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September 2014 Moms
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going crazy...

CUBBIESMAMA3CUBBIESMAMA3 member
in September 2014 Moms
I feel like I'm going nuts. Between DS running around in circles constantly, him getting into everything, DD needing to eat all the time, DH sleeping all day, nothing getting done around the apartment, having to go back to work in two weeks and now having to move... I feel like I'm going nuts.

How can I get rid of this feeling? There is so much to do. DH doesn't really help all that much, and DS doesn't help either. I have to tell him everything fifty times before he does a fraction of what I need him to do. I just need help. I just want to cry right now I'm so stressed. And I'm the one who has to do all of the apartment research too. I'm tearing up just thinking about it. The lack of sleep isn't helping either. What can I do to relieve this?
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Re: going crazy...

  • Ivorytower2Ivorytower2 member
    Poor lady. Do you definitely have to move right now? I've felt like this at times and the feeling for me usually stems from sleep deprivation. Will LO take a bottle? Maybe DH could handle night duty just for one night while you sleep in another room and get a full night sleep? It might help make everything seem more manageable.

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  • kateroniumkateronium member
    Also maybe sit down and have a talk with your hubby if he's the type that sit downs work on. Try to get him to understand that parenting isn't just a one parent job and you need help
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  • bf43005bf43005 member
    Can you leave both LOs with DH for even an hour and go for a drive or walk. I love going for a walk but have only one LO so I throw him in the stroller. It helps me calm down. Maybe contact a realtor to help find a new place to live to take the pressure off you?


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  • ariellmaeariellmae member
    Make a list for DH I've had better luck with that than asking for things a bunch of times. And it sounds mushy and corny but when I feel overwhelmed I'll go through my phone of the cute times of my LO or listen to songs like "Don't Blink" and it helps make me be appreciative. I've also heard people say good things about busy bags... A bag of toys your toddler could only play with when you feed or make dinner! There's a bunch of ideas on Pinterest and dollar store ideas. As far as the apartment I would do that while your nursing both trulia and craigslist have apps.

    I hope this makes sense! I feel like I'm rambling! Good luck!
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  • CUBBIESMAMA3CUBBIESMAMA3 member
    I think that I'm going to send DS and DH to the in laws house alone tonight. DH will be working over there, and DS can hang out with Nana and Grandpa for awhile. DH can do the damn laundry and help me out. That way when LO is asleep, I can try to relax a bit. When DH gets home, he can also take over for me while I get sleep for once.

    @Ivorytower2‌ we have to move by January. They are upping the rent and requiring renters insurance now. That's something we can't afford right now.

    @bf43005‌ that's not a bad idea. I think that I'll go see someone who can help us with that. The tricky part is that we want to move out of the town we're in to the next town or two up the highway. The city has gotten too much for us with all the noise and everything. I'll see what I can do. Thanks for the tip.
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  • HorseLover11HorseLover11 member
    I'm sorry mamma. I hope DH steps it up and helps allege some of your load - it sounds like you've got a good plan in place.

    Off BC, NTNP since June 2011

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  • jht14jht14 member
    Hugs. Definitely talk to your DH maybe then he will realize and start helping more.
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  • aliciak316aliciak316 member
    I'm sorry you're having to go through all this stress. Try and remember it's all temporary. Lists really help me that way I can cross things off and just that visual helps me out. Also if your husband is anything like mine being overly direct is the only way he'll get anything done. If I say something about the floors needing to be cleaned hell just agree with me but not do it, I have to say "babe please clean the floors before nap time" then he will help out. And yes he needs the time limit or he'll put it off for days, but if I get all stressed and start doing it, he was just about to do it!! Weird
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  • kaileemariepkaileemariep member
    When I feel like this I cry out to Jesus for help. His peace is amazing even in the midst of chaos. I hope things come together soon for you. Go take a hot bath if you can and do some deep breathing♡
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  • rlyttlerlyttle member
    Can you call your mom, sister, or friend to come help one day? Even if they just come over to watch the kids, then you can get work done. I also agree that lists help me a lot. They also help DH. So maybe make a list for you & a list for him. Hang in there Momma!
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  • CUBBIESMAMA3CUBBIESMAMA3 member
    Thanks ladies. DH and DS just left so its me and LO and its finally quiet in here. I'm going to make me some dinner and drink the last beer in there after DD finishes eating. :-)

    DH is now talking about us temporarily moving in with his parents. As much as I care about these people, they are very difficult to live with. It would help us to save some money though, and they do have the room. My DH is going to offer to pay his dad for us to stay. I think that will help ease the burden on everyone, and it saves us over five hundred a month.

    The reason we are even considering this is b/c my maternity leave hit our savings very hard, as I was the primary breadwinner. Its going to take awhile to get back on our feet.

    The other reason is that my car may be finally giving out. It is old and wasn't well maintained by the previous owner. Hopefully it will hold out till tax time. We were going to get a newer one anyway.

    We will still move out of town like we want, but we are going to take more time to plan it and find a place, not to mention work. It's too far of a commute from where we want to live to my current job. With what I make, it's not worth an hour on the highway in traffic.

    I'll just pray that we will find something and end up where God wants us to be. I'll still be looking for an apartment in case the parents say no, though. Maybe something will come up. You never know.
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  • str13str13 member
    @CUBBIESMAMA3‌ I'll pray for you girl! :( this all sounds so stressful, but it sounds like y'all have found a temporary solution that helps take a lot of the stress off of you having to find an apartment *right* now!! I will keep you in my prayers though. Hang in there!! :)
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  • CUBBIESMAMA3CUBBIESMAMA3 member
    Thanks @str13‌. I really appreciate that. :-). I'm not real crazy about the idea of moving in with his parents, but I can see a few upsides to it. It'll be nice to have a little extra help with DS one in a while, and I'll finally be able to take the kids outside when I want to so that they can let off some steam. I can't exactly do that where we are now. My MIL is a little nosy, but so are my parents. I know how to deal with that. We'll see what happens. I'll keep y'all updated. Thanks again for the prayers.
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  • MrsLaLaBugMrsLaLaBug member
    Wishing you the very best!! It sounds like a lot to deal with! Hoping you come through it on the sunny side very soon!
                                                                                      
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  • JanisBaby14JanisBaby14 member
    CUBBIESMAMA3 said:

    I think that I'm going to send DS and DH to the in laws house alone tonight. DH will be working over there, and DS can hang out with Nana and Grandpa for awhile. DH can do the damn laundry and help me out. That way when LO is asleep, I can try to relax a bit. When DH gets home, he can also take over for me while I get sleep for once.

    @Ivorytower2‌ we have to move by January. They are upping the rent and requiring renters insurance now. That's something we can't afford right now.

    @bf43005‌ that's not a bad idea. I think that I'll go see someone who can help us with that. The tricky part is that we want to move out of the town we're in to the next town or two up the highway. The city has gotten too much for us with all the noise and everything. I'll see what I can do. Thanks for the tip.

    Do this momma!! Just get a break and try to get some me time. And take a breather. Can you ask ILs to help at all with DS? Like a night/day stay while you figure out your apartment/moving situation?

    Thinking of you. ((HUGS))
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  • CUBBIESMAMA3CUBBIESMAMA3 member
    Thanks for all the support ladies. Baby smiles and a little extra sleep has helped immensely. Not to mention the quiet time that I got last night when DS and DH went to the in laws house. It was absolute heaven. I appreciate you guys so much. :-)
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  • Ahlome08Ahlome08 member
    Hang in there! Everything will work itself out in the end :) Also, I def recommend staying with his parents for awhile. DH and I did that before we got married so we could save up $$ for a house. It's amazing how much you can save and how much less stressed you'll be when money isn't something you'll have to worry about as much.
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