Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
vvvvvfee
member
Re: Extended BFing Check-in
2. How many times a day is your LO nursing? 4-6 (this may include some MOTN feeds)
3. Does your LO nurse to sleep? If not, what is their bedtime routine like?
I was going to say yes, but after reading @vvvvvfee 's response, no. She does nurse right before bed and she only nurses from my right boob. She lays across my lap to do that and then when she is done, she switches sides (so her feet aren't hanging off the bed) and falls to sleep after a few minutes of just laying on me. The process before all that is a bit of a problem as she hates having her teeth brushed, but after that's done and she nurses, she falls asleep pretty quickly. It did not used to be that way, so I'm thankful!
4. What is your LO's name for BFing? Boob. She also says "boob couch", because that's where I usually nurse her.
Non-breastfeeding question of the week:
What do you usually eat for breakfast on weekdays? 3 Eggo whole grain waffles with peanut butter and a banana
We nurse every night before bed, motn as needed. Weekends and other days we are together...lately, on demand and like a newborn. I was trying to wean back from the frequency but now she has a cold, and I feel bad and know that nursing helps her feel better.
Yes, she nurses to sleep for night and naps at home, though the one time I wasn't home, she went to bed just fine. She has her back patted on a cot at daycare for naps but naps only 1.5 hours there as opposed to 3 hours at home.
Noo noos is her name for nursing. She'll also climb on me, assume the cradle position and start pulling up my shirt or bring her boppy over and say "up peese".
It varies, usually yogurt and a banana or oatmeal or a muffin. Lately it's been a poptart and coffee...bad, I know.
1. How old is your LO? 31 mo. I had to think about that for a minute. These days I just say "he's two and a half".
2. How many times a day is your LO nursing? 1 or 2. We don't nurse after work anymore and sometimes he skips the morning nursing. On weekends sometimes he'll nurse after nap (we don't nurse to sleep for naps anymore). I think this is called natural weaning, it's been very slow and gradual.
3. Does your LO nurse to sleep? If not, what is their bedtime routine like? Yes he still nurses to sleep. He can go to bed with some snuggles if I'm not there.
4. What is your LO's name for BFing? "Nurse", we never really made up another name for it. He also calls my boobs "nurse" (e.g., if I'm changing my shirt he points and says "Mama, your nurse!").
Non-breastfeeding question of the week:
What do you usually eat for breakfast on weekdays? cereal or oatmeal and coffee.
1. Almost all night long and 4-5 times during the day
3. DD nurses to sleep and has developed her own nap/bed time ritual of books and songs to go with it. Her nap/bed time varies. But she can be relied on to go down or a nap four-ish hours after waking and go to bed six-ish hours after her nap.
4. She has just started calling breast milk "bibi bahtee" she also calls it "mama bahtee" or just "bibi". Cow's milk or any milk in her sippy is "bahtee".
5. I eat two eggs, sometimes in a cheese omlette and sometimes over medium, every morning. Some weeks we have beef bacon and I get to have that too. I always eat a lacto fermented Mexican carrot slaw with breakfast every morning. ETA: I forgot green tea and a ginger kombucha
4. What is your LO's name for BFing? "nan-nan," or lately, "mmm! nan nan." she came up with this name for it months ago. i think it's really cute.
2. How many times a day is your LO nursing? 4-6
3. Does your LO nurse to sleep? If not, what is their bedtime routine like? Yes
4. What is your LO's name for BFing? No word for it yet but I taught her the sign for "milk" so now she does the sign
Non-breastfeeding question of the week:
What do you usually eat for breakfast on weekdays? I'm bad....usually just coffee
13.5 months
2. How many times a day is your LO nursing?
5-6
3. Does your LO nurse to sleep? If not, what is their bedtime routine like?
Yes though she takes sippy 1xweek when I work late.
4. What is your LO's name for BFing?
She was saying Milk a few weeks ago and now points and says Bah or something like that. I keep trying to get her back to milk but wonder if she's aiming for something closer to boob!?
What do you usually eat for breakfast on weekdays? Does DDs leftovers count for my breakfast? If I do make something for myself she ends up eating it anyway! I usually go for ceral, oatmeal or wait til I get to work for yougurt and a banana if I'm rushed.
-My step-daughter is 12 years old.
-BFP #1 on 9/2/12, D&C 10/18/12 no heartbeat on US @ 10 weeks.
-BFP #2 on 1/7/13, R was born on 9/22/13 via C-Section
1. How old is your LO? 15 months!
2. How many times a day is your LO nursing? 6+
3. Does your LO nurse to sleep? If not, what is their bedtime routine like? We bedshare so he is still nursing to sleep plus a MOTN nursing session.
4. What is your LO's name for BFing? He signs for milk and sometimes says "mil"
Non-breastfeeding question of the week:
What do you usually eat for breakfast on weekdays? Oatmeal and strong coffee. Occasionally we'll treat ourselves to bacon and egg burritos from the place a block over. Yum!
2. How many times a day is your LO nursing? 2 - morning and before bed.
3. Does your LO nurse to sleep? If not, what is their bedtime routine like? She has a bath, gets into PJs and we brush teeth, then DH reads her a story. Then we nurse, and then we go around the room and she turns off the light and says goodnight to a few inanimate objects, then she has a drink of water, we turn on her noise machine, and she goes into her crib. She generally talks to her "baby" for a few mins and then passes out.
4. What is your LO's name for BFing? Nu-nu
Non-breastfeeding question of the week:
What do you usually eat for breakfast on weekdays? DD's leftovers + coffee? Hah. Cereal, generally.
2. How many times a day is your LO nursing? 2, morning/wakeup and bedtime
3. Does your LO nurse to sleep? If not, what is their bedtime routine like? She nurses at bedtime but not to sleep. We do bath, PJs, books, nurse. Sometimes she dozes while nursing but mostly she's awake. When she's done, it's sleep sack and into the crib with her bunny, doll, and 2 blankets.
4. What is your LO's name for BFing? Boo-boo
Non-breastfeeding question of the week:
What do you usually eat for breakfast on weekdays? Cereal at home, large travel mug of coffee in the car on the way to work.
2. At least 4x
3. He nurses right before going into crib drowsy. This is a recent thing as he used to nurse to sleep. I'm thrilled with the change, and he did it on his own.
4. He calls it milk in his baby talk.
5. I eat oatmeal & coffee. Alex eats cream of wheat or frozen waffles and fruit.