live near the grandparents. No that it matters so much now that B will only be 5 months at Christmas this year, but I think you just need to think about what type of traditions and experience you want him to have at Christmas and go from there. I'm sure it will work out fine!

ATXmommas · November 2014

KH826 said:

OK, this is the last thing I will say about the crib situation, because I fear you are all getting tired of me talking about it...
But to address @Jazibel's questions/comments... we cannot fit the whole crib in our room. Nor would we want to. It is massive and would have to be taken apart to get it through the doorways. The whole reason we were considering the "mini pack n play" is that it is mini. Our room is small. Our house is 200 yrs old. Right now we have our queen sized bed, two dressers, two night tables, a recliner in the corner where we feed him before bed, and his lounger. That is really all that can fit in there reasonably.
The more I think about this, the more I think maybe I am not being reasonable. I think I need to talk to my wife again about it. The thing is, she doesn't want to move him either. She was relieved when I said "let's find a way to keep him in here beyond 6 months" ... now if I take it back, she might be upset. I don't know... we need to talk it through. Preferably not when we are both exhausted. I thought about bringing it up last night, but that seemed like a bad idea because we were both totally spent, I had a headache, and it seemed like a recipe for disaster to bring up a possibly controversial parenting discussion....
When we figure it out, I will let you all know where we have landed. Thanks for indulging my need to talk through this... I didn't think I would be the type of parent that panicked at the thought of my child being in the next room, but.... surprise!

I just checked out the Graco link from your original post. If you're not ready to move him out of your room and don't have room for something larger, I don't see why you shouldn't give this a shot. If it doesn't work, then you can sell it on Craigslist or save it for #2. Another thing - you may not use it that long - you may be ready to move him to his own room within another couple months (or maybe not and that's ok too!), but it would be a $100 well spent to give you peace of mind until you are ready.

And, FWIW, I think this whole idea that you have to move your baby out of your room by 6 months or they are doomed is a bit of a crock. Every kid and family is different, so just do what works for you as a family. Let us know how it goes!

KH826 · November 2014

@ATXmommas - THANK YOU! You just made me feel so much better! That was exactly what I needed to hear!

I don't know why I am feeling like such a puddle of emotions over this issue. Honestly, parenting William has been a joy, and for the most part it really hasn't been stressful. The idea of moving him "just because I'm supposed to" when my heart tells me it isn't time yet for us makes me want to ugly cry. Sometimes we can't explain why our gut tells us something, but my gut is just telling me to keep him with us a while longer. If transitioning him to his own room turns out to be a nightmare because we waited "too long" it will be our own doing and everyone can shout in unison "I told you so!"

Also, my wife posted about this graco contraption on a parenting board no FB that she is a member of to see if anyone had anything good/bad to say about it. Well, turns out one of our IRL friends who is also a member of that parenting board saw the post and said that she has one that her son has outgrown and we are welcome to borrow it to "test it out" for a few months. She said she just wants it back before baby #2 (she's not even pregnant yet - so that's a ways off!). So I figure, we could borrow hers to try, and if we like it, we can buy our own. Agree that it would be $100 well spent if it gives us all piece of mind.

2momsinCA · November 2014

@KH826‌ I have to jump in and support the britax b ready. We bought it on a whim super early on when I was pregnant the first time with a singleton which I sadly lost soon after. We were pleasantly surprised we bought it when I was later expecting the twins. It works so well as a double. We love all the configurations that it can do. But it really is very heavy. We also have a side by side city mini gt double for when they are a bit older and I have a feeling that will be our primary stroller when they are both sitting up. Side by side is just better to me for two. It's easier to see both babies, less like steering a bus.

Karlamo · November 2014

@Amber&Reva, we use a small business that only has one center. We called around to the big names out there; Kindercare, Bright Horizons but they wanted to charge $1,000 for 2 days/week!!!! I would suggest calling around sooner rather than later. Based on our experience it was hard to find a place that had the same 2 days open that fit with my work schedule.

redrockmama · November 2014

I'm a day late again. M is 4 1/2 months old.

Our weekend was really busy. We got the wood to make our dining room table, I'm really excited to get going on it. My dad said we should have it done by Christmas, no problem, which would be awesome. We attempted a re-do of his photo shoot and he just would not smile, we got some cute shots but no cheesy grins. Sunday evening we went to our friends' house to watch the soccer game. Their baby was still too little to be excited about M. She just screams whenever she sees him, and he gets excited, until she screams and then he starts screaming too. I hope they like each other when they get bigger

M is amazing and adorable. He is doing new things with his voice everyday and almost rolled from his back to his tummy over the weekend. I'm 99% sure he can do it, he just doesn't want to yet. He did a 180 on while laying on his blanket playing, but no rolling yet. He does this throaty growly purring noise all the time. It cracks me up. He mostly does it when he is really happy and/or nursing. He gets all smiley and talks in his little purring voice, such a funny baby. He is so much happier now, it makes me forget how hard those first 2-3 months were. His reflux is a lot better and he's just a happy little guy these days.

Sleep is still a struggle. He will sleep in the crib portion of the bed for 1-2 hours, but that's it. Then it's like a switch goes off and he has to be right next to me, every surface of his body touching mine. Last night he woke up and freaked out and latched on and was asleep in 2 seconds. If I don't let him latch back on he wakes up all the way and starts crying. It's just a phase right? My wife makes little remarks about how much he nurses and needs me and it's really starting to upset me. I should talk to her about it, but I don't have the energy and don't want to fight.

QOTW 1: He has a monkey we've named Mr. Snuggles. I think he could take or leave Mr. Snuggles but he gets really happy when he is around and takes naps with him with the nanny. I want him to have something to comfort him because I think it's cute and I never had anything like that. My niece has a blanket that I got for her before she was born that turned into her "wubby". She named it yellow and it went everywhere! Once she left him (she assigned it a him) in Idaho and we couldn't find a replacement online. Luckily her dad was able to get it back. It was and is so cute and special, yellow was like her first "friend". We have a blanket my mom made M we are hoping he latches onto, or he has a million others he might decide to love, we'll see.

QOTW 2: Well, we finally made a decision about Thanksgiving. We are going to one of the ski resorts and going to have a fabulous feast up there. We probably won't stay the night because of the dogs, but it should be nice. J and I usually end up doing most of the cooking and we just don't want to do it this year and we also don't want to deal with the family drama. My mom is coming with us, not sure about my sister and her family though. I'm a little sad it won't be our traditional Thanksgiving and I will miss cooking, I just couldn't see how we'd do it with M still being so little and unpredictable.

redrockmama · November 2014

@2brides, so cute, I hope M loves reading that much! I hope he loves sports too

@jazibel, so cool that you shared a donor with your friends. I'm really curious about donor "siblings" and wonder how much they would look/act like M.

@KH826, sorry no crib advice here. We are doing the side carred crib and aren't having much luck getting M to sleep in it for long periods of time. I hope you find something that works for you. I can't imagine putting M in his own room yet either, nothing wrong with wanting your baby close

@Karlamo it's got to be hard to stop breastfeeding. I hope the transition goes well for you.

@ATXmommas wow first shoes and haircut. I can't believe his is so big! I imagine we'll get a PIP of his new do on Thursday?

ATXmommas · November 2014

redrockmama said:
@ATXmommas wow first shoes and haircut. I can't believe his is so big! I imagine we'll get a PIP of his new do on Thursday?

But, of course!

JGY · November 2014

Late here ...

@KH826

Teeth - G got his first teeth right around 9 months, and I took him to the dentist for the first time just shy of his 1st birthday. Somewhere in between those two milestones, I started "Brushing" with that little, rubber, finger brush thingy. About a month or so after the dentist appointment, we started using an actual kids' toothbrush. I only put on a tiny bit of toothpaste, and G swallows it. Some days there's more brushing and some days less, but mostly it's about the routine. He LOOOOOVES to rinse the brush and put it away. The brushing? Not so much.

Strollers - I wanted 1 stroller. We have a small house, and don't have room for lots of stuff. It needed to be durable. We ended up with 3 strollers. Sigh. The stroller that I wanted to have as our "One and only" is a Bob IronMan that I got on Craigslist. It's awesome, not too TOO heavy, folds up nicely, etc, but it's enormous. And there's no way in hell we could travel with it. So eventually we ended up getting a standard Chicco stroller (the one that our car seat clicked into), again on Craigslist. We had also registered for an umbrella stroller for when he was older, and we actually use that a lot now. I have NO idea what we'll do when/if it comes to #2.

All of the above to say, I'd advise that you spend a little more to get something that can handle multiple types of terrain, is the right size for you, can accomodate future kiddos, and meets your style requirements. You'll actually end up saving money.

Convertible Car Seat - G was a giant. I believe we transitioned around 10 months (but he was also walking by then and hated his bucket seat, so it actually made things easier). He liked the additional space of the convertible seat quite a bit.

Sleep Transition (or not) - One suggestion for when you do decide to transition Will to the crib ... I might be Captain Obvious here, but something that helped me a lot with the transition was having the video monitor right next to the bed. I was able to really see how he was doing whenever I wanted, without risking waking him by opening/closing doors, etc. G transitioned REALLY quickly. In fact, I think we might have been interrupting his sleep when he was in our room. But, moral of the story, do what your get is telling you. (Almost) Every child will face some sort of sleep challenge at some point. If he's doing well now, why mess with it?

JGY · November 2014

stringy813 said:

Annnnnd we ditched the bottles finally. I never thought it would happen but she initiated it, and I'm glad we didn't force it on her and make it a battle. She was clearly ready now. And her sleep has gotten SO MUCH BETTER since then. Usually just waking up once to join us in bed around midnight!

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

JGY · November 2014

2brides said:

My son is dying to see that movie. He ADORES football and reads all about it - learns the stats, etc.

Assuming I'm not forgetting something, I'd think this movie would be pretty appropriate for him at this age. It has some pretty good messages. I kinda can't wait to watch it with G now that I think about it.

JGY · November 2014

Karlamo said:

@sarahtrpt, I DO!!
I work part-time, 3 days/week. R is in daycare 2 days/week. I love it and feel R and I have the best of both worlds. He gets to interact with other kids and do things I would never think of doing with him and I get to continue my career that I love.
How we work it is Mon/Tues he's in daycare and then the rest of the week he is home. He's home with me Wed and Thurs and my wife works from home on Fridays with a mother's helper. Another great thing with me working part-time is that we're not financially strapped like if I was a full time SAHM. We get to still do lots of fun things like travel and continue our amazon addiction.

Not sure this helps since you're no where near us, but our daycare (small chain) offers part time spots and that seems to be pretty common out here in MN. You pay the same whether it's 2 or 3 days per week, but it's nice to see that option offered.

2brides · November 2014

JGY said:

2brides said:

My son is dying to see that movie. He ADORES football and reads all about it - learns the stats, etc.

Assuming I'm not forgetting something, I'd think this movie would be pretty appropriate for him at this age. It has some pretty good messages. I kinda can't wait to watch it with G now that I think about it.

It is! We just haven't gotten around to watching it.

I need to see if it is on Netflix. It isn't on Amazon.

JGY · November 2014

So I totally ambushed the TTC thread yesterday and now I'm doing the same to this one. Sorry guys, my time at work is waaaaay more limited than it used to be!

Gabe is 19 Months Old

G is doing great. Really starting to voice his opinions on lots of things. We typically have a couple of hilarious exchanges each day (mostly funny in retrospect, but every once in a while I can appreciate it in the moment). Last night he was able to tell me exactly what he wanted as his post-dinner snack, and this morning he rejected his typical breakfast for a whole apple, and don't I dare cut it up for him thank-you-very-much!

We've been suffering through some pretty terrible diahrrea lately though, and with that has come AWFUL diaper rash. It makes the diaper changes, which were already a challenge, virtually impossible for one person. Too bad I fly solo every morning, and for most of the evenings as well right now.

Sleep continues to be good. He wakes up about once a night, but only 1-2 times a week. The dog on the other hand, entirely different story. Ugh.

Other than G specific stuff, work is challenging for both of us right now. S has the schedule from hell. And she's going to have to travel a bit now as well, so I will not plan on seeing much of her this winter. As for me, I had to lay off 2 people from my team (of 6) this week on Monday. It was gutwrenching, and will continue to be so. We will be majorly challenged to get our work done, and the remaining team is angry and upset and I don't blame them one bit. I haven't slept well in over a month because of this, and the last few nights have left me drenched in sweat. Yuck. If it's not one thing, it's another, right?

Lastly, I'm on CD 1, so ... here we go? C'mon body, let's make this easy and get that BFP on the first try!!!!

QOTD 1: Once I stopped inadvertantly starving my child, he spit out the pacifier and never wanted it back. So no wubanub lovies in this house. He isn't too TOO attached to anything else, but his first animal words were Owl and Turtle, so S ran out and got him a little stuffed one of each of those and he asks for them regularly. But he'd be fine sleeping without them too. @herbabymama I read No Cry Sleep Solution as well and tried to encourage G to bond with a lovely as well, but it didn't really work for us.

QOTD 2: Thanksgiving truly is my favorite holiday! We trade T-Day and X-Mas with the two families each year, so this year T-Day is with my family and they are coming to us! This is awesome because my Dad, who's in his 80's, really hates to travel and also really hates to be cold. Oops, sorry Dad, I live in MN. Anyway, my parents and Sister will come here and unfortunately S will be traveling for work. But we'll have a great time cooking and listening to music and just generally being together. Can't wait!

ball.and.chain · November 2014

@ATXMommas, no worries, I did not think you were telling me what to do!

I can absolutely see that side of things, and I don't necessarily disagree with it, I just kind of feel bad saying no to my sisters and dad. Part of it is that my mom LOVED Christmas and so it has been kind of a bittersweet holiday for our family since she passed away. I have thought for a long time that having a kid or kids in the family might perk things up again, so having one and then denying my extended family the chance to experience Christmas morning with him makes me feel a bit guilty. Not necessarily rational but there it is.

My wife comes from a big family and many of her sibs are significantly older, so they were married with kids when she was in high school and often celebrated with their in-laws. So not only is she used to not celebrating with everyone, there was always someone else in the family to celebrate with. My family is much smaller, and each of my parents only has one sib who lives out of state. So we spent Christmas Eve AND Christmas morning AND Christmas afternoon/dinner with my paternal grandparents every year until their deaths. My sisters don't have kids or in-laws, and my dad doesn't have any other grandchildren, so I think it just feels natural to them for all of us to spend ALL of Christmas together, Christmas morning being the most important BECAUSE SANTA.

So can I see the appeal of the three of us celebrating together as a little family? Sure. And then I think of my sister eating oatmeal by herself in her condo and it makes me a little sad. She'll likely be married and having kids within a couple of years, so that will make it a little easier for everyone to do their own thing.

The past few years we have opened our presents to each other early on Christmas morning before my family arrived, and I think the best compromise at this point is to extend that time a little bit and have my family over for brunch. Can't really please everyone, but that is as close as we're going to come.

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