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Babies Everywhere (children/pregnancy mentioned.. not mine)

SND1231SND1231 member
in Trouble TTC
OK... I need to vent.. People everywhere are pregnant!!! In my church there are 5 people pregnant and only one actually wanted to be pregnant.  The others were "accidents". One of the mothers seriously was mad about being pregnant with her third child. One was from a broken relationship and the mother is debating keeping the baby.  The list is never ending.  I just can't wrap my mind around this. I guess it is because I want a baby so very bad but physically can't do it on my own, and these mothers are taking everything for granted.  What I wouldn't give to know that my next test was a BFP instead of a BFN.... I also have a gender reveal shower tonight. I am seriously considering not going.  This is for the one mother that really wanted her baby (but only tried one time... seriously!!!). She is a close friend but I just don't know if I can be supportive tonight. Is this terrible?
Married: 12/15/2012    TTC: 08/2014
Husband: 26 SA: normal
Me: 23 Low AMH and damaged ovaries due to chemotherapy.
No AF or O in 3 years. HSG showed a slight T shaped uterus.

High Risk OB 9/29- got the ok to get pregnant.
RE Appt:  10/28/ U/S showed follicles, but also small damaged ovaries.
B/W results CD0: all normal except low AMH at 1.3
Cycle 1-November (TI)- Femera 2.5mg, 2mg Estradoil, and Trigger=BFN
Cycle 2-December (TI)- Femera 2.5 mg ,4mg Estradoil, and Trigger= No O
Cycle 3-January (TI)- Femera 5 mg, 2mg Estradoil, and Trigger=


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Re: Babies Everywhere (children/pregnancy mentioned.. not mine)

  • BunnyBerryBunnyBerry member
    I'm so sorry. :( I hope you are able to feel a bit more peaceful about it so you can enjoy the time with your friend, but if not, that is definitely not terrible! It's completely  normal and no one can expect you to just make your pain magically disappear. 
    January 3T Siggy Challenge - New Year's Resolutions
    image
    imageimage

    Me (29), DH (30) TTC actively 54 55+ cycles | All BFNs
    MFI (low everything) | Endo Stage 1 & Stenotic Cervix (treated) | PCO
    Married - July 2008 | Started TTC - Jan 2009 | RE Visit #1 - Mar 2014 
    IUI #1 ICI #1 - June | IUI #1.1 Laparoscopy - Aug
    IUIs #1.2, 2, 3 - Sept, Oct, Nov (Letrozole) - BFNs 
    IUI #4 - Dec (Bravelle) | IUI #5 - Dec/Jan (Bravelle) - 5 follies + TI - BFNs
    IUI #5.1 - Jan (Bravelle) Cancelled 
    Planning to start IVF in March!
    ***All Welcome***
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  • pjrosspjross member
    I think it's okay to skip the party if you're not up for it. A call to your friend so she doesn't think you just bailed my help her understand where you are.

    Me: 30  DH: 30
    Married 07.17.10
    TTC 08.2013
    In the midst of IF Testing:
    9.29.14: Blood work panel including TSH and FSH came back normal
    10.06.14: Ultrasound at CD10 revealed several small/med cysts on my ovaries, requested follow up ultrasound on CD3 next cycle
    10.14.14: 7DPO Progesterone Test (Scheduled)

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  • SND1231SND1231 member
    Ladies y'all are so amazing! Thanks for the support!
    Married: 12/15/2012    TTC: 08/2014
    Husband: 26 SA: normal
    Me: 23 Low AMH and damaged ovaries due to chemotherapy.
    No AF or O in 3 years. HSG showed a slight T shaped uterus.

    High Risk OB 9/29- got the ok to get pregnant.
    RE Appt:  10/28/ U/S showed follicles, but also small damaged ovaries.
    B/W results CD0: all normal except low AMH at 1.3
    Cycle 1-November (TI)- Femera 2.5mg, 2mg Estradoil, and Trigger=BFN
    Cycle 2-December (TI)- Femera 2.5 mg ,4mg Estradoil, and Trigger= No O
    Cycle 3-January (TI)- Femera 5 mg, 2mg Estra    doil, and Trigger=


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  • RositaRaeRositaRae member
    We had a death in the family and the funeral was today.  My husband's brother just had a baby, so all of these relatives we haven't seen in years kept asking "Now are you the ones with the new baby??"  It was so hard to have to say "nope...no baby" over and over today.  I completely understand.  My heart breaks when I hear about the people who weren't trying or tried and succeeded their first time.  It is this whole "I should be happy for you" but "I wish it was me" routine that goes on in your head each time.  

    Everyone around me is pregnant too.  I was recently at a birthday party and I was the only woman there not pregnant.  They all went in a corner and starting talking about their pregnancies and bonding over similar due dates.  I went over by the men since I couldn't relate to the women's conversation.  It is not terrible that you want to distance yourself from these things that make you unhappy.  You are human, you have feelings, and you can't help the way you feel!  I'm glad we have these message boards to vent on! :)
    Me: 28 DH: 29
    TTC since July 2013
    September 2013 period still hasn't started since getting off BC
    October 2013 OBGYN prescribed 4 months of unmonitored Clomid
    3 Months of Clomid, ovulated once
    Opted to not do 4th cycle without proper testing found new OBGYN
    January 2014 new OBGYN diagnosed me with PCOS ordered ultrasound
    January 2014 Ultrasound found possible uterine septum
    February 2014 MRI confirmed uterine septum, referral to RE
    March 2014 RE scheduled septum removal for late June
    Benched due to possible miscarriages if falling pregnant, back on BC
    June 2014 Septum Removal surgery, hysteroscopy/laparascopy
    Laparascopy revealed mild endometriosis
    Benched until September 2014 for recovery and healing
    October 2014 - First letrozole, HCG trigger, TI cycle, 18mm follie
    November 2014 - BFP - loss at 6 weeks
    January 2015 - Green light to try again 18mm follie, letrozole, HCG trigger 
    January 2015 - BFP - two ultrasounds and strong heartbeat found on Doppler!!!


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  • kallygirliekallygirlie member
    Pregnancy Mentioned...not mine

    I know how you feel.  I think someone had a party and everyone got pregnant and forgot to invite me.  I actually have a friend who told me her and her dh were thinking about trying for baby #2...she conceived 2 wks later.  I still have not spoken to her.  I'm not mad at her or anything, I'm happy for them.  I just handle it right now.  We have to do what we need to do to stay sane. Don't feel bad for how you feel, it's totally normal to feel that way.  sending you hugs
    Siggie Warning, BFP/Loss mentioned



    Me 31         DH 35
    Married since 4/16/11
    NTNP since 2008
    Actively TTC # 1 since 4/16/2011
    Sept 2012- Change Gyn after 3 yrs with no Diagnosis
    Oct 2012- Dx PCOS
    April 2013- 50mg Clomid.....BFN
    May 2013- Referred to RE
    Sept 2013- Clomid 50mg (no response), 100mg (2 mature follies), Trigger, TI.....BFN
    Oct 2013- Clomid 100mg, 2 Mature follies, Trigger, TI....BFN
    Nov 2013- Break to discuss IUI and other options
    Dec 2013- Clomid 100mg, Brevelle 75iu (CD 9,11,13-15) 112iu (CD 16-21) 150iu (CD 22-24)
    2 Follies vanished, Cycle scratched
    Jan 2014- Provera, awaiting AF
    Feb-Mar 2014- Gonal F 150iu (CD 3-9) 187.5iu (CD 10-12) 225iu (CD 13-22), 3 Follies, Trigger, IUI....BFN
    April 2014-Gonal F 225iu (CD 3-17), 1 Follie Trigger, IUI....BFP!!  Ectopic :*(
    Break after Ectopic May-Aug 2013
    Sept 2014- Fermera (CD 3-7), Pregnitude, 1 Follie, Trigger, IUI...BFN
    Oct 2014-     Fermera (CD 3-7), Pregnitude, 2 Follies, Trigger, IUI...BFP!!!
                 Beta #1: 144   Beta #2: 365    Beta #3: 1278     Miscarriage @ 6wks

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  • ShaunteeShauntee member
    edited October 2014
    I know how you feel. We usually have a minimum of 5 pregnant women in our church at a time. And about twice a month I get a meal registry invite for the women who just gave birth. Sometimes the Infertile Mrtyle in me thinks there is a preggo quota and every time a new woman gets pregnant, she is taking my spot. Totally irrational, I know. My husband and I took the day off yesterday and had some errands to run around town. Note to self, never run errands at 12:30pm again, that is when ALL of the pregnant woman run their errands. Literally every place we went I saw a pregnant woman.

    As for the Gender reveal party, it is totally ok that you don't want to go. There will probably be a shower for this woman that you can support her at, instead.


    Big hugs to you.
    Me-33 DH-36.
    Married 11/10 TTC 11/10
    06/11- diagnosed with PCOS 
    7/11- D&C and benched for a year 
    9/12-4/13-6 rounds of 50 mg Clomid- no sucess 
    6/13- new doc
    7/13-4/14- 6 more rounds of Clomid. 50 mg and then stepped up to 100mg- no success 
    5/14-7/14- took break waiting for new insurance 
    7/14-new insurance= new doc- actually a RE!!!! 
    7/14-HSG and blood test good-PCOS confirmed by new doc 
    10/14 looking forward to 1st IUI w/ Menopur. Blood Test= Negative
    11/14- IUI #2     w/ Menopur- Blood Test= Negative
    1/15- IUI # 3 w/     Menopur- Blood Test= Negative
    2/15- Self Benched this cycle
    3/15/15-Suprise BFP on natural cycle!!!! EDD-11/16/15

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  • SND1231SND1231 member
    Ladies.. I just wanted to say thank you again for the kind and supportive words.  I haven't told many people about my infertility as it is still just too hard to say out loud, so people don't realize how upsetting it is to me.  I am happy for all of my friends, but goodness... emotions are super high today. My husband is my rock, but even he sometimes doesn't understand why things to get to me.  You are all keeping me going! I don't know how I made it before yall!
    Married: 12/15/2012    TTC: 08/2014
    Husband: 26 SA: normal
    Me: 23 Low AMH and damaged ovaries due to chemotherapy.
    No AF or O in 3 years. HSG showed a slight T shaped uterus.

    High Risk OB 9/29- got the ok to get pregnant.
    RE Appt:  10/28/ U/S showed follicles, but also small damaged ovaries.
    B/W results CD0: all normal except low AMH at 1.3
    Cycle 1-November (TI)- Femera 2.5mg, 2mg Estradoil, and Trigger=BFN
    Cycle 2-December (TI)- Femera 2.5 mg ,4mg Estradoil, and Trigger= No O
    Cycle 3-January (TI)- Femera 5 mg, 2mg Estra    doil, and Trigger=


    Report Reply
  • pixiegirl32pixiegirl32 member
    SND1231 said:
    My husband is my rock, but even he sometimes doesn't understand why things to get to me. 
    I know what you mean here. My husband is amazingly supportive, says all the right things. But sometimes just doesn't understand how I feel when everyone around me is getting pregnant and I am not. :o(

    Also, Congrats on being 2 years cancer-free! :o)
    Married: 04/19/2014
    TTC: since April 2014
    Fur Baby: Dexter
    DH: SA = Average motility, Good count.

    Report Reply
  • Ann612Ann612 member
    A gender reveal shower?  Is this just the baby shower and they announce the gender?  anyway, I agree with others - skip it, skip it, ba dum dum dum be do bop bop

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