How do you stay calm between appointments?

MrsTwiddy · October 2014

I really struggle with anxiety between appointments (specifically ones where I have an ultrasound or get to hear the heartbeat.) This was a problem for me during my last pregnancy too. I went in this morning to have the Harmony blood test and I almost asked them if they could let me listen to the heartbeat to ease my concerns, but I knew they'd say no because it's still on the early side to be able to hear with a doppler (plus I'm overweight so that makes it harder) and I KNEW they wouldn't bust out an ultrasound machine just because I'm a nervous nellie.

I know realistically, nothing is wrong. I had an ultrasound at 9 weeks 4 days with a strong heartbeat and all was well. I know that the likelihood of something going wrong after that is very small, but I just can't stop worrying. Any advice?

Brittanyg713 · October 2014

I am struggling with the same thing. I heard my little one's heartbeat at 6 weeks + 6 days, but my next appointment isn't until Tuesday. It has been the longest 4 weeks of my life. I don't have any symptoms (I know I shouldn't complain), but it is really causing me to have anxiety.

I just try to think positive. Stressing out and thinking negatively isn't going to accomplish anything

Just try to remember the chance of us having a healthy baby is in our favor!

MrsTwiddy · October 2014

See! I had a very uneventful pregnancy last time, and this one has been the same. I'm exhausted all the time, and my breasts have been tender. The breast tenderness has started to come and go (which I KNOW is normal as 2nd tri approaches b/c the hormones even out) but it still wrecks my nerves.

I just keep trying to remind myself that this was clearly God's will. Like I said, we were scheduled to go in for IVF in January and this was totally out of the blue. I've gotten nothing but good news so far...I just need to calm down. I don't know if it makes me feel better that others struggle with this--I just feel bad that y'all worry so much too! LOL

lovebeingblonde · October 2014

I was going to suggest a doppler as well. But you mentioned difficulty with that route so not sure if it would work to ease your mind. I have a hard time finding LO's heartbeat with mine, but as long as I can catch if for even just a few seconds, it brings a LOT of relief.

Looking forward to what @ramy3 said... when I can finally start to feel LO moving around!

KER9171 · October 2014

I have the same worries!!! I just hit 11 weeks today and NT ultrasound on the 28th... Can't wait

MrsTwiddy · October 2014

lovebeingblonde said:

I was going to suggest a doppler as well. But you mentioned difficulty with that route so not sure if it would work to ease your mind. I have a hard time finding LO's heartbeat with mine, but as long as I can catch if for even just a few seconds, it brings a LOT of relief.

Looking forward to what @ramy3 said... when I can finally start to feel LO moving around!

Yeah I think the doppler would just make me worse because inevitably I wouldn't be able to hear it and I'd be in the emergency room. When the movement starts it is comforting, but @ramy3 was right--if you don't feel like they're moving ENOUGH it makes you crazy too! LOL I'm doing better at staying calm this time around, but its a constant struggle.

nolababybaby · October 2014

I felt the same way my first few weeks because I've had no symptoms except hunger and exhaustion. I was afraid to work out and to go on with my normal life. But now I try to remember that our bodies are made for this. You're doing great

Unknown · October 2014

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djm31012 · October 2014

I just try not to think about it, sometimes its easier than others. I heard the heartbeat at a little over 8 weeks and while that doesnt mean anything, the risk of miscarriage does drop significantly once you hear it. Also, my symptoms are def lightening up but not completely gone, and I have had nothing to indicate that something would be wrong...no cramping, bleeding etc. So I just focus on that. If at the 12 week we discover something different we will be devastated of course. But no point in ruining days now by panicking-stress is worse for the baby than anything else.

MrsTwiddy · October 2014

Good points from everyone--thanks for the support!

ambarnett1 · October 2014

I use a doppler every few days. I know where this baby stays, so I can find the hb within 15 secs even at 10 weeks and listen to it long enough to know it's in the normal range. That keeps me sane in the early days. I'm nervous about the 20 week ultrasound, but that's normal because it's a big one. We can't do anything to change the outcome, so I'm trying to enjoy it. A 6 month old also helps keep my mind off of things as well.

ladyteach0505 · October 2014

There's no guarantee you'll find it even if the baby is fine. It's why my OB is leery of recommending the home one. He had trouble finding mine this week and I had literally just had an ultrasound 30 minutes before that was just fine. He did find it, but it proved to me that even when things are fine those dopplers are not always easy to use. I'm thinking I might use mine once a week if I need to but I'd like to keep it to no more than that because I'm paranoid about doing it too much.

ladyteach0505 · October 2014

I won't lie, I was nervous when the dr had trouble Monday and I had JUST seen the baby. Smh. But I still might try today.

kj808 · October 2014

My doppler has been a huge comfort for me. I've been able to find the hb within a minute. I received my doppler when I was 10w3d and I found the hb easily.

It keeps my PgAL brain sane.

Ballet80 · October 2014

I don't stay calm. I had my first US at 7 weeks and we saw/heard the heartbeat. My next appt is next Friday in Halloween, I haven't been able to sleep because I am so worried all the time. I am hoping after this next appt I will calm down some as I will almost be out of 1st trimester, we shall see!!!

happywithhim715 · October 2014

I am not help because I am a nervous wreck too! My last ultrasound was at 9w5d and I am nervous for my next scan on Thursday, the 29th.

I will look into a Doppler. One brand better than others?

lala5507 · October 2014

I don't stop worrying. As I mentioned before, I won't be getting an ultrasound until 18 weeks this pregnancy. I am a visual person and it's driving my crazy that I can't SEE that things are ok. And a little part of me wants to confirm there is only one occupant.

happywithhim715 · October 2014

ramy3 said:

@happywithhim715 the Sonoline B from fetaldoppler.net is great.

Thank you!!

lecolby1 · October 2014

I am going through this right now. First US is this coming Tuesday (9 weeks 4 days). I am full of anxiety about if there will be a heartbeat/if it will look healthy... You name it, I worry about it.
I try to take deep breaths but it still gets to me... Let me know how you make out throughout your pregnancy.

ladyteach0505 · October 2014

Um 13 weeks, just tried to use the Doppler and couldn't get anything. Sucks.

khaleesi123 · October 2014

@MrsTwiddy‌ wait were you supposed to go in for IVF but got pregnant before that anyways? Wow good for you congrats

momtosam · October 2014

I have a doppler that I use every few days.

stark01938209 · October 2014

Mayflower- I have one too and so does my sister. She always used a Doppler. I also tend to be super sensitive to movements... I think sometimes having a tilted uterus is positive during early pregnancy

mmarschk · October 2014

I honestly don't stress at all. I didn't during my first pregnancy either, which was very uneventful except that I was huge and I got lots of extra u/s towards the end because my ob thought I was gonna have a huge baby. 9 lbs + is pretty normal in my family. I just think that this is what my body is made to do and freaking out just brings on unnecessary stress. Plus between work and trying to keep my house clean, my mind is pretty occupied.

alyssarenee2011 · October 2014

What baby Doppler do you recommend? I bought one from baby's r us and i can't find a heartbeat.

nicunursetomommy · October 2014

I just bought sonoline B Doppler ..should be here Monday. I have a feeling I'll be overusing it

Also, I have a slight advantage of being a nurse so I sneak down to the ultrasound department to check on my little one sometimes

so for the other nurses that's a great way to ease worries! Or if you have nurse friends!

queenhoneybee · October 2014

I was worried a few days ago because my symptoms disappeared. Now the mild cramping has returned and I'm worried because I'm cramping- ugh! This is so crazy, I should know better, I'm a STM but mothers will find something to worry about. Like @Ramy3 said, I still go into DS room to check if he's breathing. He's such a light sleeper that inevitably I end up waking him up and have to tuck him in and pray he falls back to sleep quickly.

MrsTwiddy · October 2014

khaleesi123 said:

@MrsTwiddy‌ wait were you supposed to go in for IVF but got pregnant before that anyways? Wow good for you congrats

@khaleesi123 Yes I was! We did back to back IUIs this summer (which is how we got our 21 month old daughter) but they didn't work and our doctor recommended we move on to IVF. After two failed cycles I was just exhausted so we decided we'd take a break until January and SURPRISE! Thank you so much--I'm honestly still in shock!

Thank you everyone for your advice. I did order a doppler....I think I'll wait to use it until I've already had an appointment that day so I will have heard the heartbeat (just in case I can't get it to work.)

cnicholslaw · October 2014

I was 10w 2d at my last appointment and was really surprised that we were able to hear a clear heartbeat even though I'm really overweight. It took the nurse a couple of minutes to find it and she argued that I must be further along, but it was there. (I'm also positive how far along I am because we tracked ovulation and I've had two dating scans). There's still part of me that wants my own Doppler, but I'm not sure if I should get one because I might be tempted to listen in too much!

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