April 2015 Moms

Hormonal, or normal?

I am going more with thinking it's normal, but have to say that my fiancé has me PISSED.

Today, he dropped on me that he is buying a $450 body kit for his car. When makes me angry the most is that we don't really have the cash for this, and secondly, obviously we have a baby on the way! When I tried to complain to him about it, he turns it around and yells at me, for yelling at him! In my mind, we have bills to pay, to keep a roof over our head, on top of that we are moving here in two months! I just get frustrated because he is also 11 years older than I am, but half of the time it's like our ages are reversed! PRIORITIES, man. PRIORITIES. My bitch fest is done, I just had to get it off my chest.

Re: Hormonal, or normal?

  • Hey, I can reuse my post from the last "my H is so mean post"! Yay!

    I would suggest communicating! Do you and your fiancé have a monthly budget? Do you each have money that you can spend how you wish? If this isn't in the budget at the moment, maybe you should sit down together, go through your expenses, and create a spending/savings plan. It doesn't sound like he actually bought it yet, so maybe you should discuss it first and then see if it's something you can afford or not.
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  • In addition to agreeing with PP's that putting your family drama online is completely ridiculous, and that seriously, no one cares, hormonal or normal is completely objective.

    Considering that everyone has different personalities and financial situations, reactions are varied.  What's hormonal for someone is the level of crazy some people may idle on.  

    Personally, if my SO wanted to spend it, he can.  He's the one working his ass off, he's more than allowed to purchase something he wants.  Now, for you, you said you two can't afford it, therefore a little annoyance is to be expected.  Its clear you idle on dramatic.  
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  • We still have separate finances.  (We'll probably get a joint checking once the baby comes)  He pays for certain things, I pay for certain things.  As long as he could still uphold his end of that bargain, I don't see why this is a life-ending argument.
    Together since 5.16.05 (16 & 19yo)
    Married since 3.6.10 (21 & 24yo)
    Baby Olivia coming 4.14.15 <3 (26 & 29yo)

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  • We have a joint account for all of our bill payments to come out of. We sat down and figured out exactly how much needs to go out in bills (including things like groceries and gas) and split it down the middle. For example, if we have 1000 dollars going out, we both need to contribute 500 dollars each to the joint account. Whatever money is left over in our individual accounts is ours to spend as we see fit. I agree with @jk3610 that this doesn't have to be a life ending argument
  • Hmm he said buying, so technically it wasn't bought yet and he talked to you about it first. If my H told me i couldn't buy something, i would be pissed. IF he talked to me about why i should hold off then that is a totally different story. You just started yelling.
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