Limbo Check-In 10/27

ac5008 · October 2014

Hi ladies! I figure Ill start this at the beginning of the week, at least until I get answers myself

So tell us, if youre in limbo and need support during this time:

What is your current status?

When is your next appointment?

Any fears / concerns / symptoms?

ac5008 · October 2014

What is your current status? My ultrasound last week showed a week lag from what I believed to be to what the baby was measuring. Although a few days could account for my tracking, the measurements would mean that I got a BFP at 4 DPO

Im hoping that the early sonogram was off - she only took one measurement. But Ive also had lots of ultrasounds at this stage and I know what Im looking at. I am not optimistic.

When is your next appointment?

November 4th is my next ultrasound. I cant believe that I have to wait until then, but I understand why I do. This seems like the most cruel joke in all of the world. My previous miscarriage seems so easy now - my body did it and it was over.

Any fears / concerns / symptoms?

My symptoms are still pretty strong, but this morning Ive felt a bit less nauseous and have had horrible lower back pain. I want so badly to be positive but I feel like Im setting myself up for failure. Ive also made the mistake of googling, so now Im doubly paranoid

roots&wings · October 2014

@ac5008 Thanks so much for starting this thread!! I hope everything goes well for you & that you are able to not stress out too much during the wait. (I know easier said than done)

What is your current status? I went for another transvaginal ultrasound today. The doctor said that he saw what looked like a small gestational sac. It measured 5 and a half weeks. He could not tell if there was a heartbeat or not. He referred me for another ultrasound with another doctor sometime this week. He said that everything could be just fine and that I probably just ovulated later than I thought, especially since my betas rose.

When is your next appointment? I'm waiting on a call from my OB now to see where they can get me in this week.

Any fears / concerns / symptoms? I'm scared that it just might be a sac with no living baby. However, I went in expecting the worst today and feel kind of relieved that I didn't get bad news. Or any news actually. I know I should be frustrated that I don't know anything. But I'm really just numb to it now. I will say that the ultrasound was very hard to see. Normally there is a black spot where the sac is. & mine was the same color as the rest of the scan.. you could just see the outline of the sac. So that concerns me a little.

Good luck and lots of positive thoughts to all my limbo ladies!

ac5008 · October 2014

@roots&wings, praying this is just baby hiding out and you'll see more at the next appointment.

This may be hard for some to read, so trigger warning .......

I want this baby more than anything, but I also can't stand the thought if it struggling in there. If it has to go, I hope it's quickly and peacefully. We have been through a loss before, and I know we can do it again. But I would rather hurt than have baby in there trying to hang on.

Of course, I prefer that this is ours to take home. I keep praying that it all is just a bad bump in the road.

AngieL610 · October 2014

Current status: waiting for blood work. I was supposed to be 8 weeks last Weds, but measured around 5 weeks. No heartbeat

Next appointment: this Friday for another u/s

Concerns: I had quiet a few cramps yesterday, which I know could be my darling uterus stretching. I had some spotting today for the first time -- all dark brown.

I want this baby. I've been talking to our little peppercorn (our nickname) nonstop, telling him/her to "Grow baby grow!" Keeping my fingers crossed. This is my first pregnancy and I was so excited. So so so excited. Now, I'm trying to stay calm, have faith and think positive

BookishMomma · October 2014

Joining in here due to lowish and slowish rising betas.

What is your current status? 4w6d

When is your next appointment? Other than betas, not until Nov. 11 (7w) when I'll have my first U/S.

Any fears / concerns / symptoms?

Just got a call with my 3rd beta draw results. Here's the whole set so far:

4wks - 61.1

4w2d- 112.57 (doubling time of 52.84)

4w6d- 284.19 (doubling time of 71.85 hours)

The nurse from the RE's office who called me was very positive about it and said the rise is "absolutely appropriate" for the range they would hope to see. She kept saying, "this is good" and was really encouraging. But I've had 3 miscarriages in the last year, so of course my brain is going nuts.

I know that the generally accepted doubling time is anywhere from 48 to 72 hours. And I've sort of heard people say that their REs like to see an increase of at least 60% over 2 days (mine says that 50% is OK). But REALLY? Why do my numbers have to be at the absolute low end/borderline of that spectrum? Come on little babycakes, pick up the pace!

I will get one more draw, either Friday or Monday. When I go in is totally up to me and how laid back and/or crazy I'm feeling. Any spare prayers or positive vibes would be appreciated.

eta:

@roots&wings I hope you are able to get in soon to the new doctor and get some more info.

@angieL610 sending growing vibes your way

@ac5008 I know what you mean... Obviously I want this to be our rainbow baby, but if it's not going to end well, I want that to happen sooner rather than later.

forgetfulfranny · October 2014

I started spotting Saturday at 7w4d with cramping. I basically haven't stopped bleeding for 48 hours. I went in today for an u/s and blood work. I am 7w6d and sono showed 6w3d and no heartbeat.
We do nfp so I know my dates are accurate. I go back Friday for more blood work and another sono.
My APRN didn't think it looked very good & frankly I don't either

We were getting so excited. (I even already ordered our Christmas cards with the announcement on them)

AngieL610 · October 2014

@forgetfulfranny I'm SO SO sorry. I feel your pain. Sending positive thoughts your way!

@Bookishmomma ahhh! right on the border

Definitely praying for you

BookishMomma · October 2014

@forgetfulfranny I'm so sorry you're going through this. ((hugs))

familiasevilla · October 2014

What is your current status?

I was measuring 6 weeks 3 days, when by LMP I would have been 7 weeks 5 days...I wasnt charting or anything so I know an O date can be off. I went in for some light spotting and they did an abdominal and vaginal ultrasound. There were two sacs, neither with a heartbeat. The doctor seems hopeful, and everything looked good, but that's her personality...she said to come back in two weeks (that was last week) and we'll know more about whats going on and if there's growth and a heartbeat...

When is your next appointment?

Next appointment is Nov. 4...its been a long week and still another week to go!

Any fears / concerns / symptoms?

I have a huge lack of symptoms...with my first baby I have wicked bad nausea 24/7. This time nothing. I know each pregnancy is different, but when you don't know what's going on everything seems like a concern.

ac5008 · October 2014

Ladies, I am sending thoughts and prayers and huge hugs to anyone that needs them. Limbo is a terrible place to be. I hope you'll come here as often as you need for support or to say whatever you need to say.

roots&wings · October 2014

I'm taking myself out of limbo.

I had an ultrasound in radiology today and gestational sac still only measures 5 weeks and 1 day. She wants me to come back and do another one in 10 days which will be more like 13 days. Anyway, she told me based on my dates, and the date I got a positive pregnancy test, I should be further along, even if i ovulated late. Plus, they haven't seen a fetal pole or a yolk sac. And my betas didn't double. She told me to expect a miscarriage.

So, I'm not waiting 10 days. I'm grieving now. and if a miracle happens, then it will be so amazing.
But i cannot sit in limbo for another two weeks.
Once everything is said and done, I'm going to drink wine and eat sushi. I'm going to dye my hair, and get a tattoo. probably a tattoo in remembrance of this pregnancy. something meaningful to me. I'm going to eat deli meat and soft cheeses, and I'm going to grieve. Because this sucks.

I have been holding on for three weeks. It's time to let it go.
I hope all of you all have a better outcome and I will be praying for you all.

AngieL610 · October 2014

I started miscarrying on Monday and I'm still bleeding a little, but I feel a sense of calm now. Good luck, wonderful ladies. @roots&wings thinking of you and praying you get your miracle

ac5008 · October 2014

I am so sorry ladies. I was so hopeful the outcome would be different for everyone

sending you healing hugs and lots of thoughts today

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