First time anxious mom Needs support

lduell25 · October 2014

this is my first pregnancy and I am so overly anxious and worried about everything as a result of it. I'm just looking for some support from other women who are pregnant for the first time. It's something I've always wanted and all the scary, unknown, out of my control things are making it hard to get excited or be truly happy. I'm so worried I will lose the baby or that something terrible will be wrong with it. Any reassurance or other crazy thoughts would help put my mind at ease. Thank you.

alvell · October 2014

I'm not a first time mom, but I do understand and identify with that feeling! The best advice I can offer is to say that you should try your best to relax and enjoy it. No amount of worrying will change anything. Today you are pregnant, and you can be happy about it. If you have a loss, (and I genuinely hope you never experience that), it will hurt, regardless of if you are super excited or not. I know it's not easy, but being pregnant is truly a gift, whether you are pregnant for a day, or if you carry a baby to term. Be excited, enjoy it. I promise you, it will go by more quickly than you think! One day you will look back and remember this pregnancy, and I hope you will look back on it fondly. Congratulations on your pregnancy!! I hope that you have a happy and healthy 9 months!

ashleydhilde · October 2014

I can identify with what you're feeling. I am also a first timer and very concerned about EVERYTHING, from lack of symptoms to waiting for an ultrasound. I have tried to remind myself that I'm doing everything I can to ensure a healthy pregnancy and baby, and the rest is out of my control. That's easier said than done though.

bossybluejay · October 2014

I feel the exact same way. I was talking to my mom about how I need to stop worrying about something potentially happening & only worry when there's something that actually warrants it.

KatieRoseRN83 · October 2014

I feel the same! I had a MC 2 years ago. This is my first pregnancy since them. So I'm anxious about everything! I had my first doctors appt today. Now I have to wait until Nov. 11 for my first ultrasound. I know I just have to be patient and try to enjoy everything! Good luck to all of you!

dojo1 · October 2014

I'm MORE nervous this time around than I was last time. I guess I feel like I just couldn't possibly be this lucky twice, you know? I'm still in limbo since my last u/s didn't show a heart beat.

AmberC311 · October 2014

First time for me as well. We were ttc for so long I'm just waiting for the bad news which totally sucks. I go back and forth between be so excited and happy to being a nervous wreck. Every little thing I feel I am racing to the bathroom to make sure there is no bleeding. I understand what will be will be. But I'm hoping for the best. Just can't wait for my first ultrasound in 1.5 weeks. I think that will relax me a bit. Edd isn't until late in the month so I feel so far behind everyone which probably does nothing for my anxiety lol. But I am so happy to have found all of you wonderful ladies. Happy and healthy 9 to us all!

betsyplunkett12 · October 2014

I'm also a FTM. I have been having the same problem with being a worry wart! My appt isn't until thanksgiving which I will be almost 11 weeks. I have found some good distractions: reading books, pinning baby items, and looking at these boards

. Thought for a happy and healthy!

asstevens79 · October 2014

This is my first pregnancy too. We spent 18 months ttc. I'm giving my worries to God. It's all in His hands so I'm putting my faith in Him. All will be as it should be. Prayers for all of us to have a happy, healthy pregnancy and a happy healthy bundle in June!

starlightgator · October 2014

I was pregnant two years ago and lost it at 11 weeks, so I'm also a nervous wreck right now and can understand what you're feeling. We spent a lot of time, energy, stress, and money to get here through 2 IVF's. I agree with what PP have said about worrying every time I have a bathroom trip, peeing all the time, and the awful MS. But, I also know what a blessing it is to be at this point. Trying to enjoy the ride because it's very short compared to the destination. Good luck to you. It looks like we have a great team to support us here.

ybreyn · October 2014

Thanks for this post Iduell25! I totally feel the same way. Thanks to all of the women who answered those who are FTM and those who are not. Guess I'll continue to distract myself until our first OB appt in 1.5 weeks!

nazpeitia · October 2014

This is my fourth pregnancy (I have two children) and I can tell you the worry is always there when you are pregnant. It's a good worry though! This is just the beginning of motherhood. You will ALWAYS worry about the safety and well being of your child not matter how small. The trick is to keep it at a healthy level. Something's are simply out of your control and it's important to understand that. Right now enjoy today, even if you are hovering over the toilet!

alygator11687 · October 2014

I am a FTM too and I am also anxious! We were ttc for 4 months and I've gone back and forth on whether I'm excited. It's better now that I've had my first appointment and know there is a heartbeat but now I'm anxious about actual labor. Like that shit seems scary!

scorpio2124 · October 2014

I feel the same exact way. I printed this quote out and put it at my desk at work - it seems to comfort me and remind me to change my process of thinking.

NanaBelle9 · October 2014

Congrats! I feel the same way, I am also a First Time Mother. It took us almost 7 years of trying to conceive. We are keeping it quiet until my first dr. Appt. Nov. 6th. I just want to make extra sure before I tell everyone. I don't know what to do or how your suppose to be feeling while pregnant so it's very worrisome.

allrightmeow · October 2014

Please try not to let your worry of things that are out of your control steal your joy. Say to yourself, "in this moment I am pregnant" and enjoy it.

One of my girlfriends obsessed about all the what ifs and after she gave birth realized she never really allowed herself to take in what her body was doing. She was very sad about it. You can never get that time back.

XOXO -June14

klkonwi · October 2014

I am completely overwhelmed with anxiety as well! 1st time ! The worst part is that I'm an OB nurse and can't take my mind off of it due to babies being in front of me 24/7. Ahhhh!!!!!
I just want to hear the heartbeat and I want to make sure the baby is still in there and fine! Keep the faith! And if u figure out any strategies to take away anxiety let me know!

sherstef · October 2014

Its also my first pregnancy and I have the same anxieties as you, your not alone

. My husband did ease my mind though, he told me our bodies are made to do this and worrying will not not change anything. What's meant to happen will happen. Shocked that came out of my husbands mouth lol. Its still scary and overwhelming....but again your not alone

GrisAndArnie · October 2014

I am a first time too. Last week I was so scared because I experienced a horrible cramp in the middle of the night. I vommited from the pain. I thought I had a miscarriage. It turns out it was something I ate. My husband and I were both googling every symptom but luckily one of the nurses and the doctor helped put me at ease and they said it sounded like a mild case of food poisoning. It was so scary! I just want to get to 12 weeks. I want the risk to go down!

shibby00 · October 2014

Not a ftm, but you the worry doesn't stop with the second, third, fourth pregnancy. I tell myself everyday that today I am pregnant, it is a glorious surprise, and it is wonderful.

amsuther005 · October 2014

This is my first time, too, and a baby wasn't planned for another two to three years and my boyfriend and I were unsure we would have bourbon because he did not think he could father children. (surprise!!) I'm terrified and anxious some of the time. Then I look in the mirror (I don't know if it's baby bump or just gaining weight because I eat properly now) and see the changes that signal that I'm pregnant and the worry goes away. I have my first ultrasound this week and as Wednesday gets closer, I get a little more worried. According to my mom (who wasn't supposed to have kids, but ended up with two daughters), it's perfectly normal to be worried, but the trick is to find ways to embrace the excitement too.

ldg1979 · October 2014

Right there with you - starting tomfeel like I was going insane
First time mom - went through infertility - all stars have aligned this far but now the worrying has set in
I want them to test my hcg levels again - they said they don't have to
My first ultra sound is nov 5 during my 6th week - excited and nervous about that

You name it I'm worried about it glad to know I'm not alone

lduell25 · October 2014

Words can't express how much it meant to me to read all these posts. I'm so glad I'm not alone and my feelings are validated. Thank you for all the support. Who knew words from people who've never met could be so powerful simply because we are going through a shared experience.

MegaNagle · October 2014

Waiting for my first ultrasound is brutal!!!

Sundaygirl200 · October 2014

Oh I feel exactly the same. Even though my pregnancy wasn't planned for a few years, I cannot imagine my life without having a baby in June next year now! I only found out on Wednesday and im already just over 8 weeks! I can't stop checking for blood or getting emotional and crying over other women's losses and being deeply petrified that will be me soon.
I haven't even seen the doctor yet, symptoms at a high, I just want to see the heartbeat now!
Reading this has made me feel not as alone so thank you ladies, wishing well on your pregnancies xx

bfrank2014 · October 2014

This is my first time as well and
I feel the same way! I worry about every little thing that could possibly go wrong! I go for my first Ultrasound November 5th and the day cannot come soon enough!!!! I hope i won't worry as much when we hear the heart beat!

trambo78 · October 2014

I'm in the same boat. I'm a FTM & AMA @ 36. My DH didn't understand when I suddenly darted into the restroom during our grocery shopping trip. I'm checking for blood frequently. I work in a ER and I get to see women losing their babies way too often. I also have to wait until Nov 5 for US. It can't come soon enough!

jduggs · October 2014

FTM here...
I'm so relieved to know I'm not alone in my constant paranoia/worries.
DH thinks I'm being dramatic, but if i have an alleviation in one symptom i panic. I still have symptoms, but my nausea has been a lot better (probably because I'm better at making myself eat and I've found some things that taste good, finally!).
Thank you ladies for sharing your stories, your worries and your strength!

xcoribethx · October 2014

I'm also a FTM. My fiancé & I were definitely not thinking about having babies for another year. I have no clue what to expect, and I'm so anxious. I think I will feel a little better after my first appointment. That's not for another couple of weeks. For now, I'm just taking it day by day. Remember, there are so many of us who are in the same boat! It's good to have this supportive community!

erbear84 · October 2014

I'm also a FTM. My DH and I had to go the the IVF route so I'm extra aware of things and pretty worried about things. I'll probably be that way until my ultrasound on the 6th (or after!). I'm trying to live in the moment, though - I have a book that says what's happening every day and DH and I like to read it and think about the amazing things going on in my body right now.

I have a friend who is giving me a "worry-free pregnancy" book and I really could use it!

dirtymartini · October 2014

FTM here as well... my worries have eased now that I had my first US and heard the heartbeat. But... the worries about actually being able to be a good mom are always nagging at me. I have no idea how to care for a baby, a toddler, a child, an adolescent. Just learn as we go I guess! it will be a fantastic journey so I am trying to be more excited than worried.

Jwood2113 · October 2014

I'm a FTM and I'm absolutely anxious and worried about every little thing. My husband and I are so excited to be pregnant, I worry that something will go wrong! I've been nauseous and exhausted, and am embracing it, knowing what those symptoms mean... I go between excited and anxious all the time!! I can't wait till my first appt on nov. 11th- I'll be 7.5 weeks!

Want a personalized experience?

First time anxious mom Needs support

Re: First time anxious mom Needs support

Choose Another Board

Search Boards