Second chances — The Bump
September 2014 Moms

Second chances

Just curious, if you could have a do over of this entire process what would you do different? Find out the sex, change the name, go natural or add in every drug allowed. For me I love the name, I just think I would have waited on the induction. I also would have done those hospital newborn pictures, What about you?
«1

Re: Second chances

  • I would have tried breastfeeding longer. I tried for two weeks but my supply was extremely low. I tried different things to increase it but I was so stressed and frustrated I just gave up. It ended up being for the best though. LO was hungry and I was crying at every feeding because I wasn't giving her what she needed.
    str13kearls227lynds002
  • Loading the player...
  • I would have taken more free things from the hospital and not bought so many newborn things since my son went straight to size 1s and larger clothes.
    Together since: 1/19/09 Married: 3/14/09 Newest addition added: 9/7/14
    str13Lobsterface22
  • I would have skipped the epidural and just had some iv drugs. Maybe things wouldn't have gone so fast and I wouldn't have had to try to not push for 45 minutes. Plus it didn't work very well and I had the dreaded epidural headache for a solid week. I would have also told my parents to scram once the contractions were getting bad rather than suffering in silence until my dad, not my mother, said it was time to leave.
    jaime52005
  • I really think the Team Green thing is awesome, but I don't know if I could've waited that long!! But I might liked to have tried to. I might try next time!

    And I ended up electing for induction, I feel guilty about that now. Nothing bad happened at all, but I feel bad. Now I think I could've waited longer. At the time I was emotionally unravelling and I think my OBGYN knew that. (He tried to make the birth as calm and pleasant as possible, he even did it on Saturday!!! Fewer laboring mommas!!)
    [Deleted User]SanRemo
  • I would have gone straight to the hospital when I suspected my water broke, instead of "waiting around to see what happens" as I was instructed to do so by the on call doc. Definitely not worth the infection/fever I ended up with.

    *O17 June Siggy Challenge - You had 1 job!*
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Pregnancy Ticker
  • This for me too. Luckily I didn't have an infection, but I didn't get checked because I had a slow leak and not an obvious water breakage. Since I couldn't be sure when the break occurred, everyone assumed it was. over 24 hours and treated me accordingly which was a major pita. Next time I'll be that crazy lady running to the hospital to get checked out 50 times for peeing myself.
    Jen9608 said:

    I would have gone straight to the hospital when I suspected my water broke, instead of "waiting around to see what happens" as I was instructed to do so by the on call doc. Definitely not worth the infection/fever I ended up with.

    purplestarz
  • I would have called when I started having faint headaches. Being diagnosed with pre-e while in labor was quite the surprise and the 24 hour magnesium drip after was HORRIBLE. I hardly could even hold the baby.

    I also would have found out the sex. The "surprise" wasn't as exciting as I thought it would be.
    image"funny">imageimage
    Mom of Boys!!

    Baby #1 - 3 years old
    Baby #2 - Born 10/1/14

    kaileemariep
  • Being induced ended up saving my daughter so I'm OK with it. However the epidural almost killed me so I'd skip that
  • I had 42 hours of back labor that stalled at 8cm. DH thinks the epi stalled it so I would have just done IV drugs. I wished I had had a vaginal birth instead of the unplanned c/s.

    I also would have stuck with nursing longer. EPing sucks!
    Anniversary

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I wish I would have been able to sleep the night before. My contractions started at 11pm on a Sunday night & I had LO at 5amTuesday. My lack of sleep led to tiring out while pushing quick. After 90 minutes, they had to use the vacuum. I'm glad I got the epi, I pushed it off until midnight.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker image
  • Yes I would've been more proactive about how to get induction started. Dr skipped cervadil and cytotek and went straight to pitocin and my body didn't respond so we wasted an entire 24 hours

    TTC since 2.11
    BFP #1: 3.15.11- c/p
    MTHFR Dx 6.13-Rx- folate and B12
    BFP #2: 11.9.13 -m/c Trisomy 4
    BFP #3 1.18.14 EDD 9.27.2014


  • I wish I hadn't pushed so hard and fast. The doula that taught my cb class said not to go fast to avoid tearing but DH and I were so excited I think I didn't pace it right. I wound up with a second degree tear.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • There was nothing I could do to avoid my c-section. I really wish I could have done more with DD. I feel like she doesn't like me now, all she wants is her daddy and it use to be all about me. I keep thinking if I spent more time doing things with her she'd still love me. She's always so excited to see her daddy. One bad thing about being a SAHM, she never gets to miss me, she's always with me. I know she loves me bc I'm mamma but I feel like she just doesn't like me anymore.
    kaleb87
  • There was nothing I could do to avoid my c-section. I really wish I could have done more with DD. I feel like she doesn't like me now, all she wants is her daddy and it use to be all about me. I keep thinking if I spent more time doing things with her she'd still love me. She's always so excited to see her daddy. One bad thing about being a SAHM, she never gets to miss me, she's always with me. I know she loves me bc I'm mamma but I feel like she just doesn't like me anymore.

    I feel the same way.


     

    kaleb87
  • I would have said "no" more. DD was born on Tuesday night, we were released Wednesday night and Thursday we had 7 visitors. We didn't have a day of just our little family until she was 2 weeks old and I feel ripped off! Not only was it crazy just from having a new baby but the steady stream of visitors made her whole first 2 weeks a total blur, like I hardly remember them at all. Makes me so sad.
    str13Ahlome08
  • str13 said:

    mana8503 said:

    I would have stayed on top of the oxy for pain post c section. I had to ask for it, unlike the motrin. I had an irrational fear of getting addicted. I finally started asking for it after the nurse talked to me.

    Part of me wants to say I wish we went straight to a c section and not have went through 26 hours of labor to never progressing to 10 cm. But I wouldn't change our story for anything. I know I tried.

    I'm so glad I read this. You saying "I wouldn't change our story for anything. I know I tried." Gave me such peace about the choices, and the choices thrust upon me. Thank you. It even made me cry a little!! :)
    @str13 - awe! I'm glad it helped you! It took me a while to feel better about ending up with a c section. The stigma is real, if only in my head. I felt like I had to justify it to everyone. But now I just look at my healthy growing baby girl and it doesn't matter how she got here.

    A wise nurse told me "it's not the journey, it's the destination". It came back to me weeks later, and I say that to myself when I question things. I wish I could thank her.
    Eliza Mae - September 16th, 2014
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    str13Ahlome08Sicheyanne
  • There are days I wish I could have had a vaginal birth instead of a c section. I wish I could have pushed and been able to hold him as soon as he was born. I know the unplanned c section was needed but I wish I didn't have to miss out on his first hour of life.

    I also wish we had more pictures of the three of us when DS was born. We have tons of us but only like 2 as a family.
    BFP #1 7/23/12: EDD 4/1/13.  MMC discovered on 9/4/12 @ 10w1d
    BFP# 2 3/9/13:  EDD 11/12/13 m/c 3/15/13 @ 5w3d
    RPL testing shows one copy of MTHFR gene mutation. 
     BFP#3 12/24/13: EDD 9/5/14 Beta #1 13 DPO 168! Beta #2 16 DPO 895!
     First US 1/9/14 @ 5w6d Strong HB!
    2nd US 1/23/14 @ 7w6d baby is still doing great! 3rd US 1/31/14  9w0d: Beautiful wiggly baby! Keep growing baby!
    3/17/14 US @ 15w3d:Its a BOY!

     

    My rainbow baby Isaac has arrived! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • There are days I wish I could have had a vaginal birth instead of a c section. I wish I could have pushed and been able to hold him as soon as he was born. I know the unplanned c section was needed but I wish I didn't have to miss out on his first hour of life.

    I also wish we had more pictures of the three of us when DS was born. We have tons of us but only like 2 as a family.

    My nipple is in all of our "brand new family" photos so they're not shareable! I wish I would have covered up but it was the last thing on my mind, haha.


     

    kaleb87SanRemobarbiedoesbabyAhlome08
  • I wish I didn't have a csection. It wasn't planned and I was in labor from Sunday night and he was born Wednesday morning. He had all kinds of issues that kept him from coming out so it couldn't be helped when his heart rate starting spiking. But this caused us to be separated for awhile. The nurses couldn't do any tests or anything with him until he was brought to me. The nurses couldn't even work on other babies cause they were trying everything with him. So I know I tried everything for the birth I wanted and I'm ok with it but didn't want the separation.


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • trombonertromboner
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its Photogenic
    member
    edited November 2014
    Ahlome08 said:
    The only thing I would have changed: My water broke and I wasn't in labor, So I had to be induced. I wouldn't have drank all that raspberry leaf tea and done all of those stair steppers the day before. I still feel kind of bad that if I hadn't tried everything to get him out, maybe I wouldn't have been in labor for 23 hours and he wouldn't have gotten an infection. Also, I can't help but wondering if his heart murmur would've been smaller. He was only a day early, but who's to say 2 more weeks in my womb wouldn't have helped him grow more? I now understand why STMs say keep that baby in as long as possible. It's not them being mean or hateful, it's then hoping you won't have to go through the difficulties they went through.
    @ahlome08 ((hugs)) Don't blame yourself for how your labor went or for your LO's infection. I'm the laziest couch potato on the planet and with my first my water broke (slowly leaked rather) at 38w5d and I was not in labor AT ALL. No dilation, no thinning, no contractions. They induced me and it took over 30 hours for DS to suddenly flip over and come out (once he decided to come out he came out FAST). He had an infection and had to spend 48 hours on an antibiotic drip. I did nothing to coax him out, these things just happen sometimes.
    ______________________________________________

    Two kids, two BMBs, a couple hundred friends on IG and FB, a dozen really close best friends that I talk to daily, tons of knowledge learned, inside jokes made, joys experienced, and hardships shared.

    Way to ruin a good thing for app reviews. Worst business decision ever. Stop making it worse by deleting negative reviews, refusing to delete both banned and current users' accounts, and dancing around serious questions asked of you.
    Ahlome08Vavavictoria
  • I wish I wound have believed I was in labor a lot earlier. My husband was telling me all day I was in labor and I kept saying know I just did to much and needed to rest, nope I was in labor. An hour before he was born things got real and I full on panicked, I just didn't have time to mentally prepare and it really affected me.
    Everyusernameistakenstr13
  • I would have actually packed my hospital bag the morning of my last doctors appointment. I had a feeling, and I decided sleep was more important than having a just in case bag. Having H go home and try to find the things I wanted was irritating/painful. He brought all the wrong things! lol. I also wish I had told him to take a pic of them taking her out of me. He got one with her lifted out, but not coming out and I'm totally jealous of the pic my friend has of it. I thought I'd be grossed out, being surgery and all, but it is beautiful/awesome/incredible.


    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers image
    trombonerstr13[Deleted User]
  • I couldn't have avoided my induction or c-section, the pre-e was making me a hostile environment for baby, and the c-section happened because Ro didn't tolerate the induction. Her heart rate plummeted to 50bpm an hour and a half into the process. 

    What I WOULD have done differently is asked for blood pressure medication upon discharge, and been better about staying on bed rest when I got home.  I was re-hospitalized on Tuesday after being discharged on Thursday because my BP went through the roof, I started feeling like my flesh was burning, and I honestly had the worst headache of my life.  I was fixing to start having seizures and I didn't even know it until the ER staff heard that I'd had pre-e and threw me on the mag faster than a speeding bullet because things were starting to look ugly.  I also would have asked DH to help me more during the MOTN stuff between those two hospitalizations, I just have this awful feeling that if I'd asked for more help, and pushed less hard, I could have avoided the big mess.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    str13ashaw512 JanisBaby14[Deleted User]
  • I would have liked to be team green. I was with DS1 and loved it. This time, I went with DH's request. As far as other things....not sure I could control it, but, I'd love not to be GD for a third time!
    IMG_4550[1] Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

     

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    str13mrsdanielleM2010
  • @tromboner‌ thanks! That makes me feel a little better :)
    tromboner

  • I would like to say that if we have another I would be Team Green but I know that I'm nosy and I could never make it through without knowing.



    This is what I'm worried about too!! Lol if we have a 3rd I'd like to think I could wait...but I doubt I could. Lol
    [Deleted User]
  • I would go without the mirror next time, traumatized me for life. ;) And more pictures at the hospital! And although I couldn't really prevent it, I wouldn't go back to work so quickly.

    Ahlome08[Deleted User]suitern
  • I went into labor around 9pm and I was hoping to have a natural birth but my contractions slowed way down and I was exhausted. I opted for the epidural probably around 3am so I could try and sleep (that never happened). I don't regret it but I wish I wouldn't have been so tired and could have tried to go longer.

    Also, newborn pictures. I didn't realize the hospital even offered them until I was at home going thru all of the paperwork. I got really sad and started crying because I didn't know. Lol.

    And rest. I definitely did not rest enough. I always feel like I have to be doing something. Even now, I'm so tired and little man is sleeping yet I am not. Laundry and dishes are going.
    Lobsterface22Ahlome08
  • For the next one I won't let DH travel so close to my due date. I was super stressed about him making it back for DD's birth and it super sucked that he wasn't around when my water broke and I was freaking out at home alone
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker 

    Pregnancy Ticker
    Lobsterface22Ahlome08
  • @mtlotslove, I'm so with you on the resting!!  I'm pretty good at being lazy when baby's asleep, but I'm terrible about resting when someone's here helping when he's awake.  I can't help hovering the whole time :P

    @sprocketsngadgets, I second that about not letting DH travel.  He ended up being home when I went into labor, but he traveled until 6 days before my due date and I was soo nervous during that time.

    The only thing I'd change about my labor is I would've gone to the hospital earlier so I could've gotten in the birthing tub sooner.  My hospital allows FTMs to get in the water at 7 cm, and when I got there I was already at 9.  But even that was a crap shoot - I was 9 cm dilated after only 3.5 hrs of labor.
    mtlotsloveAhlome08crystangel
  • kelbel716 said:

    I would have been a better advocate for my own care while in the hospital.

    First, I should have demanded better from the LC in the hospital- don't ask if I have questions and then leave 5 min later. I'm a FTM, I have no clue what I'm doing or what questions I should be asking.

    Second, I should have taken a dose of stronger pain meds before I was crying from all the pain and itching.

    Ultimately all turned out well and I am comfortable with what we are doing, but I could have made my own path a little easier and a little more guilt free.

    What is it with these LCs... She never came to see me... I'm a FTM I also have no idea what I'm doing ... After I was discharged I left three messages on her machine over three weeks with no return call... I gave up breastfeeding after three weeks due to poor supply and lack of help... Sorry for my rant I'm still pretty upset I couldn't exclusively breastfeed ... Anyway if there was one thing I could have changed I probably would have worked a little harder on the breastfeeding thing and did a little more research on it myself
  • I would have been more vocal about having skin to skin and getting him to latch right after he was born.  I allowed the nurses to take him and clean him and weigh him and all that pretty much right away.  By the time they were done, they were already trying to get me out of the room into the mother-baby unit downstairs, and I didn't get a chance to try and BF him within the first hour.  And then by the time they tested him when we got to my room, his sugar had already dropped.  I think if I had gotten a chance to BF him right away, it might have stayed up.  
    Me: 31 DH: 31
    Married 08/11/12 & TTC Since 10/13
    Previous Endo and Ovarian Cyst DX 
    March 2010: Lap. Surgery & D&C--removed 2 cysts 
    BFP: 12/20/2013 EDD: 09/03/2014 
    Travis Karel arrived on 08/21/2014 at 38w1d.
    BFP #2!  Travis is getting a sibling!
    EDD: 1/24/2017

    Mama to my two furbabies Sam and Phoenix
     
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    ashaw512 Lobsterface22JanisBaby14[Deleted User]
  • Megan09140Megan09140
    25 Love Its 10 Comments First Anniversary Photogenic
    member
    edited November 2014
    I wouldn't have changed much, I think everything went really well. The only thing I would have changed was I wouldn't have let DH leave to get food when I was at 5 cm and doing well barely in any pain cuz right after he left the pain hit like a brick wall and I fell apart and called him crying and I started vomiting and got the epidural when I was planning natural.
    But I am happy how the epidural turned out, it was a great one. I could feel my legs and move the and still felt everything but the pain of the contractions
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards